Anonymous wrote:Apparently some of you have a hard time facing the truth.

Hard to even know what side you’re arguing.

Anonymous wrote:I have a 2 very athletic children, 1 not so sporty, and the 1 athletes eventually went D1, could have easily done D3.

By proximity we have a very large amount of friends who are in the same situation.

One thing I learned going through the process is that parents with non-sporty kids can not contain their jealousy.

Each of us tries our hardest to only talk to each other about the commitment process and playing in college. Our true friends are happy for us and a few just very nice wonderful people, but generally there is a ton of vitriol around athletic recruits.

I advise parents of up and coming athletes to only talk to parents in a similar situation and every time they branch out, they feel the hate.

This.

Some athletes aren't great at academics, but many are outstanding. Not too long ago, I met a kid at an Ivy graduation who got some academic prizes. He was also in talks with several pro franchises in a sport that I know something about, so we chatted about that. He's now a professional athlete and an Ivy grad. Some people are good at lots of things. It's like great actors who can also sing, dance and do standup.

Kids who are good at sports also frequently hear how "naturally talented" they are -- everything is due to talent, nothing is due to hard work. My kid heard all the time how lucky he was to be genetically gifted from people who didn't know him back before he did a bunch of work and became so naturally talented and genetically gifted. They also didn't see him chocking down food that he didn't want because coaches told him to gain weight -- they just said he was genetically gifted to be strong/fast/big etc.

Apparently some of you have a hard time facing the truth.

Anonymous wrote:Get a life, OP.

This sums it up.

And you'll be working for these kids someday, because EQ means far more.

Maybe they should stop touring the Ivies and top SLACs while pretending they’re on recruiting visits. After, you almost feel bad for the kid when they end up at a no-name private college or regional public. Also, for those wondering, “crummy” private colleges generally have endowments of less than $100 to 150 million.

While I have no doubt there are some schools who compromise to get athletes into their school, I also know that some of the athletes are fantastic students who used athletics as a hook to get into a good school. I see no problem with that, whatsoever.

When you rave about your C student getting into Notre Dame because of softball, it draws as much attention to their academic shortcoming as it does to their athletic strengths. So while you may think you're highlighting their prowess, you're also reminding people of the other side of the coin.

Just shut your trap and post it on fb for your stupid friends to see.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are many student athletes who straight up quit the first year. Your child has to absolutely live for that sport 24/7 and not want to get an insanely tough BA degree. Even D3 schools make it hard with labs. And on top of every day 2-3 hour practices and your own classes, you have mandatory study sessions, team meetings, etc... Your weekends are traveling or playing, never relaxing or socializing. There is not much time for other clubs and college outings. It isn’t a one season sport either. Even D3 plays Fall and Spring. Winter workouts with team captains in winter.

My daughter chose an engineering degree at a college she loved over playing her sport D3 in a few colleges she wasn’t crazy about. And it was hard meeting teams/coaches she loved, but wasn’t crazy about the school. Or finding a great school and not jiving with the team. She ended up at a top engineering school and plays her club sport and IM co-ed volleyball. It is the best of both worlds. And event makes a very tight schedule.

...for her. Many others love their colleges and their sports experience. Many other factual errors above but you don’t seem willing to listen so whatever.

This was my first post. WTF are you talking about. Kudos to student athletes who find the perfect team, school, and degree in one college experience. My point is that it is hard and you have to want to play the sport, but also be at a college you want, earning a degree you really want. Otherwise you should give the right thing up. For my daughter it was the sport. She played her entire life, but nothing seemed to fit when looking at colleges. We had coaches check her off after she said what she wanted to go to school for. Many dictate exactly what classes you start at. Even D3 stem schools, She has done all Calc courses in high school, but coach said “the team starts at Calc 1 no matter what. Makes it easier for your first season.” It was a turn off for her. Even by the end of high school, she was choosing summer internships over travel sport anyway. Couldn’t do both.

Many kids choose the sport over the best college or degree for them. That is fine too. Their love for the game outweighs everything else and they make it great. My daughter figured out pretty quickly when most kids in her sport were in “easy” degrees that it wasn’t for her. Many kids get into a great school because of the sport too. All the power to them. It is a personal choice for each family. But you have to want to play all of the time. It has to be the stress relief, not causing stress. Because it is harder in college than high school. I don’t think many are prepared for that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am confused: Are we supposed to hate these parents and their kids when they get into a good college or are we supposed to hate them when they get into a "shitty" college?

I am just trying to learn from other posters when to hate other families since it does not come to me naturally. This thread has me confused about that. Thanks in advance!

You brought hate into it. Pretty telling.

No I didn't, I read many posts that sounded hateful to me, including the OP. I don't get hate so I need this all explained to me so I can do it properly like the others in this thread.

Anonymous wrote:I am confused: Are we supposed to hate these parents and their kids when they get into a good college or are we supposed to hate them when they get into a "shitty" college?

I am just trying to learn from other posters when to hate other families since it does not come to me naturally. This thread has me confused about that. Thanks in advance!

You brought hate into it. Pretty telling.

Get a life, OP.

I am confused: Are we supposed to hate these parents and their kids when they get into a good college or are we supposed to hate them when they get into a "shitty" college?

I am just trying to learn from other posters when to hate other families since it does not come to me naturally. This thread has me confused about that. Thanks in advance!

Anonymous wrote:Not a fan of OP’s approach but I’ve certainly encountered the “junior’s talking to Princeton” smugness that generally doesn’t result in junior going to Princeton. I usually find it funny but occasionally grating, and in the latter case I’ll admit to a teeny weeny little bit of satisfaction when it goes sideways. I’ve also encountered kids making college choices almost exclusively on the sport, which seems like a terrible idea.

But many of these kids really want to have that college sports experience and the instant friend group it provides. I’d also argue that while OP may never have heard of the schools in question it might be a dream school for that kid. When my daughter says Colby or Kenyon, two she really likes and where she’s hoping to play sports, she gets the who/what/where look. I’m sure those people think we are just trying to justify all the sports time and expense but it simply isn’t true.

I have the same take on it as you. I think most people react negatively to anyone who is smug or braggy about their kid for any reason, and it’s human nature (if not a particularly nice facet of human nature) to see that type of parent taken down a peg. But as recent PPs have noted, there is indeed a lot of anti-athlete animus on DCUM and in real life in communities that care strongly about the prestige factor when selecting colleges. That type of person—and I expect OP is one of them—actively roots against athletes and their families even when the families in question are down to earth and never brag.

OP, I think you need to question what it is to you. Oh, and get some real problems.

You have no idea if the athlete has lower test scores.

Any acceptance is exciting and I don’t judge those who share.