Anonymous
02/25/2019 19:20
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am a 54 YO Mom with a just turned 8 DD. She was our miracle surprise baby after 5 rounds of IVF to get her older brother who is 11. I had her when I was 46–I often think how young I was when her brother was born! I remember the parenting class at VHC in Arlington when he was born—I think I was the youngest mom in attendance at 42!
That doesn't sound too bad but then you do the math and you'll be 64 when she graduates high school? I can't fathom it.
Exactly!
You see all the posts on this forum about "sandwich generation," and you are forcing your child into being in that spot!
So, you're saying no one who replied to the OP should have had kids? What age is the cut off in your world for having a child?
FWIW, older parents tend to be better off financially and can help their children with college and other financial hard knocks that might come their way. And people are living longer regardless of when they have kids -- most people will be sandwiched no matter when they have kids.
Exactly...I am the one who just posted than I am 59 with a 5th grader and can confidently say her college fund is fully funded to attend any out of state college. Same with my older DS. One part of me wishes I had started my family earlier, but it didn't happen that way, so I say better late than never!
Does it concern you that if she waits till the same age to have a child, you will be 98--and most likely will never meet your grandchildren?
I am at peace with the fact that I may never meet my grandchildren. That could be the case even with a younger parent who might die young of breast cancer. Life is like that...unpredictable. If I do meet my grandchildren, I will be grateful.
I am the PP and forgot to mention my grandmother lived to be 104...so there's that.
Anonymous
02/25/2019 18:13
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am a 54 YO Mom with a just turned 8 DD. She was our miracle surprise baby after 5 rounds of IVF to get her older brother who is 11. I had her when I was 46–I often think how young I was when her brother was born! I remember the parenting class at VHC in Arlington when he was born—I think I was the youngest mom in attendance at 42!
That doesn't sound too bad but then you do the math and you'll be 64 when she graduates high school? I can't fathom it.
Exactly!
You see all the posts on this forum about "sandwich generation," and you are forcing your child into being in that spot!
So, you're saying no one who replied to the OP should have had kids? What age is the cut off in your world for having a child?
FWIW, older parents tend to be better off financially and can help their children with college and other financial hard knocks that might come their way. And people are living longer regardless of when they have kids -- most people will be sandwiched no matter when they have kids.
Exactly...I am the one who just posted than I am 59 with a 5th grader and can confidently say her college fund is fully funded to attend any out of state college. Same with my older DS. One part of me wishes I had started my family earlier, but it didn't happen that way, so I say better late than never!
Does it concern you that if she waits till the same age to have a child, you will be 98--and most likely will never meet your grandchildren?
DP: It is what it is. I was 50 with a 5th grader, and if he has kids when I had him, I'll be about 80 ... as was my grandfather when I was born. My grandmother had passed from cancer long before that.
Anonymous
02/25/2019 18:00
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
Anonymous wrote:I'm 51 and my youngest is in fifth grade. I don't sweat the small stuff. I'm a 1970s kid! I climbed 60-foot-tall trees to our fort when I was eight. I'm not going to care if my kid is four feet off the ground at age 10. It's all perspective. Other kids tell me I'm fun because I let them have an extra cookie. Live it up, kid!
While I don't have a blanket prohibition against the free range parenting style, I don't find it cool or cute to be proud of that lifestyle. It also reminds me of another parent I know who brags about her child's tree climbing. Cool, I guess. But when that kid was 60 feet up in MY tree on MY property and I asked her to come down, the child was downright belligerent and the mom dismissed me. Uncool. Repeated interactions like this with similar parents/kids make it hard for me not to see proud free range parents as disrespectful of boundaries, but I know there are exceptions.
And I give kids extra cookies, too.
Anonymous
02/25/2019 17:57
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am a 54 YO Mom with a just turned 8 DD. She was our miracle surprise baby after 5 rounds of IVF to get her older brother who is 11. I had her when I was 46–I often think how young I was when her brother was born! I remember the parenting class at VHC in Arlington when he was born—I think I was the youngest mom in attendance at 42!
That doesn't sound too bad but then you do the math and you'll be 64 when she graduates high school? I can't fathom it.
Exactly!
You see all the posts on this forum about "sandwich generation," and you are forcing your child into being in that spot!
So, you're saying no one who replied to the OP should have had kids? What age is the cut off in your world for having a child?
FWIW, older parents tend to be better off financially and can help their children with college and other financial hard knocks that might come their way. And people are living longer regardless of when they have kids -- most people will be sandwiched no matter when they have kids.
Exactly...I am the one who just posted than I am 59 with a 5th grader and can confidently say her college fund is fully funded to attend any out of state college. Same with my older DS. One part of me wishes I had started my family earlier, but it didn't happen that way, so I say better late than never!
Does it concern you that if she waits till the same age to have a child, you will be 98--and most likely will never meet your grandchildren?
I am at peace with the fact that I may never meet my grandchildren. That could be the case even with a younger parent who might die young of breast cancer. Life is like that...unpredictable. If I do meet my grandchildren, I will be grateful.
Anonymous
02/25/2019 17:54
Subject: Re:How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
I am a hypocrite in that I kind of agree with some of the naysayers I think a much older mom can potentially be sad (not being able to be grandma) BUT my husband is much older than me. We have a 10 year old and he’s 62. I think there is a double standard regarding older fathers. In our specific case his father is 90 and still active. All 4 grandparents lived to their 90s.
Anonymous
02/25/2019 17:49
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am a 54 YO Mom with a just turned 8 DD. She was our miracle surprise baby after 5 rounds of IVF to get her older brother who is 11. I had her when I was 46–I often think how young I was when her brother was born! I remember the parenting class at VHC in Arlington when he was born—I think I was the youngest mom in attendance at 42!
That doesn't sound too bad but then you do the math and you'll be 64 when she graduates high school? I can't fathom it.
Exactly!
You see all the posts on this forum about "sandwich generation," and you are forcing your child into being in that spot!
So, you're saying no one who replied to the OP should have had kids? What age is the cut off in your world for having a child?
FWIW, older parents tend to be better off financially and can help their children with college and other financial hard knocks that might come their way. And people are living longer regardless of when they have kids -- most people will be sandwiched no matter when they have kids.
Exactly...I am the one who just posted than I am 59 with a 5th grader and can confidently say her college fund is fully funded to attend any out of state college. Same with my older DS. One part of me wishes I had started my family earlier, but it didn't happen that way, so I say better late than never!
Does it concern you that if she waits till the same age to have a child, you will be 98--and most likely will never meet your grandchildren?
Anonymous
02/25/2019 16:42
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am a 54 YO Mom with a just turned 8 DD. She was our miracle surprise baby after 5 rounds of IVF to get her older brother who is 11. I had her when I was 46–I often think how young I was when her brother was born! I remember the parenting class at VHC in Arlington when he was born—I think I was the youngest mom in attendance at 42!
That doesn't sound too bad but then you do the math and you'll be 64 when she graduates high school? I can't fathom it.
Exactly!
You see all the posts on this forum about "sandwich generation," and you are forcing your child into being in that spot!
So, you're saying no one who replied to the OP should have had kids? What age is the cut off in your world for having a child?
FWIW, older parents tend to be better off financially and can help their children with college and other financial hard knocks that might come their way. And people are living longer regardless of when they have kids -- most people will be sandwiched no matter when they have kids.
Exactly...I am the one who just posted than I am 59 with a 5th grader and can confidently say her college fund is fully funded to attend any out of state college. Same with my older DS. One part of me wishes I had started my family earlier, but it didn't happen that way, so I say better late than never!
Anonymous
02/25/2019 16:38
Subject: Re:How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
Anonymous wrote:I am early 60’s with a 6th grader.
OK, I had to see if there was anyone older than me. I am a 59 year old mom of a 5th grader. Someone earlier talked about feeling old...and yes I do in the sense that the other moms are clearly from another generation and in some cases the grandparents of my daughter's friends are of my generation. But I have to say that in most cases, I am in better shape than the other moms. So that alone makes me feel a bit better about it!
Anonymous
02/23/2019 09:47
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
I'm 48 and husband is 58 and we have a 10 yr old and an almost 14 yr old.
Anonymous
02/22/2019 06:07
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am a 54 YO Mom with a just turned 8 DD. She was our miracle surprise baby after 5 rounds of IVF to get her older brother who is 11. I had her when I was 46–I often think how young I was when her brother was born! I remember the parenting class at VHC in Arlington when he was born—I think I was the youngest mom in attendance at 42!
That doesn't sound too bad but then you do the math and you'll be 64 when she graduates high school? I can't fathom it.
Exactly!
You see all the posts on this forum about "sandwich generation," and you are forcing your child into being in that spot!
So, you're saying no one who replied to the OP should have had kids? What age is the cut off in your world for having a child?
FWIW, older parents tend to be better off financially and can help their children with college and other financial hard knocks that might come their way. And people are living longer regardless of when they have kids -- most people will be sandwiched no matter when they have kids.
Anonymous
02/21/2019 18:12
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am a 54 YO Mom with a just turned 8 DD. She was our miracle surprise baby after 5 rounds of IVF to get her older brother who is 11. I had her when I was 46–I often think how young I was when her brother was born! I remember the parenting class at VHC in Arlington when he was born—I think I was the youngest mom in attendance at 42!
That doesn't sound too bad but then you do the math and you'll be 64 when she graduates high school? I can't fathom it.
Exactly!
You see all the posts on this forum about "sandwich generation," and you are forcing your child into being in that spot!
Anonymous
02/21/2019 16:10
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
47 (DH is 48) with a Kindergartner (almost 6 years old) and a 2nd Grader (almost 8 years old).
Anonymous
02/20/2019 09:43
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
This will be all my friends in five years or so. Most of them had their kids late 30’s/ early 40’s.
Anonymous
02/20/2019 09:41
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
40 with a 10, 12, and 1 yr old. I’ll miss the 10 and 12 year old when they’ve gone to college as they are so helpful with the youngest right now. She will be 8 when I’m 48, not quite old enough to completely be independent but semi. I hope it’s easy sailing by then
Anonymous
02/20/2019 09:28
Subject: How many people on this forum (50+) with kids in elementary?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I shared this thread with my husband to get his opinions. His father was 40 when husband was born and died when husband was only 32. He misses his dad tremendously and would love it if he were still around. Your kids don’t care if you “traveled, and really got well established in your career” before you decided to have them. They would prefer that you be alive.
The “old parent” movement is just wrong. You people spend thousands and thousands on fertility treatments, drop the kids at daycare, pat yourself on the back for “having it all”, then drop dead when your kids are in their 20s.
Rant over.
You don't know when you are going to 'drop dead'!
I was a youngish parent (21) and had a later life dd (at 43, she's 4 now). One of my younger parent friends, a dad at 23, had a sudden heart attack at 40 and died. You just don't know. Life is always a risk.
My fil had a son in his 40's (he had remarried). I came into the family around this time and people talked about it, saying stuff like oh he won't live to see him grow up, ect. Well, son just married and FIL was there of course, and just last week helped us put up a fence in our backyard. People can say whatever they want but no one knows when they will go.