Anonymous
Post 01/30/2014 15:16     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
I hope the op has figured out the right course of action. The proof better be concrete before you risk ruining people's marriages.

If the proof is legit then the pregnant wife needs to know her dead beat husband is cheating on her,

Just my opinion
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2014 14:56     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
What's the latest update? Have they been found out yet?
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2014 15:13     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP back with an update! I thought about it more & decided Im going to wait until after the baby is born, maybe 8-12 weeks out? Then I am going to go to her and just have a discussion with her 1 on 1. I will not show her proof or mention it unless it looks like she doesnt believe me, & then I will. I will also see if the arrival of the baby changes the social scene & if they keep spending time together. Something about them all socializing so often makes it a lot worse. & the cheating woman acting like her best friend, its wrong. I spoke to my neighborhood girlfriends and were all on the same page.


Frankly, I think this is a lot better than an anonymous note. An anonymous note is the worst of all possible worlds - the wife gets potentially devastating information that rocks her world, but no way to follow up with questions or assess the reliability of the source. At least this way, she'll have some information about how much weight she should give your info.

Not thrilled about the "speaking to the neighborhood girlfriends" part - this woman has enough on her plate without all y'all gossiping behind her back.


There is no altruistic purpose for what OP wants to do. She is a nasty, ugly, jealous, vindictive, busybody who gets off on other people's misery.



I'm not talking about OP's motives, frankly. I'm more interested in how this will affect the wife. I'm of the opinion that OP should either keep her mouth shut (clearly not happening) or pass along her info identifying herself as the source. An anonymous note, which many PPs recommended, is the worst possible option. The wife has this terrible burden without any way of checking to see if it's a hoax, baseless revenge, kids screwing around, etc. And if her DH tries to deny it, she would have no way of asking follow up questions - she'd just be left in limbo.

So while I'm really hoping I don't know OP in real life, because she does sound drama-prone, I'm thinking at least this isn't the worst choice for the wife at issue.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2014 15:13     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:They are behaving intimately outside? I'd take a pic and mail it to the wife.


Why?


Because she deserves to know, unequivocally, what her DH and neighbor are doing in public view when she's not around. If she chooses to ignore the situation after that, that's up to her.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2014 15:08     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP back with an update! I thought about it more & decided Im going to wait until after the baby is born, maybe 8-12 weeks out? Then I am going to go to her and just have a discussion with her 1 on 1. I will not show her proof or mention it unless it looks like she doesnt believe me, & then I will. I will also see if the arrival of the baby changes the social scene & if they keep spending time together. Something about them all socializing so often makes it a lot worse. & the cheating woman acting like her best friend, its wrong. I spoke to my neighborhood girlfriends and were all on the same page.


Frankly, I think this is a lot better than an anonymous note. An anonymous note is the worst of all possible worlds - the wife gets potentially devastating information that rocks her world, but no way to follow up with questions or assess the reliability of the source. At least this way, she'll have some information about how much weight she should give your info.

Not thrilled about the "speaking to the neighborhood girlfriends" part - this woman has enough on her plate without all y'all gossiping behind her back.


There is no altruistic purpose for what OP wants to do. She is a nasty, ugly, jealous, vindictive, busybody who gets off on other people's misery.

Anonymous
Post 01/17/2014 15:02     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
Anonymous wrote:OP back with an update! I thought about it more & decided Im going to wait until after the baby is born, maybe 8-12 weeks out? Then I am going to go to her and just have a discussion with her 1 on 1. I will not show her proof or mention it unless it looks like she doesnt believe me, & then I will. I will also see if the arrival of the baby changes the social scene & if they keep spending time together. Something about them all socializing so often makes it a lot worse. & the cheating woman acting like her best friend, its wrong. I spoke to my neighborhood girlfriends and were all on the same page.


Frankly, I think this is a lot better than an anonymous note. An anonymous note is the worst of all possible worlds - the wife gets potentially devastating information that rocks her world, but no way to follow up with questions or assess the reliability of the source. At least this way, she'll have some information about how much weight she should give your info.

Not thrilled about the "speaking to the neighborhood girlfriends" part - this woman has enough on her plate without all y'all gossiping behind her back.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2014 14:51     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
To gawk and take intrusive pictures like that (shudder). That's nothing to brag to the neighbors about, OP....wow.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2014 11:57     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
Anonymous wrote:I live in a new construction neighborhood where everyone moved in at the same time a little over a year ago & are all very friendly and socialize constantly. Especially the couples w/no kids or small kids. My husband saw, at least twice, that the husband of one of the couples is sexually involved with the wife of another couple. As crazy as this sounds they have behaved intimately outside, that is how my husband saw. Who knows what's happening behind closed doors.

If I didn't know everyone well I would think maybe it is an open marriage but that is not what is going on. Lots of little things are starting to add up now. It is clear to us that these 2 are cheating on their spouses (and the spouses are really good people, the wife who is being cheated on is about to have her 1st baby any day).

Stay out of it right? I feel sick every time I see any of them. Especially the pregnant lady. It just feels wrong to know.


If you're so animate about getting involved then have your husband do it. He's the one who saw the sexual activity and he's the one who is more likely to be able to withstand the right hook to the jaw when less-than-appreciative neighbors take a swing and say "MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS!!"
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2014 11:52     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
This won't end well for you OP.

It may not end well for the people you're discussing either, but nothing about this bodes well for you (or speaks well for your character.)

Anonymous
Post 01/17/2014 11:52     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
You "spoke with your neighborhood girlfriends"?

You're either a troll or incredibly nasty. You are definitely not acting in a kind way regarding the alleged victim in this little drama.



Anonymous
Post 01/16/2014 23:25     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
I am curious, when you spoke with your neighborhood girlfriends about this, had any of them already figured out that the neighbors were having an affair?
Anonymous
Post 01/16/2014 22:03     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
Waiting until her baby is born is cruel OP. I wanted to kill my husband in those first sleepless weeks and he hadn't done anything wrong other than buy the wrong coffee at the store. She will not be able to process a blow like this with a newborn, if your going to say something (which I don't think you should) you need to do it now so she can deal before having to deal with a newborn.
Anonymous
Post 01/16/2014 20:15     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
Anonymous wrote:OP back with an update! I thought about it more & decided Im going to wait until after the baby is born, maybe 8-12 weeks out? Then I am going to go to her and just have a discussion with her 1 on 1. I will not show her proof or mention it unless it looks like she doesnt believe me, & then I will. I will also see if the arrival of the baby changes the social scene & if they keep spending time together. Something about them all socializing so often makes it a lot worse. & the cheating woman acting like her best friend, its wrong. I spoke to my neighborhood girlfriends and were all on the same page.


You told all of your neighbors? That is evil.
Anonymous
Post 01/16/2014 19:39     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
Anonymous wrote:OP back with an update! I thought about it more & decided Im going to wait until after the baby is born, maybe 8-12 weeks out? Then I am going to go to her and just have a discussion with her 1 on 1. I will not show her proof or mention it unless it looks like she doesnt believe me, & then I will. I will also see if the arrival of the baby changes the social scene & if they keep spending time together. Something about them all socializing so often makes it a lot worse. & the cheating woman acting like her best friend, its wrong. I spoke to my neighborhood girlfriends and were all on the same page.


Oh boy, did you share that picture with these girlfriends, too? You do like this pregnant lady...don't you? 'Cause with friends like you....
Anonymous
Post 01/16/2014 19:36     Subject: Married neighbors having an affair
Anonymous wrote:OP is the nastiest person on DCUM, and that is saying something.


She is nasty for the sake of being nasty! Or maybe her entire personality is rotten.

She at last have the attention of the neighborhood. And she is doing it out of jealously. I bet the other neighbors have bigger and better houses than her.




You haven't been on DCUM long if you think OP is the 'nastiest person on DCUM.' She isn't even doing anything wrong. Asking for advice doesn't make you a nasty person you twit.....or cheater.