Anonymous
12/08/2022 18:47
Subject: Matthew Perry
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Perry said a quote that he uses for his sobriety. Maybe it is an AA thing - I don't know. He said the alcoholic drinks the first drink, the addiction / disease drinks the the rest. It sounded like that gave him some feeling of control - that he can't control the disease but he can choose to not take the first sip.
I have no addiction in my family and no addictive tendencies so while I have seen the destructiveness of the illness, it is a hard one to truly understand. I dated someone who didn't drink at all, had never tried it. He had many alcoholics in his family and had seen first hand the impact and he said the only way I 100% know that I will never have a drinking problem is to never take that first drink.
I have some addictive tendencies in my family. My father and my sister both had alcohol issues, but both had a "wake-up" call and were able to stop. Both of them learned from the near fatal incidents that they had to stop completely and that any future drink, even one, could be the last action they ever did. I say this only as a caveat.
I find the above PP's concept hard to understand by any reasonably intelligent person. If you have no history of cancer in your family, do you find a family devastated by cancer hard to understand? Heart disease? Genetic disorders? What I'm saying is that whether or not you have a history of some disease in your family, you can still understand that the disease happens to some people and some families a lot more than to others who may have no history or incident in their family. Yet, people believe and understand that the disease can run in other families and can be devastating to those families. Why is substance addiction that much harder to understand than other diseases?
Most alcoholics/drug users never want to take responsibility for their addiction. Always an excuse to drink. No one makes you go to the store and buy it.
Anonymous
12/08/2022 09:47
Subject: Re:Matthew Perry
I listened to the audio book.
He is honest about how addiction has ruined his life, and how he's lucky to even be alive, after all of the harm he has done to his body. He shares a lot of very embarrassing and shocking anecdotes from his life, resulting from his addiction.
It would probably be good if all teens would read this book, as it would scare anyone straight.
He is honest about how addiction has ruined his life, and how he's lucky to even be alive, after all of the harm he has done to his body. He shares a lot of very embarrassing and shocking anecdotes from his life, resulting from his addiction.
It would probably be good if all teens would read this book, as it would scare anyone straight.
Anonymous
12/07/2022 20:21
Subject: Matthew Perry
Anonymous wrote:Perry said a quote that he uses for his sobriety. Maybe it is an AA thing - I don't know. He said the alcoholic drinks the first drink, the addiction / disease drinks the the rest. It sounded like that gave him some feeling of control - that he can't control the disease but he can choose to not take the first sip.
I have no addiction in my family and no addictive tendencies so while I have seen the destructiveness of the illness, it is a hard one to truly understand. I dated someone who didn't drink at all, had never tried it. He had many alcoholics in his family and had seen first hand the impact and he said the only way I 100% know that I will never have a drinking problem is to never take that first drink.
I have some addictive tendencies in my family. My father and my sister both had alcohol issues, but both had a "wake-up" call and were able to stop. Both of them learned from the near fatal incidents that they had to stop completely and that any future drink, even one, could be the last action they ever did. I say this only as a caveat.
I find the above PP's concept hard to understand by any reasonably intelligent person. If you have no history of cancer in your family, do you find a family devastated by cancer hard to understand? Heart disease? Genetic disorders? What I'm saying is that whether or not you have a history of some disease in your family, you can still understand that the disease happens to some people and some families a lot more than to others who may have no history or incident in their family. Yet, people believe and understand that the disease can run in other families and can be devastating to those families. Why is substance addiction that much harder to understand than other diseases?
Anonymous
12/07/2022 20:03
Subject: Re:Matthew Perry
I'm reading the memoir now and it's a lot like what I imagine the Bojack Horseman memoir to be.
Anonymous
10/31/2022 16:41
Subject: Matthew Perry
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Random question but given how long he was on drugs and to what extent, how did he even pull together this memoir? Not about the writing/crafting the story but how does he even have the info to include? Was he writing in journals?
Usually celebs who write memoirs like this have a lot of support from the publisher - ghost writer, heavy editing, etc. They know it's going to do well so can front the up front investment.
Yeah, I get that, but who even has these details? Like his team is going off or medical and rehab records, triangulated with gossip rags? Just seems like he would be missing very large parts of his life and even in those cases, is a very unreliable narrator.
All of the above. They would interview anyone he could give consent for and access whatever documents they could and then use those to ask him questions. He could still talk about a lot of things. While some aspects can be a blur, he likely still remembers more or less what he did and how he felt during those times and other people fill in the details . confirm facts. He wouldn't have actually written a word. They likely did lots of interviews with him using all the material they could find and then someone writes it all up into a book.
Also, it's not like he was a in a 30 year haze. He clearly had period where he was lucid enough to work.
One of my favorite memoirs is called Girl Walks Out of a Bar and is about this very high functioning addict who was a successful lawyer for YEARS. She drank up a storm but was able to piece together enough hours during the day to get high quality work done. The last few years, she mainly worked remotely but when she had to go in for meetings, she would do cocaine as that would get her up and functioning/on.
The book was fascinating but she clearly was able to function for those years in some capacity. There are a lot of high functioning addicts among us.
My father's best friend would for years start drinking on Thursday nights....but be able to show up to work his exec level job on Fridays, and continue drinking through the day - go on a full bender through the weekend, and function okay Monday through Thursday to work.
Nicest guy - but yes several divorces, and he died of liver cancer in his mid 60s. But actually had a fairly successful exec career for several years even with the drinking.
Execs and remote partners don't actually "work," of course they can be blasted all day.
Anonymous
10/31/2022 14:30
Subject: Matthew Perry
I was on his "side" and hoped for a successful book until I read his comments on Keanu. Now, while I'm glad he's sober, don't care if the book flops or if I ever hear of him again.
Anonymous
10/31/2022 14:25
Subject: Matthew Perry
Taking his word that he's sober. He sounded unwell during the Diane Sawyer interview. Like a recovering stroke victim. Slurring. Combination of brain damage and dental issues from his decades of addiction?
Anonymous
10/31/2022 14:00
Subject: Matthew Perry
Perry said a quote that he uses for his sobriety. Maybe it is an AA thing - I don't know. He said the alcoholic drinks the first drink, the addiction / disease drinks the the rest. It sounded like that gave him some feeling of control - that he can't control the disease but he can choose to not take the first sip.
I have no addiction in my family and no addictive tendencies so while I have seen the destructiveness of the illness, it is a hard one to truly understand. I dated someone who didn't drink at all, had never tried it. He had many alcoholics in his family and had seen first hand the impact and he said the only way I 100% know that I will never have a drinking problem is to never take that first drink.
I have no addiction in my family and no addictive tendencies so while I have seen the destructiveness of the illness, it is a hard one to truly understand. I dated someone who didn't drink at all, had never tried it. He had many alcoholics in his family and had seen first hand the impact and he said the only way I 100% know that I will never have a drinking problem is to never take that first drink.
Anonymous
10/31/2022 13:53
Subject: Matthew Perry
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Random question but given how long he was on drugs and to what extent, how did he even pull together this memoir? Not about the writing/crafting the story but how does he even have the info to include? Was he writing in journals?
Usually celebs who write memoirs like this have a lot of support from the publisher - ghost writer, heavy editing, etc. They know it's going to do well so can front the up front investment.
Yeah, I get that, but who even has these details? Like his team is going off or medical and rehab records, triangulated with gossip rags? Just seems like he would be missing very large parts of his life and even in those cases, is a very unreliable narrator.
All of the above. They would interview anyone he could give consent for and access whatever documents they could and then use those to ask him questions. He could still talk about a lot of things. While some aspects can be a blur, he likely still remembers more or less what he did and how he felt during those times and other people fill in the details . confirm facts. He wouldn't have actually written a word. They likely did lots of interviews with him using all the material they could find and then someone writes it all up into a book.
Also, it's not like he was a in a 30 year haze. He clearly had period where he was lucid enough to work.
One of my favorite memoirs is called Girl Walks Out of a Bar and is about this very high functioning addict who was a successful lawyer for YEARS. She drank up a storm but was able to piece together enough hours during the day to get high quality work done. The last few years, she mainly worked remotely but when she had to go in for meetings, she would do cocaine as that would get her up and functioning/on.
The book was fascinating but she clearly was able to function for those years in some capacity. There are a lot of high functioning addicts among us.
My father's best friend would for years start drinking on Thursday nights....but be able to show up to work his exec level job on Fridays, and continue drinking through the day - go on a full bender through the weekend, and function okay Monday through Thursday to work.
Nicest guy - but yes several divorces, and he died of liver cancer in his mid 60s. But actually had a fairly successful exec career for several years even with the drinking.
Anonymous
10/31/2022 13:52
Subject: Matthew Perry
I saw an interview with him this morning. He talked about wanting to do the book to use the platform he has to better educate people on addiction and to decrease the stigma of talking about it (remove the secrecy and shame) so that people recognize their illness and get help.
He said he had to read it for the audiotaped version and found that very hard to do, to speak it all out loud and to accept that the things he was saying were about him and his life. He said he had to kind of dissociate to get through reading it.
He said he had to read it for the audiotaped version and found that very hard to do, to speak it all out loud and to accept that the things he was saying were about him and his life. He said he had to kind of dissociate to get through reading it.
Anonymous
10/31/2022 12:47
Subject: Matthew Perry
Anonymous wrote:I watched the interview and I think he’s sad that he never married or had kids. His parents divorced, and it seems like he put a lot of stress on himself to make others happy and he was a bit miserable inside his head. Painkillers put him over the edge down the addiction path.
Now he seems like he’s constantly reminding himself it’s not his fault and seemingly trying to find purpose by helping others with his story/book. My takeaway is he’s still struggling inside his head.
He basically said his life would have been completely different had he never taken that one painkiller.
I think he means he wonders about what could have been: wife and kids, movie career, his health, etc.
It’s very sad.
You can see in those first 2-3 seasons of “Friends” how much potential Matthew Perry had. He was very likable and had a natural feel for comedy. He could have been another Tom Hanks. It’s too bad.
Anonymous
10/31/2022 12:11
Subject: Matthew Perry
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Random question but given how long he was on drugs and to what extent, how did he even pull together this memoir? Not about the writing/crafting the story but how does he even have the info to include? Was he writing in journals?
Usually celebs who write memoirs like this have a lot of support from the publisher - ghost writer, heavy editing, etc. They know it's going to do well so can front the up front investment.
Yeah, I get that, but who even has these details? Like his team is going off or medical and rehab records, triangulated with gossip rags? Just seems like he would be missing very large parts of his life and even in those cases, is a very unreliable narrator.
All of the above. They would interview anyone he could give consent for and access whatever documents they could and then use those to ask him questions. He could still talk about a lot of things. While some aspects can be a blur, he likely still remembers more or less what he did and how he felt during those times and other people fill in the details . confirm facts. He wouldn't have actually written a word. They likely did lots of interviews with him using all the material they could find and then someone writes it all up into a book.
Anonymous
10/31/2022 12:08
Subject: Matthew Perry
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Random question but given how long he was on drugs and to what extent, how did he even pull together this memoir? Not about the writing/crafting the story but how does he even have the info to include? Was he writing in journals?
Usually celebs who write memoirs like this have a lot of support from the publisher - ghost writer, heavy editing, etc. They know it's going to do well so can front the up front investment.
Yeah, I get that, but who even has these details? Like his team is going off or medical and rehab records, triangulated with gossip rags? Just seems like he would be missing very large parts of his life and even in those cases, is a very unreliable narrator.
I recently read Brain on Fire where the author/subject of the memoir was psychotic and catatonic for some of the time period. She pieced together what had happened through interviews with friends, family and providers, medical records, etc. Granted she is a journalist
Anonymous
10/31/2022 11:54
Subject: Matthew Perry
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Random question but given how long he was on drugs and to what extent, how did he even pull together this memoir? Not about the writing/crafting the story but how does he even have the info to include? Was he writing in journals?
Usually celebs who write memoirs like this have a lot of support from the publisher - ghost writer, heavy editing, etc. They know it's going to do well so can front the up front investment.
Yeah, I get that, but who even has these details? Like his team is going off or medical and rehab records, triangulated with gossip rags? Just seems like he would be missing very large parts of his life and even in those cases, is a very unreliable narrator.
Anonymous
10/31/2022 11:32
Subject: Matthew Perry
Anonymous wrote:Random question but given how long he was on drugs and to what extent, how did he even pull together this memoir? Not about the writing/crafting the story but how does he even have the info to include? Was he writing in journals?
Usually celebs who write memoirs like this have a lot of support from the publisher - ghost writer, heavy editing, etc. They know it's going to do well so can front the up front investment.