Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 on I see you mentioning your grandparents, but not your parents, OP.

What’s their role? Then I’ll comment.

OP here. My parents are divorced. My Mom still works full time and has an hour commute on either end so we don't see her much on weekdays. On weekends, it's her shift to take care of my grandparents. I try to help with this as much as possible and bring my kids there. She is involved with my kids as she can be (much moreso than my in laws even with her work and family responsibilities).

My Dad tried to commit suicide when I was 18 and our relationship never recovered fully. I tend to keep him at arms length. He does enjoy being a grandpa but his love language is gifts definitely not quality time.

It sounds like she's exhausted. Its a bit different if she were retired, like mine. But, if she's working full time and an hour commute, that's not reasonable to expect her at night. And, if she's caring for her parents on the weekend, that's a lot of work. At least she's trying.

Anonymous wrote:So you know that your husband's family has a different attitude and traditions for how grandparents interact with grandchildren, and you've decided to take it personally that they don't have the one you had? Nothing about what you wrote tells me that your in-laws are "indifferent" to your kids, only that they don't want or have the kind of interaction you want. And you are making it into a personal rejection, even though it's probably just how they are and how they were raised. Stop comparing them to other people, and figure out how to work with what you've got.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get over it. Seriously. They are your kids. You decided to have them. Grandparents are not obligated to be built in babysitters. They don’t have to keep living near you. You don’t own them just because they raised your husband.

Ignore this poster op. Typical miserable internet dwelling dysfunctional keyboard warrior response. Hope you feel better about yourself soon pp.

I get it. I don't know if a lot of people had the great experience you did with your grandparents - I wish we all could. Your grandparents are wonderful and I'm glad to know they are still around making the world a better place. You feelings are valid. It is sad when your family are disinterested in your lives. Your ils sound kind of awful. It has to hurt that they ignore the love you are sending especially if it comes from your kids. I'm sorry your family is dealing with this but as everyone has said, you can't change them. Your kids get the gift of love your grandparents gave you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 on I see you mentioning your grandparents, but not your parents, OP.

What’s their role? Then I’ll comment.

OP here. My parents are divorced. My Mom still works full time and has an hour commute on either end so we don't see her much on weekdays. On weekends, it's her shift to take care of my grandparents. I try to help with this as much as possible and bring my kids there. She is involved with my kids as she can be (much moreso than my in laws even with her work and family responsibilities).

My Dad tried to commit suicide when I was 18 and our relationship never recovered fully. I tend to keep him at arms length. He does enjoy being a grandpa but his love language is gifts definitely not quality time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 on I see you mentioning your grandparents, but not your parents, OP.

What’s their role? Then I’ll comment.

OP here. My parents are divorced. My Mom still works full time and has an hour commute on either end so we don't see her much on weekdays. On weekends, it's her shift to take care of my grandparents. I try to help with this as much as possible and bring my kids there. She is involved with my kids as she can be (much moreso than my in laws even with her work and family responsibilities).

My Dad tried to commit suicide when I was 18 and our relationship never recovered fully. I tend to keep him at arms length. He does enjoy being a grandpa but his love language is gifts definitely not quality time.

Anonymous wrote:+1 on I see you mentioning your grandparents, but not your parents, OP.

What’s their role? Then I’ll comment.

Anonymous wrote:Get over it. Seriously. They are your kids. You decided to have them. Grandparents are not obligated to be built in babysitters. They don’t have to keep living near you. You don’t own them just because they raised your husband.

Anonymous wrote:So you know that your husband's family has a different attitude and traditions for how grandparents interact with grandchildren, and you've decided to take it personally that they don't have the one you had? Nothing about what you wrote tells me that your in-laws are "indifferent" to your kids, only that they don't want or have the kind of interaction you want. And you are making it into a personal rejection, even though it's probably just how they are and how they were raised. Stop comparing them to other people, and figure out how to work with what you've got.

Anonymous wrote:Get over it. Seriously. They are your kids. You decided to have them. Grandparents are not obligated to be built in babysitters. They don’t have to keep living near you. You don’t own them just because they raised your husband.

Anonymous wrote:Get over it. Seriously. They are your kids. You decided to have them. Grandparents are not obligated to be built in babysitters. They don’t have to keep living near you. You don’t own them just because they raised your husband.