“Mom, the FaceTime calls seem to be causing more stress & tension between us. I don’t like that, so let’s take a break for a little bit. “

Ask him to join for 5 min once a month?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Mom, if Janie and I talking to you on FaceTime doesn't work for you, by all means, we can stop the calls. Jim sometimes says hi, but he's got other things to do, and yeah, sometimes Janie would rather not be on a call. What with her being THREE and all. So if all you're going to do is complain and be 'concerned,' I'll end these calls because they've become a tiresome chore for me. If you can be content with the calls, let me know. It's entirely up to you. If you complain again, I'll know you don't want these calls anymore."

God I hate these suggested dialogues. Do people really speak to other people like this? This is snotty and childish and passive aggressive.

So is OP's mom's behavior. She is literally being snotty and childish and passive aggressive. She can be on the receiving end. For once.

No she isn’t. OP’s DH is a weirdo who can’t say hi for 30 seconds once a week, time and time again, because he’s too scared or introverted or whatever. He’s the one being childish.

The demanding, controlling MIL won't be happy with 30 seconds a week. She wants half and hour. Him sitting straight up in his chair. Her judging. All because she's a narcissist who doesn't care what anyone else wants. Nothing will ever be enough for her. She is needy and mean.

Anonymous wrote:Ugh. “He’s an introvert with mild social anxiety” is a pathetic, made up excuse. Get over it and learn to behave like a normal human. I’m so sick of all the “introvert” crap.

I am not an introvert, I don't have social anxiety, and there is no effin' way I am getting on a group face time once a week with my inlaws (or anyone else, for that matter). Like OP's husband, I'll pop on occasionally to say hi, or share a story, but this would absolutely not be park of my weekly schedule, and the fact that my MIL gets pushy and demands it wouldn't change that. I view it is an unreasonable request, and jumping on periodically as the compromise. There are very few people who have the right to demand my weekly attendance at something.

So in that sense, I kinda agree with the PP, for opposite underlying reasons. If he's busy, or doesn't want to, that's reason enough - no need to fall back on the social anxiety introvert crutch. But I think in this case, the DH is behaving exactly like a normal person - the MIL's demands are absurd.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh. “He’s an introvert with mild social anxiety” is a pathetic, made up excuse. Get over it and learn to behave like a normal human. I’m so sick of all the “introvert” crap.

Nobody cares what you are “so sick of.” You aren’t entitled to order other people around. Period.

Sure I am. You just don’t have to listen to me - go hide under your introvert blanket and cower from simple social interactions if you want to. It’s a free country. I just find it annoying.