Anonymous wrote:Can we just be honest and admit that we do it because we want them to treat our kids well?

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Anonymous wrote:Eh, you sound cheap. No need to justify it.

+1,000

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Anonymous wrote:When I was a teacher, I really appreciated these because my salary was very low and many of our families were quite wealthy and could afford to send a gift at the holidays. It is a token of appreciation for hard work. For example, taking a week long trip with my students for no extra compensation that involved camping, driving hours to another state, and cleaning up vomit when kids got sick from stomach flu.

Bull.

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Anonymous wrote:So don't! I promise you, absolutely no one is keeping score. I taught for many many years, and the majority of families didn't give or the room parent would organize one class wide gift and I had no idea who did/didn't contribute. Please don't give out of a sense of obligation.

The room parents keep track of who does and doesn’t contribute to the class gift and talk about it. You get a reputation if you don’t contribute to the class gift.

Why would anyone care about that? I do my own thing for the teachers. And given how little they get, clearly not everyone is donating, its a waste of hot air what they spend their time gossiping about.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you for all the different views. I hope all of you who defend buying the gift cards also make sure your kids are thankful for their teachers and make them cards, arts and craft etc. By making your kids work and think of why they are thankful, you make sure they respect the teachers the remaining 364 days a year. I saw some very rich and very disrespectful kids in my kids’ classes over the years. Kids literally ordering the teachers around. I am sure those parents give the teachers nice gift cards and I highly doubt those kids spend time doing something nice for those teachers they treat so disrespectfully.

As I mentioned, my kids are in private schools and I highly doubt the teachers pay for any supply. My kids have more than they could ever use and in my eldest we actually buy her supplies at the beginning of the year (on top of the $53k for tuition). But if teachers do pay for anything out of pockets, then I absolutely agree that parents should reimburse them one way or another.

I think my plan moving forward will be to perhaps buy a gift with a gift receipt and keep making my kids write nice cards and choose small gifts for their teachers when we travel.

Anonymous wrote:
People do it to get preferential treatment, to try to buy good grades , and to keep the teacher/ adm from entering disciplinary records. I’ve seen this happening in both public and private schools.
My kids (and I) find it disturbing.

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Anonymous wrote:OP here. I think it makes some parents feel in a superior position (subconsciously of course).

But I agree, it’s a cultural difference in the end. For us teachers are professionals and not our paid employees. I would be offended in the teacher’s place and I am sure the teachers from my country would too. Americans teachers perhaps do not feel offended because it’s a given nowadays and they are practicals and parents like the position of feeling like they are able to help the poor teachers.

I think a thank you card made by the student is much more appropriate or a small gift we bring back from our travelings to show we thought of them and what they might enjoy.

Honestly, the teacher may not want a small gift from your travels. What are they going to do with it?

Op a gift cards is better. Imagine the collection of trinkets and coffee cups some teachers have.

But the difference is that I want to give them something that I/my kids chose or made for them. I don’t think they need my money. Buying an Amazon gift card takes me 1 minute and ny kids zero time. Making a card, going to a store and buying a special present takes my kids time and effort. Ultimately, they are the ones that need to appreciate their teachers and show their appreciation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I think it makes some parents feel in a superior position (subconsciously of course).

But I agree, it’s a cultural difference in the end. For us teachers are professionals and not our paid employees. I would be offended in the teacher’s place and I am sure the teachers from my country would too. Americans teachers perhaps do not feel offended because it’s a given nowadays and they are practicals and parents like the position of feeling like they are able to help the poor teachers.

I think a thank you card made by the student is much more appropriate or a small gift we bring back from our travelings to show we thought of them and what they might enjoy.

Honestly, the teacher may not want a small gift from your travels. What are they going to do with it?

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Anonymous wrote:Just chalk it up to a cultural difference. It's pretty clear you aren't trying to understand so do what you want and let it go. If you give a gift card the teacher will not be offended or insulted. If you don't give a gift card, the teacher is not going to look at you any differently. It's fine.

I think I actually do understand and I think it comes from a bad place. You show that you are thankful by saying “thank you”, being respectful, supporting the teachers, writing a card and spending time choosing a gift or making it yourself. Not buying a gift card. We do it because everyone else does it and we just don’t think about it (my case), because we think they need our charity or because we feel they work for us.

My OBGYN delivered 2 of my 3 kids, was an amazing human and professional. He made sure to move things around so he could be the one performing my C section. He stitched my abdominal muscles without me asking him to so my belly would look flat after the 3rd pregnancy. When I went back for my visit I brought nice cupcakes and pictures of my kids to show my appreciation for all he did for me. I would have never thought of buying a $50 Amazon gift card…

Spouse of a teacher here. And some people do say thanks by food. Also, your doctor makes a lot more than a teacher so that is why you don't give $50 Amazon card!

Teacher should expect the same professionalism as physicians. Which means, they would be offended by being given a gift card for doing their job.

Anonymous wrote:Eh, you sound cheap. No need to justify it.

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Anonymous wrote:Private school teachers are notoriously underpaid. That's why some people do it

So it’s charity. The $500+ in gift cards they get will allow them to buy presents for their kids. I would be humiliated if I were a teacher and this is the reason parents give me gift cards.

So if your boss gives you $500 you would be humiliated? What a strange response!

But it not the boss giving $500 is it?
Any professional outside of teaching would be mortified if the people that are in their care were expected to give them gifts.
But teachers in the US have become so spoiled with gifts, they actually put out into the universe what children/people should gift them. It is so gross and narcissistic.

I don't think you should slam every teacher. My spouse is a teacher and there is no expectation of gifts. Would you suggest that he return the gift card? The homemade fudge and note? Or what? Do you hate teachers? I don't think you would last one day teaching children. my spouse chose the profession because they wanted to teach and change someone's life.

what have you done?

Pay a ton in taxes to pay his wages and raised a responsible child.
He is not a saint or hero, just a person doing a job like the majority of adult humans.
My husband is a cop that keeps you and yours safe, what have you done?

Anonymous wrote:Just chalk it up to a cultural difference. It's pretty clear you aren't trying to understand so do what you want and let it go. If you give a gift card the teacher will not be offended or insulted. If you don't give a gift card, the teacher is not going to look at you any differently. It's fine.