Anonymous wrote:we are only 2 months into the school year and we are already being notified by our 1st grader's teacher that he "makes noise constantly" (drums on the desk, makes popping sound with his mouth) to the point of he has to be taken out of class and walked up and down the hallways by an IA. he's on the older side and we figured he may be bored this year, and it's a long day expected to sit back in person, but this seems way beyond boredom. we've asked him why he makes noise and he says "because I like to" and when we explain it distracts other kids and the teacher can't focus on teaching, he acts like he could not care less. i'm so confused by his lack of empathy because he's a very sensitive child and typically a pleaser.

I don't know what to do other than to send a fidget toy in with him or something in hopes he stops making loud noises. my words don't seem to be getting through to him or he doesn't care about being a problem to the entire class.


has anyone else dealt with this or have any advice? thanks.

Anonymous wrote:Your kid is disruptive, and defiant. Get it under control, stop making excuses for her behavior, it's not because she's smart.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s silly it’s “So distracting” he has to leave. So what he makes noises.

If he's distracting other kids from their work or paying attention to the teacher, then it's a problem.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s silly it’s “So distracting” he has to leave. So what he makes noises.

I don't understand what you're saying. You think the teacher is overreacting?
-OP

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are the mouth noises a tic? I had a child who has pronounced tics at that age that he eventually grew out of. Throat clearing, mouth clicks, etc. He wasn't doing it to be a jerk. Your son may not be as in control as he thinks he is and is just using the obstinance as a cover.

I doubt it's a tic. He would do it even more when he gets home.

I'd tell your child if he keeps making noise, he is going to be sent back to kindergarten. Ask VP if they can try this as a deterrent. Just put him in time out in kindergarten class. Or, take away privileges at home. Ask teacher to message you after school with report of whether he made noise or not.

Fidgeting isn't abnormal for a pandemic 1st grader. I'd let that go.

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s silly it’s “So distracting” he has to leave. So what he makes noises.

Anonymous wrote:Does your son also do this sort of thing at home, or is this just a school thing? Does he do it at the dinner table, when watching TV, building LEGOs, or when playing video games? I would be more concerned if this is something that is happening all the time in all situations.

Even if that is the case, your son might grow out of it, or it could be an early sign of something else like ADHD, although first grade is too early to effectively diagnose this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid a bit like this OP. Very willful. And it becomes a power struggle with the teacher.

I think you can set up a reward system and also if the behavior doesn't improve, set up a consequence he cares about and follow through.

Is this something that has improved with time with your child or are you suspecting something diagnosable? Thank you for the suggestions I’d love to hear more about your experience and what has worked for you.
-OP

I don't suspect anything diagnosable. She can do what she's supposed to in the end. She'd just often rather not because it's more fun to chat with her friends and fool around. She's very social and smart and of course we're never supposed to say this as a reason (and don't say it to the teacher, they don't react well) but she's sometimes bored. She'll say the teacher repeats the same things over and over and she already got it and so then in her mind, she can do whatever she feels like. But of course that doesn't work. At all. Which I explain to her. You're disrupting other people.

I set goals for her and tell her I'm going to check in with the teacher at certain intervals and then if she meets the goal, she gets something she really wants and if she doesn't, something she really doesn't like happens. This motivates her. We work together on the goals, the reward, and the consequence. The consequence should be painful.

I do think your thing could be a tic as others are suggesting or something he can't control. But based on what he's saying to you, not sure.

An eval never hurts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid a bit like this OP. Very willful. And it becomes a power struggle with the teacher.

I think you can set up a reward system and also if the behavior doesn't improve, set up a consequence he cares about and follow through.

Is this something that has improved with time with your child or are you suspecting something diagnosable? Thank you for the suggestions I’d love to hear more about your experience and what has worked for you.
-OP

I don't suspect anything diagnosable. She can do what she's supposed to in the end. She'd just often rather not because it's more fun to chat with her friends and fool around. She's very social and smart and of course we're never supposed to say this as a reason (and don't say it to the teacher, they don't react well) but she's sometimes bored. She'll say the teacher repeats the same things over and over and she already got it and so then in her mind, she can do whatever she feels like. But of course that doesn't work. At all. Which I explain to her. You're disrupting other people.

I set goals for her and tell her I'm going to check in with the teacher at certain intervals and then if she meets the goal, she gets something she really wants and if she doesn't, something she really doesn't like happens. This motivates her. We work together on the goals, the reward, and the consequence. The consequence should be painful.

I do think your thing could be a tic as others are suggesting or something he can't control. But based on what he's saying to you, not sure.

An eval never hurts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid a bit like this OP. Very willful. And it becomes a power struggle with the teacher.

I think you can set up a reward system and also if the behavior doesn't improve, set up a consequence he cares about and follow through.

Is this something that has improved with time with your child or are you suspecting something diagnosable? Thank you for the suggestions I’d love to hear more about your experience and what has worked for you.
-OP

Anonymous wrote:Are the mouth noises a tic? I had a child who has pronounced tics at that age that he eventually grew out of. Throat clearing, mouth clicks, etc. He wasn't doing it to be a jerk. Your son may not be as in control as he thinks he is and is just using the obstinance as a cover.