Anonymous
02/17/2020 09:28
Subject: Never Been Married- 45 Year Old Woman
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I’m mid-40s and have never been married. I’ve been in a relationship for the last 10 years, but the idea of a legal marriage has never been important to me.
Hahahahahaha. You're married, paper or no paper, legal or not, that is effectively a marriage, no matter how much you bleat otherwise.
Except if she SAYS that, then the harpies come down on her for not actually being married. There's no winning with you people. Should a couple dare to live together as any married couple would, have kids, co-own homes, have joint bank accounts, have paperwork for insurance policies and power of attorney...that's still a problem for some people who for whatever reason (I don't really care what it is, you're annoying regardless of why you care so much) are hung up on the legality.
Yeah, this. People lose their sh*t if you even dare draw any parallels between your relationship and a marriage. Doesn't matter if they've been together 3 years and you 10, if you do not have that paper, you have no idea what it is like to be married and your relationship is not serious.
It seems to have worked for Goldie and Kurt.
Anonymous
02/17/2020 09:09
Subject: Never Been Married- 45 Year Old Woman
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You, of course, being divorced with children, are quite the prize, right?
Yes, I am.
dp than why are you divorced if you are?
Different 52yo divorced man here. But people divorce for all kinds of reasons. Doesn’t mean he isn’t a catch. It takes two to make a marriage work.
By definition, a divorced man is never a catch, he's a fail. Sorry.
So I’m a fail because my ex wife basically went nuts? And apparently she was hiding it all along?
Yes I would say that is correct. I think if your wife suffered mental illness you should have supported her not abandoned her. That's a major fail.
NP here.
You can’t stay and support someone who acts like she wants to be single. It takes two to make it work, and sometimes you have to leave a disastrous situation.
And you're NP not Op? How on god's earth do you know these were the circs? You simply cannot know.
I wrote “sometimes”, in reply to someone who seemed to claim to know the circumstances. However I do have experience with a mentally ill spouse, and a marriage license is not a suicide pact. You can’t stay with someone under all circumstances.
Anonymous
02/17/2020 09:03
Subject: Never Been Married- 45 Year Old Woman
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If you have kids, you will have more luck dating women who already have kids. The only never married 45+ woman who will want to date you will be one who wishes she had been able to be a mother.
It's tough dating women who never had kids, when you have them. That is a huge thing to not have in common, or expect her to understand how they will always come before her.
Women who have their own kids behave no better, I have discovered.
If you don't like women with or without kids, it sounds like there are no women out there for you.
What works best are women without kids who are very smart and compassionate. They understand and cooperate with my child-rearing efforts. They are also very rare.
Anonymous
02/16/2020 21:33
Subject: Never Been Married- 45 Year Old Woman
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I’m mid-40s and have never been married. I’ve been in a relationship for the last 10 years, but the idea of a legal marriage has never been important to me.
Hahahahahaha. You're married, paper or no paper, legal or not, that is effectively a marriage, no matter how much you bleat otherwise.
Except if she SAYS that, then the harpies come down on her for not actually being married. There's no winning with you people. Should a couple dare to live together as any married couple would, have kids, co-own homes, have joint bank accounts, have paperwork for insurance policies and power of attorney...that's still a problem for some people who for whatever reason (I don't really care what it is, you're annoying regardless of why you care so much) are hung up on the legality.
Yeah, this. People lose their sh*t if you even dare draw any parallels between your relationship and a marriage. Doesn't matter if they've been together 3 years and you 10, if you do not have that paper, you have no idea what it is like to be married and your relationship is not serious.
Anonymous
02/16/2020 20:36
Subject: Never Been Married- 45 Year Old Woman
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You, of course, being divorced with children, are quite the prize, right?
Yes, I am.
dp than why are you divorced if you are?
Different 52yo divorced man here. But people divorce for all kinds of reasons. Doesn’t mean he isn’t a catch. It takes two to make a marriage work.
By definition, a divorced man is never a catch, he's a fail. Sorry.
A fail to you. Most mature adults realize that life happens and so does divorce.
Marriages do not fail. The people in the marriage fail. Its called shifting responsibility or avoiding it.
Anonymous
02/16/2020 20:35
Subject: Never Been Married- 45 Year Old Woman
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You, of course, being divorced with children, are quite the prize, right?
Yes, I am.
dp than why are you divorced if you are?
Different 52yo divorced man here. But people divorce for all kinds of reasons. Doesn’t mean he isn’t a catch. It takes two to make a marriage work.
By definition, a divorced man is never a catch, he's a fail. Sorry.
So I’m a fail because my ex wife basically went nuts? And apparently she was hiding it all along?
Yes I would say that is correct. I think if your wife suffered mental illness you should have supported her not abandoned her. That's a major fail.
NP here.
You can’t stay and support someone who acts like she wants to be single. It takes two to make it work, and sometimes you have to leave a disastrous situation.
And you're NP not Op? How on god's earth do you know these were the circs? You simply cannot know.
Anonymous
02/16/2020 15:34
Subject: Never Been Married- 45 Year Old Woman
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I’m mid-40s and have never been married. I’ve been in a relationship for the last 10 years, but the idea of a legal marriage has never been important to me.
Hahahahahaha. You're married, paper or no paper, legal or not, that is effectively a marriage, no matter how much you bleat otherwise.
Except if she SAYS that, then the harpies come down on her for not actually being married. There's no winning with you people. Should a couple dare to live together as any married couple would, have kids, co-own homes, have joint bank accounts, have paperwork for insurance policies and power of attorney...that's still a problem for some people who for whatever reason (I don't really care what it is, you're annoying regardless of why you care so much) are hung up on the legality.
Anonymous
02/16/2020 15:34
Subject: Never Been Married- 45 Year Old Woman
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I’m mid-40s and have never been married. I’ve been in a relationship for the last 10 years, but the idea of a legal marriage has never been important to me.
Hahahahahaha. You're married, paper or no paper, legal or not, that is effectively a marriage, no matter how much you bleat otherwise.
I would call this one foot out the door.
Anonymous
02/16/2020 15:32
Subject: Never Been Married- 45 Year Old Woman
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If you have kids, you will have more luck dating women who already have kids. The only never married 45+ woman who will want to date you will be one who wishes she had been able to be a mother.
It's tough dating women who never had kids, when you have them. That is a huge thing to not have in common, or expect her to understand how they will always come before her.
Women who have their own kids behave no better, I have discovered.
If you don't like women with or without kids, it sounds like there are no women out there for you.