Anonymous
12/04/2024 23:14
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Nope. If she is drunk or roofied or scared, it's not OK to have sex with her. Yes it would be better if she hadn't got in that situation but the partner who proceeds without consent is responsible for that choice he is making. Stop acting like men can't help themselves. And stop acting like the goal should be anything except enthusiastic participation.
No one is saying it’s okay to rape someone so come off it.
You’re talking about teaching your daughter that it’s not her fault after she’s been victimized. Meanwhile, I’ll continue teaching my daughter how to drastically reduce her chances of being victimized in the first place.
It’s magical thinking to imagine that your daughter will someday live in world where no man will sexually assault her if she gets blackout drunk at a random party, because finally someone taught all those darn rapists that they’re not allowed to do that!
Seriously, do you hear yourself?
You responded to a thread about someone's actual assault, and about how a man could possibly know a woman didn't consent. Your response was "stop teaching girls that they can't use their words." Do you hear yourself?
The post directly above yours was about someone too drunk to consent. Is that ideal? No. Should you teach your DD not to get drunk like that, especially with people she doesn't know or trust? Of course, that's a great thing to teach. AND ALSO teach boys, and expect boys, not to have sex with someone who is too drunk to consent, regardless of whether she says no. Boys absolutely have responsibility for what they do with their own bodies and whether they choose to have sex with someone who didn't clearly consent.
Stop.Being.Stupid.
You can’t control what other people do or don’t teach their sons. Just like you can’t control whether or not your son gives a sh!t. Worry about teaching your daughter to protect herself and not to rely on the kindness of strangers. The only person she can count on to watch out for her safety is herself.
Stop.Infantilizing.Girls.
Anonymous
12/04/2024 22:38
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Nope. If she is drunk or roofied or scared, it's not OK to have sex with her. Yes it would be better if she hadn't got in that situation but the partner who proceeds without consent is responsible for that choice he is making. Stop acting like men can't help themselves. And stop acting like the goal should be anything except enthusiastic participation.
No one is saying it’s okay to rape someone so come off it.
You’re talking about teaching your daughter that it’s not her fault after she’s been victimized. Meanwhile, I’ll continue teaching my daughter how to drastically reduce her chances of being victimized in the first place.
It’s magical thinking to imagine that your daughter will someday live in world where no man will sexually assault her if she gets blackout drunk at a random party, because finally someone taught all those darn rapists that they’re not allowed to do that!
Seriously, do you hear yourself?
You responded to a thread about someone's actual assault, and about how a man could possibly know a woman didn't consent. Your response was "stop teaching girls that they can't use their words." Do you hear yourself?
The post directly above yours was about someone too drunk to consent. Is that ideal? No. Should you teach your DD not to get drunk like that, especially with people she doesn't know or trust? Of course, that's a great thing to teach. AND ALSO teach boys, and expect boys, not to have sex with someone who is too drunk to consent, regardless of whether she says no. Boys absolutely have responsibility for what they do with their own bodies and whether they choose to have sex with someone who didn't clearly consent.
Anonymous
12/04/2024 22:06
Subject: Re:How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:I'm a 52 year old mom of two daughters 18 and 20.
None of us have ever had to deal with sexual harassment. Calm down.
That doesn't mean it doesn't happen to others. I was sexually harrassed by two different guys on the job.
Anonymous
12/04/2024 21:48
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:[twitter]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Gross!!! No I'm sorry, I'm just not going to accept the concept that women have to constantly shoot down advances and if they don't do so aggressively enough for the dumb h*rny male to understand she's giving him a blank check to rape her. Proposition declined. Thank you for illustrating the predatory male entitlement to sex though.
WTF are you on about? Your response is so disconnected from the post you replied to (and reality) that I suggest you might need to call a hotline of some variety.
You are saying men get to badger women for sex constantly and it is the woman's responsibility to say no. It is disgusting. You might be on a list of some kind.
That is not at all what was said. You are completely unhinged.
"It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters."
You are explicitly saying men are entitled to peddle their d--- and its on the woman to say no. Stop gaslighting.
I don’t even know what “peddle their d—-“ is supposed to mean. Use your big girl words.
"Hey baby how you doin?"
"I've never seen a girl as beautiful as you, can I have your number?"
"Do you have a boyfriend"
This is all d--- peddling. An invitation to sex. Women should not have to constantly push away advances for sex for the sin of being a reproductive aged woman in a public space
This isnt harassment. Its conversation. You say "no thanks" and move on.
"Hey I have 2014 Honda civic for sale"
"Hey I emailed my ad about that Civic, check it out"
"Hey isn't your son turning 16, does he need a beater car?"
"Hey, my car only has 80,000 miles and its listed under Kelly blue book"
"Hey that civic I'm trying to sell has leather seats"
"Hey did I mention my civic has a CD player?"
"I vacuumed my civic for you"
"I accept payment plans for the civic"
"I left the change in the coffee holder in that civic for you"
And any one of these statements is totally fine! Are you equally as helpless when your mechanic or your dentist tries to upsell you? Is it harassment when the checkout girl at the Gap asks if you want the 2-for-1 deal and proceeds to tell you what a great bargain it is after you say no?
It's not any one, it's constantly intrusions like that from any number of men every day. If people badgered cars like that it would become illegal. Men have an entitlement to peddle their d--- plus ugly duckly women = weird double standard
Anyway, prove me wrong, give me your email address, I'll sign you up for spam
LOL. We’re all already constantly badgered and bombarded with advertisements! Look at this very website!! Welcome to capitalism, everybody’s selling something.
Your email address, madam.
Anonymous
12/04/2024 21:46
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:[twitter]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Gross!!! No I'm sorry, I'm just not going to accept the concept that women have to constantly shoot down advances and if they don't do so aggressively enough for the dumb h*rny male to understand she's giving him a blank check to rape her. Proposition declined. Thank you for illustrating the predatory male entitlement to sex though.
WTF are you on about? Your response is so disconnected from the post you replied to (and reality) that I suggest you might need to call a hotline of some variety.
You are saying men get to badger women for sex constantly and it is the woman's responsibility to say no. It is disgusting. You might be on a list of some kind.
That is not at all what was said. You are completely unhinged.
"It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters."
You are explicitly saying men are entitled to peddle their d--- and its on the woman to say no. Stop gaslighting.
I don’t even know what “peddle their d—-“ is supposed to mean. Use your big girl words.
"Hey baby how you doin?"
"I've never seen a girl as beautiful as you, can I have your number?"
"Do you have a boyfriend"
This is all d--- peddling. An invitation to sex. Women should not have to constantly push away advances for sex for the sin of being a reproductive aged woman in a public space
This isnt harassment. Its conversation. You say "no thanks" and move on.
"Hey I have 2014 Honda civic for sale"
"Hey I emailed my ad about that Civic, check it out"
"Hey isn't your son turning 16, does he need a beater car?"
"Hey, my car only has 80,000 miles and its listed under Kelly blue book"
"Hey that civic I'm trying to sell has leather seats"
"Hey did I mention my civic has a CD player?"
"I vacuumed my civic for you"
"I accept payment plans for the civic"
"I left the change in the coffee holder in that civic for you"
And any one of these statements is totally fine! Are you equally as helpless when your mechanic or your dentist tries to upsell you? Is it harassment when the checkout girl at the Gap asks if you want the 2-for-1 deal and proceeds to tell you what a great bargain it is after you say no?
It's not any one, it's constantly intrusions like that from any number of men every day. If people badgered cars like that it would become illegal. Men have an entitlement to peddle their d--- plus ugly duckly women = weird double standard
Anyway, prove me wrong, give me your email address, I'll sign you up for spam
LOL. We’re all already constantly badgered and bombarded with advertisements! Look at this very website!! Welcome to capitalism, everybody’s selling something.
Anonymous
12/04/2024 21:39
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:[twitter]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Gross!!! No I'm sorry, I'm just not going to accept the concept that women have to constantly shoot down advances and if they don't do so aggressively enough for the dumb h*rny male to understand she's giving him a blank check to rape her. Proposition declined. Thank you for illustrating the predatory male entitlement to sex though.
WTF are you on about? Your response is so disconnected from the post you replied to (and reality) that I suggest you might need to call a hotline of some variety.
You are saying men get to badger women for sex constantly and it is the woman's responsibility to say no. It is disgusting. You might be on a list of some kind.
That is not at all what was said. You are completely unhinged.
"It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters."
You are explicitly saying men are entitled to peddle their d--- and its on the woman to say no. Stop gaslighting.
I don’t even know what “peddle their d—-“ is supposed to mean. Use your big girl words.
"Hey baby how you doin?"
"I've never seen a girl as beautiful as you, can I have your number?"
"Do you have a boyfriend"
This is all d--- peddling. An invitation to sex. Women should not have to constantly push away advances for sex for the sin of being a reproductive aged woman in a public space
This isnt harassment. Its conversation. You say "no thanks" and move on.
"Hey I have 2014 Honda civic for sale"
"Hey I emailed my ad about that Civic, check it out"
"Hey isn't your son turning 16, does he need a beater car?"
"Hey, my car only has 80,000 miles and its listed under Kelly blue book"
"Hey that civic I'm trying to sell has leather seats"
"Hey did I mention my civic has a CD player?"
"I vacuumed my civic for you"
"I accept payment plans for the civic"
"I left the change in the coffee holder in that civic for you"
And any one of these statements is totally fine! Are you equally as helpless when your mechanic or your dentist tries to upsell you? Is it harassment when the checkout girl at the Gap asks if you want the 2-for-1 deal and proceeds to tell you what a great bargain it is after you say no?
It's not any one, it's constantly intrusions like that from any number of men every day. If people badgered cars like that it would become illegal. Men have an entitlement to peddle their d--- plus ugly duckly women = weird double standard
Anyway, prove me wrong, give me your email address, I'll sign you up for spam
Anonymous
12/04/2024 21:21
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:[twitter]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Gross!!! No I'm sorry, I'm just not going to accept the concept that women have to constantly shoot down advances and if they don't do so aggressively enough for the dumb h*rny male to understand she's giving him a blank check to rape her. Proposition declined. Thank you for illustrating the predatory male entitlement to sex though.
WTF are you on about? Your response is so disconnected from the post you replied to (and reality) that I suggest you might need to call a hotline of some variety.
You are saying men get to badger women for sex constantly and it is the woman's responsibility to say no. It is disgusting. You might be on a list of some kind.
That is not at all what was said. You are completely unhinged.
"It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters."
You are explicitly saying men are entitled to peddle their d--- and its on the woman to say no. Stop gaslighting.
I don’t even know what “peddle their d—-“ is supposed to mean. Use your big girl words.
"Hey baby how you doin?"
"I've never seen a girl as beautiful as you, can I have your number?"
"Do you have a boyfriend"
This is all d--- peddling. An invitation to sex. Women should not have to constantly push away advances for sex for the sin of being a reproductive aged woman in a public space
This isnt harassment. Its conversation. You say "no thanks" and move on.
"Hey I have 2014 Honda civic for sale"
"Hey I emailed my ad about that Civic, check it out"
"Hey isn't your son turning 16, does he need a beater car?"
"Hey, my car only has 80,000 miles and its listed under Kelly blue book"
"Hey that civic I'm trying to sell has leather seats"
"Hey did I mention my civic has a CD player?"
"I vacuumed my civic for you"
"I accept payment plans for the civic"
"I left the change in the coffee holder in that civic for you"
And any one of these statements is totally fine! Are you equally as helpless when your mechanic or your dentist tries to upsell you? Is it harassment when the checkout girl at the Gap asks if you want the 2-for-1 deal and proceeds to tell you what a great bargain it is after you say no?
Those are all part of consensual transactions which involve products and follow a script. It’s not remotely the same as street harassment, which is unpredictable and can escalate quickly into violence.
A ppraising strangers’ bodies, demanding their attention, and calling them names when they don’t react the way you want isn’t conversation. At best it’s rude, intrusive, and disrespectful. At worst it’s harassment.
Predatory men, of course, instinctively understand these rules when interacting with other men in public spaces. When it’s a woman, suddenly they pretend to have complete ignorance of social conventions. “What is consent? I better not talk to her at all. She’ll accuse me of something!”
To be clear, this isn’t the same as being shy, socially awkward, or neurodivergent. People with those traits genuinely want to follow the rules. If they accidentally make someone uncomfortable, they feel bad. For harassers, making women uncomfortable is the entire point.
Anonymous
12/04/2024 21:07
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:[twitter]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Gross!!! No I'm sorry, I'm just not going to accept the concept that women have to constantly shoot down advances and if they don't do so aggressively enough for the dumb h*rny male to understand she's giving him a blank check to rape her. Proposition declined. Thank you for illustrating the predatory male entitlement to sex though.
WTF are you on about? Your response is so disconnected from the post you replied to (and reality) that I suggest you might need to call a hotline of some variety.
You are saying men get to badger women for sex constantly and it is the woman's responsibility to say no. It is disgusting. You might be on a list of some kind.
That is not at all what was said. You are completely unhinged.
"It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters."
You are explicitly saying men are entitled to peddle their d--- and its on the woman to say no. Stop gaslighting.
I don’t even know what “peddle their d—-“ is supposed to mean. Use your big girl words.
"Hey baby how you doin?"
"I've never seen a girl as beautiful as you, can I have your number?"
"Do you have a boyfriend"
This is all d--- peddling. An invitation to sex. Women should not have to constantly push away advances for sex for the sin of being a reproductive aged woman in a public space
This isnt harassment. Its conversation. You say "no thanks" and move on.
"Hey I have 2014 Honda civic for sale"
"Hey I emailed my ad about that Civic, check it out"
"Hey isn't your son turning 16, does he need a beater car?"
"Hey, my car only has 80,000 miles and its listed under Kelly blue book"
"Hey that civic I'm trying to sell has leather seats"
"Hey did I mention my civic has a CD player?"
"I vacuumed my civic for you"
"I accept payment plans for the civic"
"I left the change in the coffee holder in that civic for you"
And any one of these statements is totally fine! Are you equally as helpless when your mechanic or your dentist tries to upsell you? Is it harassment when the checkout girl at the Gap asks if you want the 2-for-1 deal and proceeds to tell you what a great bargain it is after you say no?
Anonymous
12/04/2024 21:03
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Nope. If she is drunk or roofied or scared, it's not OK to have sex with her. Yes it would be better if she hadn't got in that situation but the partner who proceeds without consent is responsible for that choice he is making. Stop acting like men can't help themselves. And stop acting like the goal should be anything except enthusiastic participation.
No one is saying it’s okay to rape someone so come off it.
You’re talking about teaching your daughter that it’s not her fault after she’s been victimized. Meanwhile, I’ll continue teaching my daughter how to drastically reduce her chances of being victimized in the first place.
It’s magical thinking to imagine that your daughter will someday live in world where no man will sexually assault her if she gets blackout drunk at a random party, because finally someone taught all those darn rapists that they’re not allowed to do that!
Seriously, do you hear yourself?
Anonymous
12/04/2024 20:56
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:News flash —
What happens when mom says no to her son, but after “debate”, badgering, or temper tantrums, she gives in to her son’s demands?
Mom is showing her boy that women don’t really mean no, when they say no.
Think about it next time your son seems to not understand the first time you say no.
Anonymous
12/04/2024 20:53
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:[twitter]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Gross!!! No I'm sorry, I'm just not going to accept the concept that women have to constantly shoot down advances and if they don't do so aggressively enough for the dumb h*rny male to understand she's giving him a blank check to rape her. Proposition declined. Thank you for illustrating the predatory male entitlement to sex though.
WTF are you on about? Your response is so disconnected from the post you replied to (and reality) that I suggest you might need to call a hotline of some variety.
You are saying men get to badger women for sex constantly and it is the woman's responsibility to say no. It is disgusting. You might be on a list of some kind.
That is not at all what was said. You are completely unhinged.
"It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters."
You are explicitly saying men are entitled to peddle their d--- and its on the woman to say no. Stop gaslighting.
I don’t even know what “peddle their d—-“ is supposed to mean. Use your big girl words.
"Hey baby how you doin?"
"I've never seen a girl as beautiful as you, can I have your number?"
"Do you have a boyfriend"
This is all d--- peddling. An invitation to sex. Women should not have to constantly push away advances for sex for the sin of being a reproductive aged woman in a public space
I see. Yes, all of those statements are allowed. They might be annoying and unwelcome, but there is nothing remotely harmful to the person on the receiving end.
I mean, think of the many people who are forced to interact with *you* every day. I can’t imagine many people don’t find your unhinged pseudo-feminist ranting annoying and unwelcome, but you’re not actually harming anyone and you certainly aren’t assaulting them!
There's a lot of confusion through this whole thread about what harassment is. Unwelcome advances are harassment, regardless of whether anyone was harmed or traumatized or sad. It doesn't have to ruin your week in order to be harassment.
And no, calling out to someone on the street to ask if she has a boyfriend is not "starting a conversation." It's harassment. If you actually wanted to have a conversation, that's not how you'd do it and everyone knows that.
Somebody actually said you can grope a boob and if a woman says no and pulls away the boob grope wasn't assault. OP should have her DD read this thread!
Well, context matters. If some random guy walks by and grabs your boob, sure that’s assault. If you’re making out with your boyfriend and he moves his hand to your boob, and doesn’t try it again after you push it away, that’s not assault. That’s just normal escalation of sexual behavior between partners.
Are you really this dense?
Anonymous
12/04/2024 20:36
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:[twitter]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Gross!!! No I'm sorry, I'm just not going to accept the concept that women have to constantly shoot down advances and if they don't do so aggressively enough for the dumb h*rny male to understand she's giving him a blank check to rape her. Proposition declined. Thank you for illustrating the predatory male entitlement to sex though.
WTF are you on about? Your response is so disconnected from the post you replied to (and reality) that I suggest you might need to call a hotline of some variety.
You are saying men get to badger women for sex constantly and it is the woman's responsibility to say no. It is disgusting. You might be on a list of some kind.
That is not at all what was said. You are completely unhinged.
"It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters."
You are explicitly saying men are entitled to peddle their d--- and its on the woman to say no. Stop gaslighting.
I don’t even know what “peddle their d—-“ is supposed to mean. Use your big girl words.
"Hey baby how you doin?"
"I've never seen a girl as beautiful as you, can I have your number?"
"Do you have a boyfriend"
This is all d--- peddling. An invitation to sex. Women should not have to constantly push away advances for sex for the sin of being a reproductive aged woman in a public space
This isnt harassment. Its conversation. You say "no thanks" and move on.
It's not conversation - how would that conversation even go?
"Hey stranger walking by and minding her own business, do you have a boyfriend?"
"No, I don't. Do you?"
"No I don't. Do you want to get coffee?"
"Sure! I'd love to continue this conversation over coffee."
That would never happen and nobody expects it's going to happen. The point of yelling "Hey baby" is not to exchange ideas or get to know you, it's to force you to notice them. To intrude on your space. That's what it's about.
Anonymous
12/04/2024 20:35
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:[twitter]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Gross!!! No I'm sorry, I'm just not going to accept the concept that women have to constantly shoot down advances and if they don't do so aggressively enough for the dumb h*rny male to understand she's giving him a blank check to rape her. Proposition declined. Thank you for illustrating the predatory male entitlement to sex though.
WTF are you on about? Your response is so disconnected from the post you replied to (and reality) that I suggest you might need to call a hotline of some variety.
You are saying men get to badger women for sex constantly and it is the woman's responsibility to say no. It is disgusting. You might be on a list of some kind.
That is not at all what was said. You are completely unhinged.
"It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters."
You are explicitly saying men are entitled to peddle their d--- and its on the woman to say no. Stop gaslighting.
I don’t even know what “peddle their d—-“ is supposed to mean. Use your big girl words.
"Hey baby how you doin?"
"I've never seen a girl as beautiful as you, can I have your number?"
"Do you have a boyfriend"
This is all d--- peddling. An invitation to sex. Women should not have to constantly push away advances for sex for the sin of being a reproductive aged woman in a public space
This isnt harassment. Its conversation. You say "no thanks" and move on.
"Hey I have 2014 Honda civic for sale"
"Hey I emailed my ad about that Civic, check it out"
"Hey isn't your son turning 16, does he need a beater car?"
"Hey, my car only has 80,000 miles and its listed under Kelly blue book"
"Hey that civic I'm trying to sell has leather seats"
"Hey did I mention my civic has a CD player?"
"I vacuumed my civic for you"
"I accept payment plans for the civic"
"I left the change in the coffee holder in that civic for you"
Anonymous
12/04/2024 20:31
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:[twitter]Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:PP above and I forgot to add that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in my late teens and 20s and didn’t even fully understand it was sexual assault until the last time (when I pressed charges and was ready to testify until last-minute plea deal). That’s why I have started so early with DD.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m not really understanding a sexual assault that you “didn’t really understand was sexual assault” until it happened to you several times.
Obviously that sounds horrific. Very confusing though for the guy as well if he also didn’t realize that it was against your will? Just trying to figure out how that is communicated after the fact so that he is also aware that you now realize it was sexual assault.
I am not PP but a lot of people think it isn't assault if it isn't violent rape. Too drunk to consent, froze up, groped but no penetration - lots of people wrongly think these are not assault.
How is the guy going to know that you don’t want it if you don’t say no.
Unless she clearly says yes, it should not proceed. PERIOD. My friends with boys are teaching their boys this.
If they are drinking to the point of drunk and unable to consent it shoudl not go forward.
Boys aren't animals. It's time we stop treating them like they are not capable of knowing when there is consent.
It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters.
Gross!!! No I'm sorry, I'm just not going to accept the concept that women have to constantly shoot down advances and if they don't do so aggressively enough for the dumb h*rny male to understand she's giving him a blank check to rape her. Proposition declined. Thank you for illustrating the predatory male entitlement to sex though.
WTF are you on about? Your response is so disconnected from the post you replied to (and reality) that I suggest you might need to call a hotline of some variety.
You are saying men get to badger women for sex constantly and it is the woman's responsibility to say no. It is disgusting. You might be on a list of some kind.
That is not at all what was said. You are completely unhinged.
"It’s well past time to stop teaching girls that they can’t use their words. Stop infantilizing women and girls. Don’t teach your daughters that her safety is anyone’s responsibility but her own, for starters."
You are explicitly saying men are entitled to peddle their d--- and its on the woman to say no. Stop gaslighting.
I don’t even know what “peddle their d—-“ is supposed to mean. Use your big girl words.
"Hey baby how you doin?"
"I've never seen a girl as beautiful as you, can I have your number?"
"Do you have a boyfriend"
This is all d--- peddling. An invitation to sex. Women should not have to constantly push away advances for sex for the sin of being a reproductive aged woman in a public space
This isnt harassment. Its conversation. You say "no thanks" and move on.
Anonymous
12/04/2024 20:24
Subject: How are you preparing your DD to protect herself?