Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 19:28     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
It’s outrageously expensive. It’s ok for people making $400k in a high cost of living area to not be able to afford that.

Honors colleges at state flagships are a mor affordable alternative.

We’re “lucky” as our kids (all 3) wanted the big school, sports scene. There is something to be said for that. 2 went to private universities for grad school though (on their dime, mostly).
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 17:54     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
Anonymous wrote:Op, all you had to do was invest $1000 a month into VOO for 15 years. You had the income to do so. Forget about TSP, savings, and 529 if you have it.They don't teach you anything and returns are much lower than what you could have gotten on your own.
I invested $500 a month for ca 25 years while making $30k a year. I don't work for money anymore.
College for DC1 will cost us $50k total: no loans, no aid.
DC is working at 18, while attending college. I will pay for their school, because I want them to invest all their money.
Op, you were not as good with money as you think you were. Go back in time and see where you could have done better. Do better you can going forward. Let your kids know that investing does exist. They should have learned and started long ago, because incomes go up only so much.


How did you invest $500/mo while making $30,000/year for 25 years? That is 20% of your salary before takehome. Even 25 years ago crappy 2 bedroom-ish apts were over $1000 plus utilities in the area I lived in (hcol area but talking about lower end areas within that)...plus food, transportation, and child care (not 25 years ago, but 16 years ago I paid $400 per week for child care for 1 infant).

I'm not trying to be a jerk, I'm trying to understand how you possibly did that. Or am I misunderstanding what you said?
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 17:11     Subject: Re:Coming to Terms with Full Pay
Anonymous wrote:Pretty much. Thank you for saving! Without your discipline and frugality many free ride kids wouldn’t get the chance to attend the school.


Were you born nasty, or is this a learned character defect?
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 17:08     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
Anonymous wrote:OP, you may have addressed this but I don’t have time to read all the comments. Are your kids still young enough for you to move/rent in Virginia and meet the residency requirement? That would open up so many more options for you.

Virginians always say this but it really doesn’t help.

OP’s primary concern is with the cost of private schools, which are no less expensive from Virginia.

As for state schools, moving to Virginia makes almost all of them more expensive, not less, because you lose TAG.

As for Virginia schools, most are no more expensive from DC than from Virginia, after merit and TAG.

Moving to Virginia for colleges only really makes sense if you are planning to send your child to UVA or W&M. Which of course is why high school in NoVa can get so cutthroat.

(There are plenty of other excellent reasons to live in the beautiful state of Virginia, but if those reasons were compelling to OP, they’d already live there.)
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 16:33     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
OP, you may have addressed this but I don’t have time to read all the comments. Are your kids still young enough for you to move/rent in Virginia and meet the residency requirement? That would open up so many more options for you.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 16:18     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
Anonymous wrote:OP could consider having her kids to apply to school in Canada and Europe. Much much cheaper, even as an international student, and still a good quality education at many universities.


Canadian schools are cheaper...but I wouldn't say much, much cheaper...at least the schools my kid looked at. UToronto for engineering 2 years ago came to around US$64k...I assume it is probably around US$70k now. This was just tuition and room & board...this doesn't include other items like travel, books, etc. that are estimated in the total COA.

They do charge a la carte and engineering majors cost more than liberal arts.

Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 15:44     Subject: Re:Coming to Terms with Full Pay
OP's family is one of those that needs to think long and hard about which private schools are worth them going Full Pay. Our friends with fed job opted to be almost full pay for HSYP. But I don't think they would have done that for a school like American or GWU.

I don't think it's worth being Full Pay because of a major that your DC likes since so many kids switch majors by the time they finish.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 15:15     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone so fussy about the Catholic schools? Go look at the IG accounts. The athletes are marked; the high schools are proud of their athletic programs and want people to know which kids are recruited athletes. There are many, many kids going to state schools from DC Catholic high schools, and relatively few of them are athletes.


And many unhooked going to Ivies, T-10/20s. As someone pointed out someone is comparing 60 person class vs a 240 class. The top 1/4 aren’t any different than those from the “big” 3-5.


Of course they’re different. The kids at the less expensive schools are paying less in tuition.


Hey genius, the poster was talking about college outcomes.


This entire thread is about how money dictates college outcomes.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 15:11     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
OP could consider having her kids to apply to school in Canada and Europe. Much much cheaper, even as an international student, and still a good quality education at many universities.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 15:08     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
Op, all you had to do was invest $1000 a month into VOO for 15 years. You had the income to do so. Forget about TSP, savings, and 529 if you have it.They don't teach you anything and returns are much lower than what you could have gotten on your own.
I invested $500 a month for ca 25 years while making $30k a year. I don't work for money anymore.
College for DC1 will cost us $50k total: no loans, no aid.
DC is working at 18, while attending college. I will pay for their school, because I want them to invest all their money.
Op, you were not as good with money as you think you were. Go back in time and see where you could have done better. Do better you can going forward. Let your kids know that investing does exist. They should have learned and started long ago, because incomes go up only so much.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 14:41     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
Yes OP. We're in a similar boat. But wait and see what your kid ends up liking for colleges - you might be surprised. At the start of our DD's search we were all focused on prestige, but as time went on she became more focused on fit and ended up EDing to a target and forgoing T20 options even without factoring in financials.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 14:23     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone so fussy about the Catholic schools? Go look at the IG accounts. The athletes are marked; the high schools are proud of their athletic programs and want people to know which kids are recruited athletes. There are many, many kids going to state schools from DC Catholic high schools, and relatively few of them are athletes.


And many unhooked going to Ivies, T-10/20s. As someone pointed out someone is comparing 60 person class vs a 240 class. The top 1/4 aren’t any different than those from the “big” 3-5.


Of course they’re different. The kids at the less expensive schools are paying less in tuition.


Hey genius, the poster was talking about college outcomes.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 13:58     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone so fussy about the Catholic schools? Go look at the IG accounts. The athletes are marked; the high schools are proud of their athletic programs and want people to know which kids are recruited athletes. There are many, many kids going to state schools from DC Catholic high schools, and relatively few of them are athletes.


And many unhooked going to Ivies, T-10/20s. As someone pointed out someone is comparing 60 person class vs a 240 class. The top 1/4 aren’t any different than those from the “big” 3-5.


Of course they’re different. The kids at the less expensive schools are paying less in tuition.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 13:25     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone so fussy about the Catholic schools? Go look at the IG accounts. The athletes are marked; the high schools are proud of their athletic programs and want people to know which kids are recruited athletes. There are many, many kids going to state schools from DC Catholic high schools, and relatively few of them are athletes.


And many unhooked going to Ivies, T-10/20s. As someone pointed out someone is comparing 60 person class vs a 240 class. The top 1/4 aren’t any different than those from the “big” 3-5.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2025 12:51     Subject: Coming to Terms with Full Pay
Anonymous wrote:I am surprised that people are just focusing on the income aspect of the way UMC families are impacted. One of the bigger impacts is home equity, some schools, Emory for example, count 100% of your home equity in determining aid. Keep in mind not all schools do that so you should use the calculators for each school to see rather than assume all pricey privates are going to offer (or not) your student a similar amount of aid.

I think people avoid talking about net price calculators because they are so uncertain. The schools are not bound to the amounts shown in the calculators, and schools can adjust their formulas from year to year. But you are correct, for some families the amount you are expected to pay will vary dramatically from one school to another.