Another:

"Underpants that aren't cotton will give you a yeast infection"

WTF?? Well at least was never true for me.

OP again.

Feel like a dam has burst with all these mom-isms.

When I was about 10 my mom told me that my 12-year old cousin was adopted so if I developed feelings for him that it was okay. This was a kid I saw about once a year and the thought hadn't even crossed my mind.

To this day, anytime she sees a photograph of me she comments about how unfortunate it is that I don't photograph well & never have.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sneakers are called "yottins". No idea.

My mother calls them "sneaks". I think I'd take "yottins" over that any day.

Same with my MIL. "Yottins" sounds way better.

Anonymous wrote:My mom used to tell people she was a tea bagger until I told her what that was.

LOL!

What was she trying to say, that she was a Tea party supporter?

I was in my late twenties and was home for Christmas. Everyone was over - aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents. that year, my parents got me a beautiful sapphire and diamond cocktail ring. I was so shocked and couldn't believe it and so happy. That is, until my mother announces loudly and in front of everyone. I'm so glad you love the ring. Daddy and I figured that you weren't ever going to get a ring on that finger (ring-finger) so we just had to buckle up and get you one ourselves. Enjoy it sweetheart. Now you'll have a ring like everyone else.

My mom and my grandma call dresses "shifts", it was so embarassing to come down to meet my date and have them coo over my cute shift. LOL, of course now that my grandma is gone, I would love to hear her say that again.

Kind of hesitant to post this, but since so many others have mentioned the racist issues. My mom's family is from a VERY small town in the midwest. Like probably less than 5 black families and no hispanics, asians, or other minorities. My grandmother sold DH my grandfather's truck after he passed away and told us with a blush and sly smile that my grandfather called the bars across on the front of truck the "n_gg__ knocker." Mortified beyond belief. She also sends my email all kinds of anti-gay stuff and the Obama is a Muslim propaganda... in addition to all kinds of Christian/God emails.

My mom likes to comment on my weight. Her side of my family is all overweight by at LEAST 50 pounds (herself included) and the only time I've weighed over 100lbs is when I was pregnant (I'm under 5ft tall, fwiw).

In college - "looks like the freshmen 15 got you"

2 months postpartum on anniversary date with DH when I couldn't get the dress I wanted to wear zipped up thanks to my massive breastfeeding boobs - "maybe someday you'll be able to wear your nice dresses again"

3 months postpartum (yesterday) - had a bowl of oatmeal for breakfast and then a few hours later was making eggs and banana pancakes for myself and my 3yo for lunch, "oh, the oatmeal wasn't enough for you?"

This from the woman who starves herself all day and then will use it to justify going through a drive through and getting a large meal plus a milkshake.

Yep, I definitely started having body image issues at a young age.

I am about 38 weeks pregnant and my dh and I have been really laid back about getting prepared for the birth. Everyone around us is getting all anxious.

So, I was talking to my mother on phone and she tried to stage an intervention.

Mom: Did you guys get the crib yet?

Me: Not yet, we'll get it this weekend. Mom, I assure you that everything will be fine.

Mom: Well, I guess I just want you to be more chalant about this.

Me: You want me to what?

Mom: You know, you are acting all nonchalant and I really wish you would be more chalant.

Me: (Laughing so hard I could barely breathe)

Mom: Chalant is not a word is it?

Me: (Still laughing)

Mom: Well you know what I mean. (hangs up on me in a huff)

The other day my mother told me that I was being "

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"What's google?"

My mom asked me how to google something :-/

I told my grandma she should look up something online and she said, "OK, I'll giggle it." She called it giggle for a little until my husband finally corrected her.

That is adorable.

Anonymous wrote:Advice as I headed off for college -- "when in doubt, stay off your knees."

True, true.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sneakers are called "yottins". No idea.

My mother calls them "sneaks". I think I'd take "yottins" over that any day.

oh sh*t, I call them sneaks! Is my kid going to write about me on this thread one day? I also call them tennies some times! Husband calls them trainers though, and he's NOT british, so I'm not sure if I'm worse than him.

Yes. Especially if you were an English major like my mom.

When my son was a few months old my mother was visiting and we were talking about what his first solid food should be. Out of the blue she says, "let's give him some sugar and see what he does!". My heart sank when I realized she wouldn't be babysitting any time soon.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"What's google?"

My mom asked me how to google something :-/

I told my grandma she should look up something online and she said, "OK, I'll giggle it." She called it giggle for a little until my husband finally corrected her.

He shouldn't have corrected her! That's so cute.

Once, when I was talking with my mother on the phone, she randomly started going on and on and on about how miniature horses make great seeing eye guide animals.

A few days later, I talked with my sister and found out that mom had told her about the miniature horses, too, and also at great length.

That was a couple of years ago, and even now just mentioning miniature horses will get her going on the topic. I don't know why she's so enthusiastic about miniature seeing eye horses.