are you on crack? no!

I posted earlier in the thread that we bought 1.2 on 300k hhi.
We put down about 30% and had two kids in daycare for 24k per kid a year (posted 12k for some reason). Our mortgage was like 5700 when we first got in the house. It was tight with daycare. We had a “fund” we had saved up and slowly burnt it down over 3 years to offset the costs when needed.

Fast forward 11 years and mortgage is closer to 6200 (property tax increases from home appreciation).

We are fortunate now that daycare/nanny days are behind us; income has gone up. BUT in the last 2 years we have replaced the furnaces and both ac for 25k (house is now 11 years old).

If that would have happened when we first moved in it would have been a hard pill to swallow. We had cash on hand (like if we lost a job) for emergency and we would have had to hit that or take out a loan for the hvac. Now we just write a check and, while it sucks, does not impact much financially.

Our net now monthly is around 23k after all the usual insurance, retirement; etc. our mortgage fits our income much better than it did a decade or so ago. So if you expect to
Be 400-500k range hhi if you plan for it and have cash on hand after down payment it may be doable.

Fwiw we had an emergency fund of 100k and 50k daycare fund after putting 30% down, and about 60k to put into the house for blinds and all the stuff you need for a new build.

Op here. I'm grateful that my question has spurred so much conversation. My takeaway is the $9K PITI won't allow us to have a buffer for huge unexpected purchases that we've been lucky to avoid these last few years.

I'd like to address some of the recurring themes:

- On 300(ish) K gross, we pay about: 40K for 401K, 65K for federal+state+fica taxes, 10K for HSA + insurance = about 115K total. Even if we made exactly 300K, that still leaves 185/12 = 15.5K per month. I don't see why my estimate of "just under $16K" is incredible. Perhaps other folks are withholding too much? or not itemizing?

- As discussed in a previous post, we spend about $6K per month outside PITI and utilities. That's $72K per year - more than what most households' gross income. I don't see why our spending habits are unbelievable. I would say that our lifestyle is similar to when we made <$200K... so our lifestyle has not crept up with our income.

- as for why we "need" a 4000sqft house - we need offices. We are both WFH for the foreseeable future, and our children are at an age where they need their own computers, and we don't want computers in their bedrooms, and no one wants to share an office. So ideally we need 4 more rooms to have as offices. I'm tired of zooming on the kitchen table.

- there are separate discussions about funding your kids' colleges that deserve their own thread. I might ask those parents who are giving an 18yo $200K and tell them to choose their lifetime career to reconsider. I know I would rather have my kids have some skin in the game when they make their choices about college and major. Then maybe they might be surprised with a $200K loan payoff or down payment gift after they graduate. Who knows?

Anonymous wrote:Someone explain the math to me how OP is having $6k leftover on her current budget.

By my rough math, $300k is about $13k/month take home after maxing 2 401k’s, HSA, and 529s, and taxes. Take out $3500 for her current PITI, gets her to $9500. For her to save $6k/month she is only spending $3500/month. This includes all utilities, internet and cellphones. Home maintenance, food, dining out, kids activities, gifts, travel, and saving for buying cars with cash since OP says she doesn’t have car payments.

It’s just not adding up to me. We make a similar income and don’t live a fancy life and have at best a couple thousand left over, not $6k! I’d love to know the secret because I’m not seeing it.

I don't think it's hard to not spend 3k a month. It's really the surprises. A new 10k AC system etc.

OP is asking from an investment standpoint!
Again- go talk to someone knowledgeable! Not us yahoos

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone explain the math to me how OP is having $6k leftover on her current budget.

By my rough math, $300k is about $13k/month take home after maxing 2 401k’s, HSA, and 529s, and taxes. Take out $3500 for her current PITI, gets her to $9500. For her to save $6k/month she is only spending $3500/month. This includes all utilities, internet and cellphones. Home maintenance, food, dining out, kids activities, gifts, travel, and saving for buying cars with cash since OP says she doesn’t have car payments.

It’s just not adding up to me. We make a similar income and don’t live a fancy life and have at best a couple thousand left over, not $6k! I’d love to know the secret because I’m not seeing it.

I'm not saying the OP's budget is easy, but $3,500/month for all recurring expenses after mortgage doesn't sound impossible if they're relatively frugal. That's $40,000/year. Enough for $2,000/month in groceries, $1,000/month in utilities/internet/etc and $500/month for saving. Maybe they don't travel or dine out much (hard with kids anyway).

I could see how this could be possible as well, but I do wonder: if $3500/month for all recurring expenses after mortgage is enough for OP’s lifestyle, which it sounds is relatively frugal by DCUM standards, why the upgrade to a 4000 sq ft home? I’ve always just assumed that people who are interested in larger homes are interested in them because they want things like a dedicated exercise room for their home gym equipment, a rec room/movie room, extra space to store decorations for every holiday, bigger closets, etc. In other words, space for stuff. If someone isn’t spending to acquire a lot of things, then do they really need space for a lot of things? I’m confused!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone explain the math to me how OP is having $6k leftover on her current budget.

By my rough math, $300k is about $13k/month take home after maxing 2 401k’s, HSA, and 529s, and taxes. Take out $3500 for her current PITI, gets her to $9500. For her to save $6k/month she is only spending $3500/month. This includes all utilities, internet and cellphones. Home maintenance, food, dining out, kids activities, gifts, travel, and saving for buying cars with cash since OP says she doesn’t have car payments.

It’s just not adding up to me. We make a similar income and don’t live a fancy life and have at best a couple thousand left over, not $6k! I’d love to know the secret because I’m not seeing it.

I think OP posted on the thread saying they aren’t funding kids college so maybe taking out the 529 contributions gets you closer?

The OP mentions 529 savings.

Right, but only $4k. That's not really funding college.

We we are saving $1600/month ($800/per kid) but that still doesn’t get me to the $6k excess OP references. And also, cars. Eventually one or both of them will need a new car. Are they saving for it? Planning to have a car payment?

I wouldn't beat your head against a wall here; her numbers don't add up. She says they bring home $16k/month at $300k, which doesn't line up with my experience at that HHI or your assumptions above, or anyone else's experience who has commented.

Yes I agree the numbers don’t add up. I only know because our income is very similar.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eh, it may be possible.
When we were at 300k range we bought at 1.2 and were freaked out. We had 2 kids in daycare for 24k a year (12k each).

It was tight for couple of years. Kids in school and incomes over 400k now no worries.

12k each for daycare? How long ago was this? Twenty years?

It was 24k each kid: so 48k a year in child care.

poster had said specifically 12k each.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone explain the math to me how OP is having $6k leftover on her current budget.

By my rough math, $300k is about $13k/month take home after maxing 2 401k’s, HSA, and 529s, and taxes. Take out $3500 for her current PITI, gets her to $9500. For her to save $6k/month she is only spending $3500/month. This includes all utilities, internet and cellphones. Home maintenance, food, dining out, kids activities, gifts, travel, and saving for buying cars with cash since OP says she doesn’t have car payments.

It’s just not adding up to me. We make a similar income and don’t live a fancy life and have at best a couple thousand left over, not $6k! I’d love to know the secret because I’m not seeing it.

I think OP posted on the thread saying they aren’t funding kids college so maybe taking out the 529 contributions gets you closer?

The OP mentions 529 savings.

Right, but only $4k. That's not really funding college.

We we are saving $1600/month ($800/per kid) but that still doesn’t get me to the $6k excess OP references. And also, cars. Eventually one or both of them will need a new car. Are they saving for it? Planning to have a car payment?

I wouldn't beat your head against a wall here; her numbers don't add up. She says they bring home $16k/month at $300k, which doesn't line up with my experience at that HHI or your assumptions above, or anyone else's experience who has commented.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone explain the math to me how OP is having $6k leftover on her current budget.

By my rough math, $300k is about $13k/month take home after maxing 2 401k’s, HSA, and 529s, and taxes. Take out $3500 for her current PITI, gets her to $9500. For her to save $6k/month she is only spending $3500/month. This includes all utilities, internet and cellphones. Home maintenance, food, dining out, kids activities, gifts, travel, and saving for buying cars with cash since OP says she doesn’t have car payments.

It’s just not adding up to me. We make a similar income and don’t live a fancy life and have at best a couple thousand left over, not $6k! I’d love to know the secret because I’m not seeing it.

I think OP posted on the thread saying they aren’t funding kids college so maybe taking out the 529 contributions gets you closer?

The OP mentions 529 savings.

Right, but only $4k. That's not really funding college.

We we are saving $1600/month ($800/per kid) but that still doesn’t get me to the $6k excess OP references. And also, cars. Eventually one or both of them will need a new car. Are they saving for it? Planning to have a car payment?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone explain the math to me how OP is having $6k leftover on her current budget.

By my rough math, $300k is about $13k/month take home after maxing 2 401k’s, HSA, and 529s, and taxes. Take out $3500 for her current PITI, gets her to $9500. For her to save $6k/month she is only spending $3500/month. This includes all utilities, internet and cellphones. Home maintenance, food, dining out, kids activities, gifts, travel, and saving for buying cars with cash since OP says she doesn’t have car payments.

It’s just not adding up to me. We make a similar income and don’t live a fancy life and have at best a couple thousand left over, not $6k! I’d love to know the secret because I’m not seeing it.

I think OP posted on the thread saying they aren’t funding kids college so maybe taking out the 529 contributions gets you closer?

The OP mentions 529 savings.

Right, but only $4k. That's not really funding college.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone explain the math to me how OP is having $6k leftover on her current budget.

By my rough math, $300k is about $13k/month take home after maxing 2 401k’s, HSA, and 529s, and taxes. Take out $3500 for her current PITI, gets her to $9500. For her to save $6k/month she is only spending $3500/month. This includes all utilities, internet and cellphones. Home maintenance, food, dining out, kids activities, gifts, travel, and saving for buying cars with cash since OP says she doesn’t have car payments.

It’s just not adding up to me. We make a similar income and don’t live a fancy life and have at best a couple thousand left over, not $6k! I’d love to know the secret because I’m not seeing it.

I think OP posted on the thread saying they aren’t funding kids college so maybe taking out the 529 contributions gets you closer?

The OP mentions 529 savings.

Anonymous wrote:Someone explain the math to me how OP is having $6k leftover on her current budget.

By my rough math, $300k is about $13k/month take home after maxing 2 401k’s, HSA, and 529s, and taxes. Take out $3500 for her current PITI, gets her to $9500. For her to save $6k/month she is only spending $3500/month. This includes all utilities, internet and cellphones. Home maintenance, food, dining out, kids activities, gifts, travel, and saving for buying cars with cash since OP says she doesn’t have car payments.

It’s just not adding up to me. We make a similar income and don’t live a fancy life and have at best a couple thousand left over, not $6k! I’d love to know the secret because I’m not seeing it.

I think OP posted on the thread saying they aren’t funding kids college so maybe taking out the 529 contributions gets you closer?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone explain the math to me how OP is having $6k leftover on her current budget.

By my rough math, $300k is about $13k/month take home after maxing 2 401k’s, HSA, and 529s, and taxes. Take out $3500 for her current PITI, gets her to $9500. For her to save $6k/month she is only spending $3500/month. This includes all utilities, internet and cellphones. Home maintenance, food, dining out, kids activities, gifts, travel, and saving for buying cars with cash since OP says she doesn’t have car payments.

It’s just not adding up to me. We make a similar income and don’t live a fancy life and have at best a couple thousand left over, not $6k! I’d love to know the secret because I’m not seeing it.

I'm not saying the OP's budget is easy, but $3,500/month for all recurring expenses after mortgage doesn't sound impossible if they're relatively frugal. That's $40,000/year. Enough for $2,000/month in groceries, $1,000/month in utilities/internet/etc and $500/month for saving. Maybe they don't travel or dine out much (hard with kids anyway).

Without car payments they will either need to eventually take on a car payment or pay for a new car in cash. What about when the HVAC dies?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eh, it may be possible.
When we were at 300k range we bought at 1.2 and were freaked out. We had 2 kids in daycare for 24k a year (12k each).

It was tight for couple of years. Kids in school and incomes over 400k now no worries.

12k each for daycare? How long ago was this? Twenty years?

It was 24k each kid: so 48k a year in child care.