Anonymous wrote:I am a WOHM, and SAHMs don't bother me one bit. What is annoying is all the husbands of the SAHMs at work who make comments about how they would never trust a daycare/nanny with their children, when they know that most of the women in our office are mothers in dual-career families.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s funny is that childless working women usually turn on working moms. I work in finance and 9/10 female senior exes are childless and they do NOTcare if you have a kid that needs to be picked up at a certain time or is sick, etc. Where’s your rah rah feminism then huh?

My Not for profit was the same.

I'm thinking this must be misplaced insecurity. It's like people forget we were all children at some point.

It’s jealousy. I know a woman in a high up position and she refuses to meet my child and said i shouldn’t be pregnant again with a brat. Then over dinner proudly recounted how she told a working mom to shut up because nobody is interested in her children when her team was getting drinks. There are tons of bitter women like that.

I’m currently staying home, but I don’t think so. Some people don’t want kids, don’t like kids, and don’t want to hear about them. I don’t have a problem with that. I just want both working parents to have support from the workplace.

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Anonymous wrote:I never jump into these stupid debates and did not read the prior posts, but for this one I have to, because the OP betrays the total ignorance about history, women's rights, and the role of women in society.

It is not just about what you, Cindy Lou, decide to do with your career once you have kids. It's about the bigger picture, and the fact that when women are not able to, for various reasons, combine career with family, or when we collectively as a society start to spin a narrative that children are hurt when women work, then women feel pressured to drop out, or guilted into dropping out, or forced into it, and then women (and children) suffer the consequences, for example:

-when you have only male OB/GYNs who force you into c-sections and many other procedures because of a lack of understanding or care for what women face
-when there is less money given in the budget process of government to education, or protection for families, because men typically value these things less
-- when you get no paid maternity leave because CEOs are all men and so are the legislators
-- when scientists run studies only on male subjects because they assume women are the same
-- when rape kids go untouched because it's simply not a priority for police departments (mostly male)
-when you have no access to birth control because male legislators don't value it

I could go on and on. All of the above is part of our history and was part of our reality for hundreds/thousands of years. This is why women have fought to be in the workplace. So when SAHMs start talking about "who cares when women aren't part of the workforce," well that is just completely stupid.

Mic drop, girl. And this is the fundamental issue I have with SAHMs. They are so freaking selfish and narrow-minded. THIS IS WHAT THE WOMEN WHO CAME BEFORE US FOUGHT FOR. but they can’t see the societal consequences (which you so brilliantly outlined).

Eye roll. This feminist crap makes me ill.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s funny is that childless working women usually turn on working moms. I work in finance and 9/10 female senior exes are childless and they do NOTcare if you have a kid that needs to be picked up at a certain time or is sick, etc. Where’s your rah rah feminism then huh?

My Not for profit was the same.

I'm thinking this must be misplaced insecurity. It's like people forget we were all children at some point.

It’s jealousy. I know a woman in a high up position and she refuses to meet my child and said i shouldn’t be pregnant again with a brat. Then over dinner proudly recounted how she told a working mom to shut up because nobody is interested in her children when her team was getting drinks. There are tons of bitter women like that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s funny is that childless working women usually turn on working moms. I work in finance and 9/10 female senior exes are childless and they do NOTcare if you have a kid that needs to be picked up at a certain time or is sick, etc. Where’s your rah rah feminism then huh?

My Not for profit was the same.

I'm thinking this must be misplaced insecurity. It's like people forget we were all children at some point.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s funny is that childless working women usually turn on working moms. I work in finance and 9/10 female senior exes are childless and they do NOTcare if you have a kid that needs to be picked up at a certain time or is sick, etc. Where’s your rah rah feminism then huh?

My Not for profit was the same.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s funny is that childless working women usually turn on working moms. I work in finance and 9/10 female senior exes are childless and they do NOTcare if you have a kid that needs to be picked up at a certain time or is sick, etc. Where’s your rah rah feminism then huh?

My Not for profit was the same.

Anonymous wrote:I am a wohm. I admit that it’s a constant struggle between wanting to spend time with kids but also working. I want both! I spent so many years in school and am excited about my career. I also love my kids! I look for flexible jobs that will allow me to be home early to pick them up from preschool.

I sometimes feel guilty when sahms say, “i want to be there for my kids,” “family first,” “i could never send them to daycare/nanny,” “can’t trust anyone,” etc.

At work, I feel bad for having to draw the line and say I can’t do certain things bc of my kids.

It would be amazing if the sahms and wohms, non parents - EVERYONE- understood that raising good kids is a benefit to society. If that means wohms who have more flexible schedules offer other wohms to carpool more or sahms offer to help the wahms bc they have more time, that would be great! Employers understanding that parents (not just moms) need flexibility is amaing. We need everyone to help each other and not just focus on our nuclear family. If we did this, society would be so mich better off

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also, you seem to forget that civic America used to run on... sah moms! Church groups, league of women voters, all kinds of volunteer organizations, etc. Educated women who had the time and attention to engage with society. Is it really better for society to have every parent scrambling bt work and childcare, with no time for reading, community activism, etc?

I think this is very true, and it would be great if we structured society so that people could have all their necessities covered with one person working full time, or two people working full time, or (gasp) a single person who could take a paid maternity leave. In a world where many of us are hustling harder all the time (and for me that's not so I can have a bigger house or fancier vacation, but so I can pay my rent and have health insurance) does wear away at our family life and at our civic society.

I found this to be a useful book (JHU professor) if anyone else is interested:
https://punctumbooks.com/titles/knocking-the-hustle/

Is this really true? Women have always worked.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also, you seem to forget that civic America used to run on... sah moms! Church groups, league of women voters, all kinds of volunteer organizations, etc. Educated women who had the time and attention to engage with society. Is it really better for society to have every parent scrambling bt work and childcare, with no time for reading, community activism, etc?

I think this is very true, and it would be great if we structured society so that people could have all their necessities covered with one person working full time, or two people working full time, or (gasp) a single person who could take a paid maternity leave. In a world where many of us are hustling harder all the time (and for me that's not so I can have a bigger house or fancier vacation, but so I can pay my rent and have health insurance) does wear away at our family life and at our civic society.

I found this to be a useful book (JHU professor) if anyone else is interested:
https://punctumbooks.com/titles/knocking-the-hustle/

Anonymous wrote:I have been both a WOHM and a SAHM, and the vitriol spewed by the WOHMs is way worse. Not even close.

Anonymous wrote:What’s funny is that childless working women usually turn on working moms. I work in finance and 9/10 female senior exes are childless and they do NOTcare if you have a kid that needs to be picked up at a certain time or is sick, etc. Where’s your rah rah feminism then huh?

Anonymous wrote:What’s funny is that childless working women usually turn on working moms. I work in finance and 9/10 female senior exes are childless and they do NOTcare if you have a kid that needs to be picked up at a certain time or is sick, etc. Where’s your rah rah feminism then huh?