Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please, God. I hope I never hear my children masturbating. I need to start saving up for sound proofing the entire house. There are still prek so I have some time to either save up or get some therapy to deal with my issues.

Not sure why you would. I never made any noise. My only concern was wondering if they noticed me using the bathroom five times a day for 20 minutes at a time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wife of the guy who didn't pull out when her son jumped into bed with her said she was extremely uncomfortable but didn't pull away. This is what I find the most disturbing about that story -- that in the poster's marriage, apparently she can't exercise her right not to continue with a sex act when she's extremely uncomfortable.

You misrepresenting what she said in order to make it sound more "rapey." She never said that her DH continued after she told him to stop.

Here is the quote:

"4 y.o. DS hopped into bed with us this very morning while DH was inside me. He didn't pull out right away and tried to finish while DS was trying to cuddle up in front of me. I wanted to strangle DH and gave him a horse kick bc he was still slowly pumping away after a minute or two (Yes, door should have been locked). Sex is frequent so he should've stopped right away. DS had no clue, but I was infinitely uncomfortable."


The order of events here:

1. They were having sex.
2. Son jumps into bed, is obviously unaware of what is happening
3. DH continues to "slowly pump away"
4. OP kicks DH to stop
5. DH stops (this is implied)
6. Son was completely unaware that anything was happening.

No one was harmed. No one was "raped." It was just an awkward, and later humorous, situation. I'm so sick of people who needlessly instigate strife and outrage.

I did not use the term rape. I did not say she told him to stop. I said she was uncomfortable (which she said) but did not tell him so. That's the dynamic -- a relationship where a woman goes through very uncomfortable sexual situation without speaking up. I didn't call it rape, but it is unhealthy.

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, I agree PP.

Mrs. Husband Kept Pumping, 'British humor means it's hilar that my son jerked off while I banged his mom, and we bro'd it out' (Graham Chapman come back to life!), and attention ho "I'd gladly nail you, stranger DH!" in this thread are nasty and not in a fun, Prince song, actually sexy kind of way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two of our three kids were conceived over July 4th weekends at my parents summer home. The BR had twin beds sitting on a wooden floor with my parents room directly below. The other upstairs BR's were also full of family. We did our best to be quiet but its hard to imagine that others didn't hear us going at it. Years later when our kids were young adults they figured out when and where they were conceived. They were probably grossed out! I've always like the 4th!

Downstairs they're whispering to each other, "YES! Grandchildren at last!"

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two of our three kids were conceived over July 4th weekends at my parents summer home. The BR had twin beds sitting on a wooden floor with my parents room directly below. The other upstairs BR's were also full of family. We did our best to be quiet but its hard to imagine that others didn't hear us going at it. Years later when our kids were young adults they figured out when and where they were conceived. They were probably grossed out! I've always like the 4th!

Downstairs they're whispering to each other, "YES! Grandchildren at last!"

Anonymous wrote:Two of our three kids were conceived over July 4th weekends at my parents summer home. The BR had twin beds sitting on a wooden floor with my parents room directly below. The other upstairs BR's were also full of family. We did our best to be quiet but its hard to imagine that others didn't hear us going at it. Years later when our kids were young adults they figured out when and where they were conceived. They were probably grossed out! I've always like the 4th!

Anonymous wrote:This thread is definitely not a safe space foe prudes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, I agree PP.

Mrs. Husband Kept Pumping, 'British humor means it's hilar that my son jerked off while I banged his mom, and we bro'd it out' (Graham Chapman come back to life!), and attention ho "I'd gladly nail you, stranger DH!" in this thread are nasty and not in a fun, Prince song, actually sexy kind of way.

How many hours are there in a night?

Is it possible that the son jerked off at a different time, or are you just so bored that you use other people's lives to come up with your sexual fantasies?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you try to be as quiet as possible when you have sex and the kids are in the house, or don't you care if they hear? I remember hearing my parents a lot when I was a kid and didn't think much of it, but a friend was recently asked to keep it down by her teen son and was mortified that he could hear them at night (even though he's only a room away...duh he can hear you...).

If the kids are awake while we are having sex, then we are quiet. Sometimes in the middle of the day, we do it in the master shower, but on occasion one of our kids had started banging on tbr bathroom door demanding that we mediate a fight over the xbox. If the kids are asleep, then we are not worried about volume.

I definitely won't clutch my pearls of they hear us from time to time or have an idea of what we are doing. We are married and we are healthy. Frequent sex is what happens in good marriages.

If my kids banged on the door of the bathroom and demanded anything they'd lose screens for a few days.

They can "demand" a trip to the doctor if they're sick or bang on the door if the house is on fire. In any other circumstance they need to politely respect boundaries.

Maybe some of the posters who don't have sex in the house have raised their kids to feel entitled to 100% of their time and unable to hear "no."

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess we're a little more open with communication (and sarcasm) in this house. Here's a dialogue between DS(16) and me (his dad) on a Saturday morning a few months ago. I was helping the wife out with the laundry while she ran errands.

Me: Wake up. Are you going to sleep all day?
DS: I didn't sleep well last night.
Me: What was wrong?
DS: Things were pretty noisy around here.
Me: Oh. Well sorry about that. Now get up. I need your sheets.
DS: I can't until you leave. I'm not wearing anything.
Me: Oh reallllly. Nudie nudie, huh? Looks like somebody else had some fun of his own last night.
DS: Well, if ya can't beat'em, join'em.

This is what I love about this kid. He's considerate and well behaved, but he can give it right back to you every time. And he got the point across loud and clear without having to bang on our door.

Dude. Sexual banter with your teen son about him yanking it to you and your wife... gross