Anonymous
Post 12/18/2021 10:11     Subject: I am just so burnt out
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I thought it was typical of nannies to clean up after their charges, and manage their clothing and food. $25 per hour seems very typical around here. Especially if the kids are older.


I think most nannies help with these tasks. I do them 100%

Before I leave on Fridays I make all their food for the weekend. I arrive on Monday to find all the toys and boys that they used over the weekend left for me. I do 100% of the kids’ laundry. I also do all the parents’ dishes during the week. I even make breakfast and lunch for the parents (I pack them lunches every day). I am the one who reads all the school emails and volunteers and makes sure the kids have the supplies they need and signs up for conferences and afterschool activities and schedules doctor and dentist appointments and fills out school health forms and buys birthday gifts for their friends and write thank-you notes from the kids to grandma and on and on. Basically any aspect of parenting other than paying for stuff is my job.


What shit parents
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2021 11:46     Subject: I am just so burnt out
I think you should try to get joint custody of those children. You are more of a parent than they are.
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2021 10:44     Subject: I am just so burnt out
The parents micro manage (although they don't see it that way I bet) bc they want to feel involved and have some sense of tangible household control to compensate for the fact they're never around (you said only 20 hrs/week they see the kids?). Not condoning it, but just saying it's not a personal attack on you. It's just a very common mentality of workaholic disengaged parents who rely on the nanny way more than they should.

Feeling burnt out is typical in any industry.

Have you taken any days off for yourself? What do you do in the hours while the kids are in school and after light house pickup? In theory, you should have a chunk of consecutive hours to recharge and do what you feel like, no?

Are you a live-in nanny by chance?
Anonymous
Post 12/01/2021 10:33     Subject: I am just so burnt out
$25/hour for school aged kids and light housekeeping does not seem underpaid.
Anonymous
Post 11/19/2021 12:00     Subject: Re:I am just so burnt out
OP time to find another family, or do something different.

Sad but these are sh$t parents, and there are many out there. I saw that when I worked with families as well. It's much easier to find responsible people, and it will make your life a hell of a lot better.
Anonymous
Post 11/18/2021 13:57     Subject: I am just so burnt out
Anonymous wrote:I’m a nanny. I have been with my current family almost 7 years, since the first kid was born. I work a split shift, start the day at 6:30am, and at 8pm. I don’t get paid all the hours in between but I am on call for most of them. I get paid for 55 hours per week. Summers a d holidays (and all through COVID school closures) I work all those hours.

I do everything for the kids: make all their food, schedule all their appointments, do all their laundry, keep their toys tidy, buy all their groceries and buy clothes when they outgrow last season. The parents (between the two of them) see the kids maybe 20 hours over the course of a week—including weekends. They constantly micromanage everything I do and when I told them I was underpaid (I make $25 per hour), they said that all their friends pay their nannies the same—I am sure they do! I am also sure their friends’ nannies are not doing everything that I do. I leave a spotless house Friday nights and arrive home to a mess and then they tell me that I am not organized or tidy. I should just leave and find a job making the same amount with no split shift and fewer duties but I am the kids’ primary caregiver. I wish the parents were interested in seeing how much I do and showing some appreciation.


omgosh leave! it's so hard to find a good nanny. I treat my nanny like gold because she is, and she has been with us for 9 years. another family will pay you and treat you right if you are as good and dedicated as you sound.
Anonymous
Post 11/18/2021 13:54     Subject: Re:I am just so burnt out
I understand exactly how you feel & why you don't want to move on. But I recommend that you do find a new position & do your best to leave on good terms. Also remember the children & you love each other deeply but the parents look at you as nothing more then the hired help. I had to learn this the hard way. I have been nanny for 20 years always stayed with family a long time & when the position came to in end. I always stayed in touch with the family. Then my last position was a nightmare. I loved the children but parents were awful. I worked for them 3& half years. One night I get a call they decided to move in a different direction. I was not allowed to say good bye to their children. I caref for the twins since they were one week old. Twins were 3 years old at the time. My heart is still broken from it. Always do what's best for you bc in the end you have no control in if you will ever see them again. Sorry I know how hard it is.
Anonymous
Post 11/17/2021 13:09     Subject: I am just so burnt out
Before I leave on Fridays I make all their food for the weekend. I arrive on Monday to find all the toys and boys that they used over the weekend left for me. I do 100% of the kids’ laundry. I also do all the parents’ dishes during the week. I even make breakfast and lunch for the parents (I pack them lunches every day). I am the one who reads all the school emails and volunteers and makes sure the kids have the supplies they need and signs up for conferences and afterschool activities and schedules doctor and dentist appointments and fills out school health forms and buys birthday gifts for their friends and write thank-you notes from the kids to grandma and on and on. Basically any aspect of parenting other than paying for stuff is my job.

Why have you agreed to do all these things, especially the bolded? The parents are, of course, lousy parents to leave all this on you, but in the end you as a responsible adult have to take responsibility for your own life. If my boss would tell me to clean the toilets in our office building, which certainly isn't related to my job, I would say: "NYET!", not start scrubbing dutifully.
There's no medal for being the biggest pushover.
Anonymous
Post 11/16/2021 21:48     Subject: I am just so burnt out
You’ll have to leave them eventually. Please take care of yourself.
Anonymous
Post 11/16/2021 20:29     Subject: I am just so burnt out
PP above -- take this vacation during normal times, not when the parents already have time off from work. Don't do any of your organizing work to cover the time that you will be gone. Let them figure all of that out.
Anonymous
Post 11/16/2021 20:27     Subject: I am just so burnt out
I think you need to take a nice long vacation or leave in order to see if you can get this family to properly appreciate you, and if they don't when you get back you should find a new position (or look for a new one while you are out). If you are doing all of this stuff, it should be pretty hard for the mom and dad to fill in for you while you're gone and they should realize everything you are doing that they haven't been paying you for.

Good luck -- I feel for you!
Anonymous
Post 11/16/2021 19:52     Subject: I am just so burnt out
Anonymous wrote:You are not underpaid. Find a new job.


+1. I don't think the pay is the issue. It's a crappy job. You don't want another crappy job that pays more, you want a reasonable work schedule and duties, which you won't get here.
Anonymous
Post 11/16/2021 19:42     Subject: I am just so burnt out
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I thought it was typical of nannies to clean up after their charges, and manage their clothing and food. $25 per hour seems very typical around here. Especially if the kids are older.


I think most nannies help with these tasks. I do them 100%

Before I leave on Fridays I make all their food for the weekend. I arrive on Monday to find all the toys and boys that they used over the weekend left for me. I do 100% of the kids’ laundry. I also do all the parents’ dishes during the week. I even make breakfast and lunch for the parents (I pack them lunches every day). I am the one who reads all the school emails and volunteers and makes sure the kids have the supplies they need and signs up for conferences and afterschool activities and schedules doctor and dentist appointments and fills out school health forms and buys birthday gifts for their friends and write thank-you notes from the kids to grandma and on and on. Basically any aspect of parenting other than paying for stuff is my job.
yikes. You sound like the Mom!


Ok this thread was going great until this. What about Dad here????

Op you sound like an amazing nanny. You should post a throwaway email and let parents here offer you what you are worth. You probably want a job making what you do now hit with just 40 hrs a week and parents who appreciate all you do and will work with you. Good luck to you.
Anonymous
Post 11/16/2021 19:27     Subject: I am just so burnt out
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I thought it was typical of nannies to clean up after their charges, and manage their clothing and food. $25 per hour seems very typical around here. Especially if the kids are older.


I think most nannies help with these tasks. I do them 100%

Before I leave on Fridays I make all their food for the weekend. I arrive on Monday to find all the toys and boys that they used over the weekend left for me. I do 100% of the kids’ laundry. I also do all the parents’ dishes during the week. I even make breakfast and lunch for the parents (I pack them lunches every day). I am the one who reads all the school emails and volunteers and makes sure the kids have the supplies they need and signs up for conferences and afterschool activities and schedules doctor and dentist appointments and fills out school health forms and buys birthday gifts for their friends and write thank-you notes from the kids to grandma and on and on. Basically any aspect of parenting other than paying for stuff is my job.
yikes. You sound like the Mom!
Anonymous
Post 11/16/2021 19:10     Subject: I am just so burnt out
Toys and books I meant to say.