Anonymous
Post 11/20/2021 06:26     Subject: Re:Nanny with their own kids coming?
Anonymous wrote:I’m always baffled that people are willing to entertain this set up. A daycare teacher having her own child in the classroom would be an absolute nonstarter at most reputable daycare centers due to the potential for favoritism/conflict of interests and yet people paying significantly more for private care seem to often be willing to entertain the idea…even when they have ample alternatives and little to no financial incentive. When push comes to shove the nanny clearly loves her own child more than yours so why would you put them in a situation where they will always be second fiddle with their caregiver?


Agreed. I can’t imagine paying the full time nanny rate for a nanny share. I can’t afford a nanny but I would be really annoyed if there was another kid at my kid’s private piano lessons, or private tutoring. There’s no way I would entertain this. It nullifies so many benefits of having a nanny.
Anonymous
Post 11/20/2021 00:43     Subject: Nanny with their own kids coming?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Totally fine


+1. I’m a sahm and I have 3 kids. It’s busy but I’m not sure why people are acting like this is some impossible task to care for all of them.


You are caring for your kids. She is an employee. If she is charging less for a share, its fine but not full price.
Anonymous
Post 11/20/2021 00:11     Subject: Nanny with their own kids coming?
Imagine allllllll the times the nanny will call out due to her own kids sick days, doc appointments, school appointments. I think having a young single nanny would be better.
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 23:32     Subject: Nanny with their own kids coming?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Totally fine


+1. I’m a sahm and I have 3 kids. It’s busy but I’m not sure why people are acting like this is some impossible task to care for all of them.


You have 3 kids under 3?
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 23:32     Subject: Nanny with their own kids coming?
Anonymous wrote:So I actually do do this. I have 3 kids: 1,2, and 4 and she has a 3 year old. We’ve done it a year so far and it’s worked out great. They are all boys and play well together, of course she loves her own child the most but she takes great care of all of them and is a responsible caregiver. It’s not as though she is snatching toys out of my kids’ hands and giving them to her son.

Others have brought this up, though, the kids really just hang out at the house and at nearby parks. Our oldest attends preschool part of the day but they don’t ever use the car.


I'm assuming you get $1300 / month for this arrangement?
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 23:30     Subject: Nanny with their own kids coming?
Anonymous wrote:Totally fine


+1. I’m a sahm and I have 3 kids. It’s busy but I’m not sure why people are acting like this is some impossible task to care for all of them.
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 23:20     Subject: Re:Nanny with their own kids coming?
Anonymous wrote:I’m always baffled that people are willing to entertain this set up. A daycare teacher having her own child in the classroom would be an absolute nonstarter at most reputable daycare centers due to the potential for favoritism/conflict of interests and yet people paying significantly more for private care seem to often be willing to entertain the idea…even when they have ample alternatives and little to no financial incentive. When push comes to shove the nanny clearly loves her own child more than yours so why would you put them in a situation where they will always be second fiddle with their caregiver?


We’ve done this. It was significantly less expensive than sending our kids to daycare where they would get significantly less individual attention.
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 23:17     Subject: Re:Nanny with their own kids coming?
We have allowed this and it worked out well but the nanny’s kids were always older (like ages 7-13) and ended up being little helpers. I think it will be hard to make this work, and would consider it only if the nanny was otherwise exceptional or your options are very limited.
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 22:52     Subject: Nanny with their own kids coming?
So I actually do do this. I have 3 kids: 1,2, and 4 and she has a 3 year old. We’ve done it a year so far and it’s worked out great. They are all boys and play well together, of course she loves her own child the most but she takes great care of all of them and is a responsible caregiver. It’s not as though she is snatching toys out of my kids’ hands and giving them to her son.

Others have brought this up, though, the kids really just hang out at the house and at nearby parks. Our oldest attends preschool part of the day but they don’t ever use the car.
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 22:22     Subject: Re:Nanny with their own kids coming?
I’m always baffled that people are willing to entertain this set up. A daycare teacher having her own child in the classroom would be an absolute nonstarter at most reputable daycare centers due to the potential for favoritism/conflict of interests and yet people paying significantly more for private care seem to often be willing to entertain the idea…even when they have ample alternatives and little to no financial incentive. When push comes to shove the nanny clearly loves her own child more than yours so why would you put them in a situation where they will always be second fiddle with their caregiver?
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 22:06     Subject: Re:Nanny with their own kids coming?
No way. If this were an in home daycare the price would be $1500/month and let me guess this Nanny doesn't want that pay scale? Fair offer? Her desired salary minus $2700 / month because that's her share of the childcare arrangement lol.
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 22:01     Subject: Re:Nanny with their own kids coming?
It’s telling that the nannies are weighing in to claim how great the situation is whereas others are warning against it.
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 21:59     Subject: Re:Nanny with their own kids coming?
No, OP. Your child will be the odd man out and that’s crushing to his/her spirit. Do not do this. Your child deserves better.
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 18:19     Subject: Re:Nanny with their own kids coming?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I worked as a nanny for a few years for a family with one child. My DD was about a year younger than their DS. Everything worked out well. They knew they were only having one child and liked the idea of a playmate. They had the same schedule so it worked out well. They did buy a double stroller which we used a lot for walks. They gave me a car seat which I kept in my car all of the time unless the grandparents visited and wanted to take the child somewhere.


Plus 1

People love when i bring my daughter to a babysitting job. A playmate bonus.


What if the family already has playmates in mind that they want the nanny to do playdates with?


Exactly. My kids have a big neighborhood friend group. I would be annoyed if the nanny couldn’t handle play dates with my kids friends because her child was there.
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 17:34     Subject: Nanny with their own kids coming?
I would worry that they kids would not get along. Maybe they are so little it is not an issue though. 5 year old Larla might not be happy to spend all day with 4 year old Peter and be expected to share all of her things all the time.