Anonymous
09/09/2023 21:23
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why do you have to drug yourself up to go to the office? Are you well enough to be working at all? Does your employer offer LTD?
Op here. I can work from home no problem, but I have to take breaks.
I wasn’t really well enough to go to the office but felt backed into a corner.
OP, this is difficult to understand. What do you do during your "Breaks" at home that you could not do in the office?
It is not difficult to understand for anyone with a serious chronic health problem.
All travel consumes energy. Healthy people have that energy to spend; many people with disabilities do not because we are using substantial amounts of it on surviving. (In OP’s case, on healing from sepsis, FFS.)
Commuting spends energy in particular ways—the repetition, the alteration to sleep/wake patterns, either having to drive (which is a substantial cognitive burden) or having to use transit (which means a lot of time “in public”—sometimes a problem for those of us with socially problematic symptoms like needing to lie down or quickly find a bathroom. Metro has none BTW.)
A workspace in a home can be set up to meet the priority of getting the work done while also fully accommodating the body of the person doing the work. Shared workspaces aren’t like this; they are designed for default humans who don’t need to do things like lie down intermittently or have immediate access to bathrooms, food, drink and medications.
People here spouting off about getting “welfare” or “going on disability” have no idea how difficult any of the programs implied by those terms are to access.
OP, I am sorry—it all sucks.
Op here. Thank you so much, PP. You explained it better than I could have.
I feel like so many of the replies here are coming from a place of assuming I’m lying. I have an infectious disease that is confirmed by testing and imaging. It’s not possible to fake it. It is fatal in many people. And I’m not even referring to the sepsis, which was a whole other thing.
When I was trying to go to the office, I would pump myself on adderall and sudafed (to amp me up and combat fatigue), plus Vicodin (to deal with pain), and Tylenol to minimize risk of spiking a fever. I’d also bring immodium because when I overdo it, I get diarrhea. The immodium and Vicodin both help with that.
At home, I work in a spare bedroom
With an en suite bathroom
And a bed, plus a fridge with ice packs and snacks. So I’m
Able to just grab what I need. During the 5 minutes it takes to go to the bathroom at the office, I can go in 1 minute at home and then lie in bed for a few minutes. Instead of chit chatting with coworkers, I can lie down and apply ice. On my lunch break, I can take a hot shower. All of this stuff helps immensely.
What infectious disease do you have?
Not OP, but this is not your business!! I wish people would leave OP alone and I don't even have an illness or infectious disease myself. She's not required to tell her employer the disease name to qualify for FMLA. She certainly doesn't need to tell anyone here.
There's nothing the OP can say that won't make the RTO trolls go "haha, you were a sucky employee anyway!"
Anonymous
09/09/2023 21:17
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why do you have to drug yourself up to go to the office? Are you well enough to be working at all? Does your employer offer LTD?
Op here. I can work from home no problem, but I have to take breaks.
I wasn’t really well enough to go to the office but felt backed into a corner.
OP, this is difficult to understand. What do you do during your "Breaks" at home that you could not do in the office?
It is not difficult to understand for anyone with a serious chronic health problem.
All travel consumes energy. Healthy people have that energy to spend; many people with disabilities do not because we are using substantial amounts of it on surviving. (In OP’s case, on healing from sepsis, FFS.)
Commuting spends energy in particular ways—the repetition, the alteration to sleep/wake patterns, either having to drive (which is a substantial cognitive burden) or having to use transit (which means a lot of time “in public”—sometimes a problem for those of us with socially problematic symptoms like needing to lie down or quickly find a bathroom. Metro has none BTW.)
A workspace in a home can be set up to meet the priority of getting the work done while also fully accommodating the body of the person doing the work. Shared workspaces aren’t like this; they are designed for default humans who don’t need to do things like lie down intermittently or have immediate access to bathrooms, food, drink and medications.
People here spouting off about getting “welfare” or “going on disability” have no idea how difficult any of the programs implied by those terms are to access.
OP, I am sorry—it all sucks.
Op here. Thank you so much, PP. You explained it better than I could have.
I feel like so many of the replies here are coming from a place of assuming I’m lying. I have an infectious disease that is confirmed by testing and imaging. It’s not possible to fake it. It is fatal in many people. And I’m not even referring to the sepsis, which was a whole other thing.
When I was trying to go to the office, I would pump myself on adderall and sudafed (to amp me up and combat fatigue), plus Vicodin (to deal with pain), and Tylenol to minimize risk of spiking a fever. I’d also bring immodium because when I overdo it, I get diarrhea. The immodium and Vicodin both help with that.
At home, I work in a spare bedroom
With an en suite bathroom
And a bed, plus a fridge with ice packs and snacks. So I’m
Able to just grab what I need. During the 5 minutes it takes to go to the bathroom at the office, I can go in 1 minute at home and then lie in bed for a few minutes. Instead of chit chatting with coworkers, I can lie down and apply ice. On my lunch break, I can take a hot shower. All of this stuff helps immensely.
What infectious disease do you have?
Not OP, but this is not your business!! I wish people would leave OP alone and I don't even have an illness or infectious disease myself. She's not required to tell her employer the disease name to qualify for FMLA. She certainly doesn't need to tell anyone here.
Anonymous
09/09/2023 21:09
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why do you have to drug yourself up to go to the office? Are you well enough to be working at all? Does your employer offer LTD?
Op here. I can work from home no problem, but I have to take breaks.
I wasn’t really well enough to go to the office but felt backed into a corner.
OP, this is difficult to understand. What do you do during your "Breaks" at home that you could not do in the office?
It is not difficult to understand for anyone with a serious chronic health problem.
All travel consumes energy. Healthy people have that energy to spend; many people with disabilities do not because we are using substantial amounts of it on surviving. (In OP’s case, on healing from sepsis, FFS.)
Commuting spends energy in particular ways—the repetition, the alteration to sleep/wake patterns, either having to drive (which is a substantial cognitive burden) or having to use transit (which means a lot of time “in public”—sometimes a problem for those of us with socially problematic symptoms like needing to lie down or quickly find a bathroom. Metro has none BTW.)
A workspace in a home can be set up to meet the priority of getting the work done while also fully accommodating the body of the person doing the work. Shared workspaces aren’t like this; they are designed for default humans who don’t need to do things like lie down intermittently or have immediate access to bathrooms, food, drink and medications.
People here spouting off about getting “welfare” or “going on disability” have no idea how difficult any of the programs implied by those terms are to access.
OP, I am sorry—it all sucks.
Op here. Thank you so much, PP. You explained it better than I could have.
I feel like so many of the replies here are coming from a place of assuming I’m lying. I have an infectious disease that is confirmed by testing and imaging. It’s not possible to fake it. It is fatal in many people. And I’m not even referring to the sepsis, which was a whole other thing.
When I was trying to go to the office, I would pump myself on adderall and sudafed (to amp me up and combat fatigue), plus Vicodin (to deal with pain), and Tylenol to minimize risk of spiking a fever. I’d also bring immodium because when I overdo it, I get diarrhea. The immodium and Vicodin both help with that.
At home, I work in a spare bedroom
With an en suite bathroom
And a bed, plus a fridge with ice packs and snacks. So I’m
Able to just grab what I need. During the 5 minutes it takes to go to the bathroom at the office, I can go in 1 minute at home and then lie in bed for a few minutes. Instead of chit chatting with coworkers, I can lie down and apply ice. On my lunch break, I can take a hot shower. All of this stuff helps immensely.
What infectious disease do you have?
Anonymous
09/09/2023 20:58
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
“I’ve been in my job for 5 years.
Over the summer, I developed severe health problems (several infections and eventually sepsis) after being healthy my whole life and still being young (early 30s).”
So WFH is what made you sick?? Sounds like RTO would probably be healthier for you.
What’s disappointing about people like you, is that you haven’t even given RTO a chance. Your leadership would possibly be alot more willing to consider meeting you in the middle and maybe at least giving you partial WFH privileges (yes, it is a privilege) if you at least showed up for RTO for awhile and see how it worked out. That shows you’re a team player, which companies like to see.
But you played your weak hand right off the bat, before RTO even went into effect, and you played yourself. I hope you spend this FMLA time brushing up your resume and applying for WFH jobs, because you sure aren’t gaining any favor with the people at your work.
Over the summer, I developed severe health problems (several infections and eventually sepsis) after being healthy my whole life and still being young (early 30s).”
So WFH is what made you sick?? Sounds like RTO would probably be healthier for you.
What’s disappointing about people like you, is that you haven’t even given RTO a chance. Your leadership would possibly be alot more willing to consider meeting you in the middle and maybe at least giving you partial WFH privileges (yes, it is a privilege) if you at least showed up for RTO for awhile and see how it worked out. That shows you’re a team player, which companies like to see.
But you played your weak hand right off the bat, before RTO even went into effect, and you played yourself. I hope you spend this FMLA time brushing up your resume and applying for WFH jobs, because you sure aren’t gaining any favor with the people at your work.
Anonymous
09/09/2023 20:38
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I have quite a few coworkers like OP. What they don't see is that we don't care if she leaves. We're sick of picking up the slack and making it unfair to the rest of us. FMLA is one thing, but constant battles over not working because they can't telework 5 days a week? Just stop. Get a new job already.
Isn't it easier for their coworkers to have them telework 5 days and actually do their work than to come in and leave early (as OP described) or take FMLA (many employers do not hire a temp and just redistribute work loads)? She said the job was remote during the pandemic and allows telework once a week, so it's not like they don't have the capacity for it.
Everyone who I know that's in a rage over lack of remote work is actually NOT doing their work. They think they are. But instead we're relying on other people since we can't ever get ahold of them. They don't get called into last minute meetings like the rest of us and people aren't relying on them for their expertise... people just aren't relying on them to the same extent that they rely on in person people. OP likely will say "good- I can finally get my job done in peace!" but the job wasn't ever that they do one solitary thing. A lot of the job is teamwork.
Shout this from the rooftop!
Anonymous
09/09/2023 20:29
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Anonymous wrote:I have quite a few coworkers like OP. What they don't see is that we don't care if she leaves. We're sick of picking up the slack and making it unfair to the rest of us. FMLA is one thing, but constant battles over not working because they can't telework 5 days a week? Just stop. Get a new job already.
This. Your coworkers and leadership likely find you exhausting at this point and are ready for you to go.
If you’re so confident of your value in the labor pool, then go find yourself a WFH job and stop trying to force your employer to bend to your rules. They’ve already made it clear they don’t want to (nor have to) accommodate you.
You are being quite shortsighted about the whole situation IMO, and you’re not winning yourself any brownie points with anyone either. And let’s say they do let you WFH, guess who would be first on the chopping block when it’s time to trim the budget. You’re just putting a target on your head with this unnecessary battle.
Anonymous
09/09/2023 20:25
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I have quite a few coworkers like OP. What they don't see is that we don't care if she leaves. We're sick of picking up the slack and making it unfair to the rest of us. FMLA is one thing, but constant battles over not working because they can't telework 5 days a week? Just stop. Get a new job already.
Isn't it easier for their coworkers to have them telework 5 days and actually do their work than to come in and leave early (as OP described) or take FMLA (many employers do not hire a temp and just redistribute work loads)? She said the job was remote during the pandemic and allows telework once a week, so it's not like they don't have the capacity for it.
Everyone who I know that's in a rage over lack of remote work is actually NOT doing their work. They think they are. But instead we're relying on other people since we can't ever get ahold of them. They don't get called into last minute meetings like the rest of us and people aren't relying on them for their expertise... people just aren't relying on them to the same extent that they rely on in person people. OP likely will say "good- I can finally get my job done in peace!" but the job wasn't ever that they do one solitary thing. A lot of the job is teamwork.
Anonymous
09/09/2023 20:21
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Anonymous wrote:I have quite a few coworkers like OP. What they don't see is that we don't care if she leaves. We're sick of picking up the slack and making it unfair to the rest of us. FMLA is one thing, but constant battles over not working because they can't telework 5 days a week? Just stop. Get a new job already.
Isn't it easier for their coworkers to have them telework 5 days and actually do their work than to come in and leave early (as OP described) or take FMLA (many employers do not hire a temp and just redistribute work loads)? She said the job was remote during the pandemic and allows telework once a week, so it's not like they don't have the capacity for it.
Anonymous
09/09/2023 20:19
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
I have quite a few coworkers like OP. What they don't see is that we don't care if she leaves. We're sick of picking up the slack and making it unfair to the rest of us. FMLA is one thing, but constant battles over not working because they can't telework 5 days a week? Just stop. Get a new job already.
Anonymous
09/09/2023 20:14
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why do you have to drug yourself up to go to the office? Are you well enough to be working at all? Does your employer offer LTD?
Op here. I can work from home no problem, but I have to take breaks.
I wasn’t really well enough to go to the office but felt backed into a corner.
OP, this is difficult to understand. What do you do during your "Breaks" at home that you could not do in the office?
It is not difficult to understand for anyone with a serious chronic health problem.
All travel consumes energy. Healthy people have that energy to spend; many people with disabilities do not because we are using substantial amounts of it on surviving. (In OP’s case, on healing from sepsis, FFS.)
Commuting spends energy in particular ways—the repetition, the alteration to sleep/wake patterns, either having to drive (which is a substantial cognitive burden) or having to use transit (which means a lot of time “in public”—sometimes a problem for those of us with socially problematic symptoms like needing to lie down or quickly find a bathroom. Metro has none BTW.)
A workspace in a home can be set up to meet the priority of getting the work done while also fully accommodating the body of the person doing the work. Shared workspaces aren’t like this; they are designed for default humans who don’t need to do things like lie down intermittently or have immediate access to bathrooms, food, drink and medications.
People here spouting off about getting “welfare” or “going on disability” have no idea how difficult any of the programs implied by those terms are to access.
OP, I am sorry—it all sucks.
PP you are responding to. I understand chronic health conditions and I also understand reasonable accommodations. And part of that is being able to articulate why a particular accommodation is necessary.
1. OP neither drives not takes public transportation. So none of that is relevant.
2. Repetition and alteration of sleep patterns is, if anything, about work schedule and not work location.
3. Alterations to location (placement near a restroom) or layout of workspace in the office location is a common accommodation.
4. Access to food is...not a thing.
I’m not going into it with you on the numbered points. You are betraying left and right that you actually do not know from chronic health conditions this severe.
The bottom line is: her body has enough energy for working or commuting but not both. When the job is location-flexible, the employer’s general preference to get RTO post-pandemic is not what controls. It is whether the accommodation of telework is unreasonable—a thing they have a much harder time proving now that they’ve done it for the entire shop for years.
How am I betraying that I don’t understand chronic health conditions?
Also, the employer doesn’t have to prove that a requested accommodation is unreasonable until an employee shows that it is something that is needed/optimal o address limitations/conditions associated with a health issue. And even then they have the option of offering an alternative effective accommodation.
Anonymous
09/09/2023 20:10
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
It sounds like you are a very valuable employee. I think if you shop around in this still tight market and note that wfh is non negotiable due to health issues you will land another good fit. Agree that your prior company was dumb to force you out over that but sometimes we find out years later in our career that someone was blackballing you for whatever reason and it’s not even worth trying to figure out what’s going on behind the scenes just move on. Not all management decisions are logical. You have to be in charge of your career and never afraid to jump ships.
Anonymous
09/09/2023 19:58
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why do you have to drug yourself up to go to the office? Are you well enough to be working at all? Does your employer offer LTD?
Op here. I can work from home no problem, but I have to take breaks.
I wasn’t really well enough to go to the office but felt backed into a corner.
OP, this is difficult to understand. What do you do during your "Breaks" at home that you could not do in the office?
It is not difficult to understand for anyone with a serious chronic health problem.
All travel consumes energy. Healthy people have that energy to spend; many people with disabilities do not because we are using substantial amounts of it on surviving. (In OP’s case, on healing from sepsis, FFS.)
Commuting spends energy in particular ways—the repetition, the alteration to sleep/wake patterns, either having to drive (which is a substantial cognitive burden) or having to use transit (which means a lot of time “in public”—sometimes a problem for those of us with socially problematic symptoms like needing to lie down or quickly find a bathroom. Metro has none BTW.)
A workspace in a home can be set up to meet the priority of getting the work done while also fully accommodating the body of the person doing the work. Shared workspaces aren’t like this; they are designed for default humans who don’t need to do things like lie down intermittently or have immediate access to bathrooms, food, drink and medications.
People here spouting off about getting “welfare” or “going on disability” have no idea how difficult any of the programs implied by those terms are to access.
OP, I am sorry—it all sucks.
PP you are responding to. I understand chronic health conditions and I also understand reasonable accommodations. And part of that is being able to articulate why a particular accommodation is necessary.
1. OP neither drives not takes public transportation. So none of that is relevant.
2. Repetition and alteration of sleep patterns is, if anything, about work schedule and not work location.
3. Alterations to location (placement near a restroom) or layout of workspace in the office location is a common accommodation.
4. Access to food is...not a thing.
I’m not going into it with you on the numbered points. You are betraying left and right that you actually do not know from chronic health conditions this severe.
The bottom line is: her body has enough energy for working or commuting but not both. When the job is location-flexible, the employer’s general preference to get RTO post-pandemic is not what controls. It is whether the accommodation of telework is unreasonable—a thing they have a much harder time proving now that they’ve done it for the entire shop for years.
Anonymous
09/09/2023 19:14
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why do you have to drug yourself up to go to the office? Are you well enough to be working at all? Does your employer offer LTD?
Op here. I can work from home no problem, but I have to take breaks.
I wasn’t really well enough to go to the office but felt backed into a corner.
OP, this is difficult to understand. What do you do during your "Breaks" at home that you could not do in the office?
It is not difficult to understand for anyone with a serious chronic health problem.
All travel consumes energy. Healthy people have that energy to spend; many people with disabilities do not because we are using substantial amounts of it on surviving. (In OP’s case, on healing from sepsis, FFS.)
Commuting spends energy in particular ways—the repetition, the alteration to sleep/wake patterns, either having to drive (which is a substantial cognitive burden) or having to use transit (which means a lot of time “in public”—sometimes a problem for those of us with socially problematic symptoms like needing to lie down or quickly find a bathroom. Metro has none BTW.)
A workspace in a home can be set up to meet the priority of getting the work done while also fully accommodating the body of the person doing the work. Shared workspaces aren’t like this; they are designed for default humans who don’t need to do things like lie down intermittently or have immediate access to bathrooms, food, drink and medications.
People here spouting off about getting “welfare” or “going on disability” have no idea how difficult any of the programs implied by those terms are to access.
OP, I am sorry—it all sucks.
PP you are responding to. I understand chronic health conditions and I also understand reasonable accommodations. And part of that is being able to articulate why a particular accommodation is necessary.
1. OP neither drives not takes public transportation. So none of that is relevant.
2. Repetition and alteration of sleep patterns is, if anything, about work schedule and not work location.
3. Alterations to location (placement near a restroom) or layout of workspace in the office location is a common accommodation.
4. Access to food is...not a thing.
Anonymous
09/09/2023 18:32
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Anonymous wrote:OP sounds very young and entitled, with some self centered rage thrown in. I’ve had many management decisions bother me in my career and I’ve either found a new job or stayed and found a way to live with it. Being in a rage because your company isn’t changing their office policies for your personal preferences is childish.
This
Anonymous
09/09/2023 18:29
Subject: Taking FMLA in a rage over RTO
Working from home isn't what your company wants for whatever reason. They get to decide that.
Either go back or find a new job.
Either go back or find a new job.