Anonymous wrote:And what about the kid who's quiet, who's doing fine academically with minimal supports, but is physically slower than the rest and gets picked on?
What about the parents who spend $35K on their child's education to have him or her counseled out because they just don't fit a mould? I knew a kid who was counseled out because he didn't like sports.
As evidenced by the comments here, everyone will assume a child that's been counseled out has been all of the above--disruptive to a class, a major drain on resources, etc. Clearly there is a stigma associated with being asked to leave.
Most parents of kids who have been counseled out wouldn't have cared at all if their child hadn't been accepted in the first place. But advocating for your child in private school--yeah, what kind of sick, selfish, deluded person would do that?

Anonymous wrote:Title III of the ADA applies to public accommodations, which includes private schools. The only schools that are ADA exempt are, ironically, parochial schools. If you scroll down on the links I posted you'll see there are three laws that protect kids with disabilities (mental or physical): IDEA applies to public schools, Section 504 applies to public and private schools that receive federal aid, and Title III of the ADA, applies to public accommodations, including non-religious private schools.
So, if a kid is otherwise qualified to be at the school (passed admissions requirements, is ok academically) and can be reasonably accommodated, a non-religious private school cannot remove a child for a disability.
Funny, we paid full tuition and got counseled out anyway. A friend in a similar situation just made a $25k donation to the school and suddenly everything's right again. How is that any different than extorting extra money out of families with disabled kids? And no, it is not legal to charge disabled kids extra.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, my daughter was in a progressive school. I thought they'd be more tolerant, not less. Go figure.
As you can see from the comments above, once your child has been counseled out, people make a lot of assumptions: that your child must be seriously disabled, that he or she had serious, unmanageable behavioral issues and disrupted the entire class, that you were an obnoxious, aggressive, helicopter parent, all of which just makes the experience of being counseled out all the more damaging. And if it happens at a progressive school...well, if such a warm, wonderful, welcoming place would do that to your child, then you all must be super f***ed up. If you try to explain how it all happened, it sounds so preposterous, that people think you're a liar in addition to all of the above.
Again, wouldn't it be nice if the schools had to make their "counseling out" rates public?

Anonymous wrote:My SPD daughter has had an audiological evaluation, a full psycho-educational evaluation, and has met with a psychiatrist and a speech language pathologist. She does not meet the diagnostic criteria for autism, a learning difference, ADHD, or a language disorder.
She's meeting now with yet another psychologist.
She does have hypotonia and is sensitive to clothing and loud sounds.
A lot of negative assumptions are being made out me (that I'm in denial and not committed to understanding my daughter's needs) and about my daughter (that she must have a whole host of problems I'm not mentioning) based on the fact that she's being counseled out, which, as I said before, makes the experience of being counseled out that much more damaging.
And again, we are looking for other schools. She may very well have to go to public.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I realize this is an old thread, but there are so many interesting comments about this, I thought I'd add my experience:
Six weeks into starting at a highly, highly regarded private school, my first grader began the process of being counseled out. She has SPD but is in no way disruptive or mean. She has been bullied all year. (Called "Slowy," told by another student that if she didn't do he asked, the teacher would spank her--one day she told me the boys used her face as a target to kick a ball into).
Funny, the kids that bullied my daughter are all being asked back.
I disagree with the notion that you give up 100% of your rights when you write a tuition check. Kids do have rights, even in private school. Title III of the ADA protects disabled kids in all but parochial schools. The disabilities include ADHD, SPD, learning differences, etc. KNOW YOUR RIGHTS! Most parents just move on, but how will that change anything? These people are getting paid enough money, they should be a little more invested in their students. Can my daughter be replaced with an easier kid without a disability? Of course! In a heart beat. But it's wrong. I'd think a school administration, which serves as a role model for kids, should know this!
Of course I don't want my daughter to continue at the school, and I don't want to sue, because I'm not after money, but I am thinking of...reporting them to the Office of Civil Rights at the Department of Justice (they enforce the ADA).

With all due respect to you and your child, I would guess that the Civil Rights Division has more pressing matters on its docket than getting involved in an intramural dispute based on an ADHD diagnosis at a selective private -- excuse me, "highly, highly regarded private" -- school.

PP's DD doesn't have ADHD she has SPD. The former is a real, medical diagnosis. The latter is not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I realize this is an old thread, but there are so many interesting comments about this, I thought I'd add my experience:
Six weeks into starting at a highly, highly regarded private school, my first grader began the process of being counseled out. She has SPD but is in no way disruptive or mean. She has been bullied all year. (Called "Slowy," told by another student that if she didn't do he asked, the teacher would spank her--one day she told me the boys used her face as a target to kick a ball into).
Funny, the kids that bullied my daughter are all being asked back.
I disagree with the notion that you give up 100% of your rights when you write a tuition check. Kids do have rights, even in private school. Title III of the ADA protects disabled kids in all but parochial schools. The disabilities include ADHD, SPD, learning differences, etc. KNOW YOUR RIGHTS! Most parents just move on, but how will that change anything? These people are getting paid enough money, they should be a little more invested in their students. Can my daughter be replaced with an easier kid without a disability? Of course! In a heart beat. But it's wrong. I'd think a school administration, which serves as a role model for kids, should know this!
Of course I don't want my daughter to continue at the school, and I don't want to sue, because I'm not after money, but I am thinking of...reporting them to the Office of Civil Rights at the Department of Justice (they enforce the ADA).

With all due respect to you and your child, I would guess that the Civil Rights Division has more pressing matters on its docket than getting involved in an intramural dispute based on an ADHD diagnosis at a selective private -- excuse me, "highly, highly regarded private" -- school.

PP's DD doesn't have ADHD she has SPD. The former is a real, medical diagnosis. The latter is not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I realize this is an old thread, but there are so many interesting comments about this, I thought I'd add my experience:
Six weeks into starting at a highly, highly regarded private school, my first grader began the process of being counseled out. She has SPD but is in no way disruptive or mean. She has been bullied all year. (Called "Slowy," told by another student that if she didn't do he asked, the teacher would spank her--one day she told me the boys used her face as a target to kick a ball into).
Funny, the kids that bullied my daughter are all being asked back.
I disagree with the notion that you give up 100% of your rights when you write a tuition check. Kids do have rights, even in private school. Title III of the ADA protects disabled kids in all but parochial schools. The disabilities include ADHD, SPD, learning differences, etc. KNOW YOUR RIGHTS! Most parents just move on, but how will that change anything? These people are getting paid enough money, they should be a little more invested in their students. Can my daughter be replaced with an easier kid without a disability? Of course! In a heart beat. But it's wrong. I'd think a school administration, which serves as a role model for kids, should know this!
Of course I don't want my daughter to continue at the school, and I don't want to sue, because I'm not after money, but I am thinking of...reporting them to the Office of Civil Rights at the Department of Justice (they enforce the ADA).

With all due respect to you and your child, I would guess that the Civil Rights Division has more pressing matters on its docket than getting involved in an intramural dispute based on an ADHD diagnosis at a selective private -- excuse me, "highly, highly regarded private" -- school.

Anonymous wrote:I realize this is an old thread, but there are so many interesting comments about this, I thought I'd add my experience:
Six weeks into starting at a highly, highly regarded private school, my first grader began the process of being counseled out. She has SPD but is in no way disruptive or mean. She has been bullied all year. (Called "Slowy," told by another student that if she didn't do he asked, the teacher would spank her--one day she told me the boys used her face as a target to kick a ball into).
Funny, the kids that bullied my daughter are all being asked back.
I disagree with the notion that you give up 100% of your rights when you write a tuition check. Kids do have rights, even in private school. Title III of the ADA protects disabled kids in all but parochial schools. The disabilities include ADHD, SPD, learning differences, etc. KNOW YOUR RIGHTS! Most parents just move on, but how will that change anything? These people are getting paid enough money, they should be a little more invested in their students. Can my daughter be replaced with an easier kid without a disability? Of course! In a heart beat. But it's wrong. I'd think a school administration, which serves as a role model for kids, should know this!
Of course I don't want my daughter to continue at the school, and I don't want to sue, because I'm not after money, but I am thinking of...reporting them to the Office of Civil Rights at the Department of Justice (they enforce the ADA).