Anonymous
11/09/2021 11:13
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
I cut off about 6 inches of my hair and got a lot of compliments on it.
Then I worked very hard at an out of town conference, 18 hour days, for 5 days, the culmination of months of work.
At the end when we were packing up, the (male) SVP said, (instead of complimenting any of the work I had done), “whatever you do, don’t ever grow out your hair again”.
Basically made me feel like shit. So that’s all that matters is I look pretty at work, instead of all the actual work I did for the project? WTF. I was so exhausted that when I was by myself on the train home I cried.
For context I am in my 40s, not some 23 year old beauty queen. Regardless of my age, he should’ve focused on what I had actually done at work, rather than my looks.
Then I worked very hard at an out of town conference, 18 hour days, for 5 days, the culmination of months of work.
At the end when we were packing up, the (male) SVP said, (instead of complimenting any of the work I had done), “whatever you do, don’t ever grow out your hair again”.
Basically made me feel like shit. So that’s all that matters is I look pretty at work, instead of all the actual work I did for the project? WTF. I was so exhausted that when I was by myself on the train home I cried.
For context I am in my 40s, not some 23 year old beauty queen. Regardless of my age, he should’ve focused on what I had actually done at work, rather than my looks.
Anonymous
11/09/2021 10:26
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
‘We are all a big family’ Told me the boss of the most dysfunctional place I worked for!!!
Anonymous
11/09/2021 10:24
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
Anonymous wrote:"You write English so good"
I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
I would have replied with "Well. I write English so well".
Anonymous
11/09/2021 10:24
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
"Has anyone ever given you a pearl necklace? You're cute and I'd give you a pearl necklace." I was 18 and assisting an investment broker at a new defunct brokerage firm. Used to have a bull as its logo.
Anonymous
11/09/2021 10:20
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
"You write English so good"
I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
Anonymous
11/09/2021 09:50
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:“You’re so articulate” as if they were surprised I’m not a total idiot
This doesn’t sound like a back handed compliment to me. This is just a compliment.
It's a microaggression.
Anonymous
11/09/2021 09:48
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
"Articulate".
I have multiple degrees, have led organizations, and regularly facilitate public speaking events over the last 20 years of my career. WTF were they expecting? Mushmouth from Fat Albert?
I have multiple degrees, have led organizations, and regularly facilitate public speaking events over the last 20 years of my career. WTF were they expecting? Mushmouth from Fat Albert?
Anonymous
11/09/2021 09:46
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
"Wow, you must be really good. We never hire from [insert name of second tier law school]."
Anonymous
11/09/2021 09:46
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
Anonymous wrote:I’ll go first. “I love your energy”
How is this condescending? Is it because you have too much energy and it’s a hint to tone it down?
Anonymous
11/09/2021 09:44
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
It is so cool they hired a female for this role.
Anonymous
11/09/2021 09:08
Subject: Re:What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
“Aww, you’re too nice. We need to teach you to be meaner!”
Anonymous
11/09/2021 09:07
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
"Your work is really creative"
I'm a scientist. Creative sounds like crazy or even "crackpot" to me.
Second place is "I didn't realize you could [do some type of work] " as if the speaker has low expectations, which isn't paranoid as a woman scientist.
I'm a scientist. Creative sounds like crazy or even "crackpot" to me.
Second place is "I didn't realize you could [do some type of work] " as if the speaker has low expectations, which isn't paranoid as a woman scientist.
Anonymous
11/09/2021 09:00
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
"Lady doctor"
"Lady engineers"
"You ladies"
"Lady engineers"
"You ladies"
Anonymous
11/09/2021 08:53
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
Women in the lab are so natural, like being in a kitchen. They just take control and keep everything so organized.
Anonymous
11/09/2021 08:52
Subject: What’s the most condescending work compliment you’ve received?
You speak English so well!