Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These threads make me so angry and rage cry. I've had a crap day and feel like slapping some of these posters.

My kid has some of these issues. The classroom has been cleared because of him. Do you know what we had to do in order to get him an appropriate placement where he is thriving? I'll tell you:

Thousands upon thousands of dollars of therapy, not including the amount of lost work/salary for me. I don't work anymore because it's too hard to manage.

At least 6 meetings with school a year, daily phone calls, IEP meetings, IEP revisions, FBAs/BIPs, etc. private testing. Daily phone call complaints from incompetent teachers, psychologists who told me "you don't seem to care about your kid (she got fired)," and a whole host of garbage comments from other parents.

Advocate and lawyer to help us through the process.
I had to have therapists who were baiting my child removed from the process after they admitted to baiting him to acting out.

More advocate and lawyer costs to get him into his correct placement, where he's thriving and doing very well.

And he's only in second grade. That's right, all of this and he's 7. This is a lifelong process for us. We'll do it again next year, and the year after, and the year after.

You know what I have to be able to do this: Time and Money. A lot of people don't have time and money to do these things. People can't quit their jobs to go to therapy. People can't pay lawyers and advocates to help them. We can and we're fortunate. I go to Special Ed group meetings near me and people are begging for help--they can't afford it, can't take time off, have trauma in their lives, etc.

Yes, some people ignore the problems until it's too late, or don't want their kid labeled, but I really believe that most people are doing the best they can, and, in some cases, they're relying on the school to help them through the process. You can't rely on them. You need need outside help and assistance and a lot of people can't afford that.

I don't want your kid to get his hand slammed in the door, or to have to evacuate the classroom. IT's not fair to any of the kids. But I also hate that this topic comes up once a week on this site and people don't seem to understand the other side of it. The lack of empathy for people on these threads is disgusting.

So I have an idea for you: Go use your voice to vote for candidates that support all aspects of public education, voice your concerns to your school board and principals, work for additional funding for schools, stop bitching about property taxes on your million dollar homes and then complain that we don't have enough aides for the SN kids. Stop thinking that parents aren't doing the best they can. Find some empathy for people who don't fit in the molds. Life is hard enough.

I have empathy and I feel very badly for you, I really do, but my child has started seeing tutors to help with reading and math because she's basically not being taught these subjects due to being in a class with not one, but two disruptive students and only one teacher and one aide. On top of that, all the attention spent on those kids means that other children are acting up more than normal and my child has a classmate constantly picking on and bothering her, and it has seriously impacted her ability to learn, her level of anxiety, and her love of school. We're also considering sending her to a psychologist to help with the anxiety issues. And yes, I've complained and documented and complained some more but apparently there's nothing the school can do for my child who was doing GREAT for two years before being put in this class with children the teachers can't handle. I really don't think this is fair to my child either, and has potentially long-term impacts on my child's mental health and well-being. You are not the ONLY one suffering.

This has nothing to do with one child. Your child is having tutors as they are struggling and probably also need assessed. Your child having anxiety probably is genetic or also something else going on. If its that bad ,send her to private. You don't get that these parents are doing the best they can and many are not equip to handle these indues and honestly, it doesn't sound like you can if you have to get tutors for a young child vs. working with them AND you are ignoring your child mental health.

Two sides to this and both have legitimate points of view. My child was in a class that was evacuated every few weeks in two different grades. I never even heard about it from her but a few parents mentioned it to me and I saw it happen once while volunteering. Not one of the kids seemed visibly upset. The evacuation was really quick and they just went to another classroom to continue the lesson. This was early elementary so it gave the kids a movement break and they continued with their lesson and were moved back into their classroom in about 5 minutes after another adult was able to come down and help the child who was upset.

DD has a friend with anxiety, and, her parents discovered a few years later, a learning disability. This situation was very difficult for her and the parents initially were in denial and blamed their DD's not being able to learn on the upset child. They did move her to a different classroom but found she was still struggling academically. This was about HER issue, not the other child's issue.

Public school is chaotic my friend and your child will encounter behavioral issues throughout K-12 so if this is making your child struggle you do have a right to bring it up with the administration but just know most students do fine with these disruptions.

Oh, ok, you're absolutely right, MY CHILD is the one who has problems, not PP's. I have the feeling that next year, when DD is in a class full of peers and not constantly evacuated from class and doesn't have shit thrown at her multiple times a week, she'll be doing a lot better. Have YOU ever had a desk thrown at you when you were at work? Multiple times? Threatened with scissors and sharp pencils??? You'd probably be anxious in that case, too. You and PP are real peaches.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:These two posts do t name the “epidemic” to which hey refer... what is the epidemic?

Sounds like they mean mental illness...but they’re being very drama queeny about it.

I think they are antivaxxers. See the infertility reference.

Oh, yeah, you’re probably right.

I said the infertility reference because it's the one thing that people on this board seem to be able to comprehend. People are either pregnant or they're not. You can't be in denial about it and you can't pretend and you can't negotiate and you can't change the definition.

If you're asking whether I think all vaccines are a great idea for all kids in all cases, the answer is no. If you're asking whether some vaccines are a great idea in some cases, the answer is yes. But I (personally) was referring to much more than vaccines.

We have "food scientists" making the food that our kids are eating. And hint: these "scientists" work for the company who employs them, to try to save the company money in every single way possible, NOT for you or your children. Just think about that. Most of it isn't even food anymore.

Both the state of California and the World Health Organization publicly recognize that Roundup causes cancer and yet we're still allowing it to be sprayed it in our schools and parks and neighborhood gardens.

Our kids are sitting in front of screens when they're at home and now they're sitting in front of screens at school too because it's apparently the way most schools have decided it's easier to control the kids (big surprise). Nobody cares that studies have shown that the more that kids are exposed to screens, the lower their attention spans get.

I could go on and on. There are a ton of issues. I'm happy to start anywhere. But just being in denial about everything is not helping anyone.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These two posts do t name the “epidemic” to which hey refer... what is the epidemic?

Sounds like they mean mental illness...but they’re being very drama queeny about it.

I think they are antivaxxers. See the infertility reference.

Oh, yeah, you’re probably right.

I said the infertility reference because it's the one thing that people on this board seem to be able to comprehend. People are either pregnant or they're not. You can't be in denial about it and you can't pretend and you can't negotiate and you can't change the definition.

If you're asking whether I think all vaccines are a great idea for all kids in all cases, the answer is no. If you're asking whether some vaccines are a great idea in some cases, the answer is yes. But I (personally) was referring to much more than vaccines.

We have "food scientists" making the food that our kids are eating. And hint: these "scientists" work for the company who employs them, to try to save the company money in every single way possible, NOT for you or your children. Just think about that. Most of it isn't even food anymore.

Both the state of California and the World Health Organization publicly recognize that Roundup causes cancer and yet we're still allowing it to be sprayed it in our schools and parks and neighborhood gardens.

Our kids are sitting in front of screens when they're at home and now they're sitting in front of screens at school too because it's apparently the way most schools have decided it's easier to control the kids (big surprise). Nobody cares that studies have shown that the more that kids are exposed to screens, the lower their attention spans get.

I could go on and on. There are a ton of issues. I'm happy to start anywhere. But just being in denial about everything is not helping anyone.

Anonymous wrote:I think the elephant in the room is that schools went too far with the inclusion model and it's becoming obvious that some kids really, really cannot function well in Gen Ed, even with a lot of extra supports.

Anonymous wrote:I think the elephant in the room is that schools went too far with the inclusion model and it's becoming obvious that some kids really, really cannot function well in Gen Ed, even with a lot of extra supports.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These two posts do t name the “epidemic” to which hey refer... what is the epidemic?

Sounds like they mean mental illness...but they’re being very drama queeny about it.

I think they are antivaxxers. See the infertility reference.

Oh, yeah, you’re probably right.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another teacher here. I can tell you when parents start calling meeting with admin and making it clear a kid in class is having huge impact, that’s when they address it. Make clear the teacher is doing what they can but your son is still impacted negatively. I have seen this myself; we as teachers can’t do anything about their placement even if we say it’s impacting the other kids but when you get 3-4 parents getting loud about it, it moves the needle.

OP here. This is possibly what got this child moved into a new classroom—parents in his original classroom going to admin. Did not consider that before. So what do they do: just move kids with extreme behavior disruptions from classroom to classroom as infinitum? Why doesn’t a child who needs this much help regulating impulses and emotions have an aide? This must be such drain on teachers and also no real help to the child.

Why doesn't a child who needs this much help have an aide? 1) If a child is new to a school with no paperwork from an old school, new to the country or most often, new to school in general in kindergarten, a school cannot hold a domain meeting requesting an evaluation for 45 school days. 2) A crap ton of documentation and RTI has to happen before most evaluations will happen. 3) A 1:1 aide in a gen ed room, in my school at least, is considered the MOST restrictive environment, even more so than say being placed in an ED/BD room, that is possible. So schools don't like to use that option. 4) Aides are expensive. Districts don't like to pay for them 5) It is VERY difficult to find an aide to work with some of the kids who need them. When that aide has to follow a detailed BIP or crisis plan, it takes tremendous patience. It can also mean that aide putting themself in harm's way each day. How many people are just dying to get paid $11 an hour and get spit on or kicked? And then add in if you have a district that just doesn't want to deal with all this for one reason or the other? It means the kid in question doesn't get the help they need, the other kids and the staff suffers and it is a lose-lose situation.

OP here. I didn't know any of this--thank you. I didn't realize how hard it is for a child to be assigned an aide and how hard it is to find one. What is the answer here? A teacher already stretched thin with the demands of a full classroom, plus at least one or two kids whose needs and behavior dominate their attention--that feels terribly unfair to the teacher, the kids who need the extra assistance, and the rest of the class. My kid says the outburts are loud, sudden, and last a long time--he's on edge waiting for it, even when it isn't happening. I wonder how many other kids in the class feel the same? Not to mention all the hours of instruction interrupted.

Its life in public school. Not all kids are as perfect as yours. Most kids who need attention and supports don't get it and many of us pay a fortune privately in services or have to hire advocates or attorneys and basically sue. You can always transfer to a private.

He is not perfect. But he is also not throwing books across the room at other children and screaming daily at the top of his lungs while he kicks chairs. I don't have money for private school; is it unreasonable to expect that his needs are as important as any other child's?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These two posts do t name the “epidemic” to which hey refer... what is the epidemic?

Sounds like they mean mental illness...but they’re being very drama queeny about it.

I think they are antivaxxers. See the infertility reference.