Dab a little of your own unique scent behind your ears.

JDBF

(just don't be fat)

Literally nothing else matters

I love how this thread is 90% either women complaining about what other women have wrote or women womansplaining what men really find attractive.

It is a dumb question.

We don't want to hear what men think. We already know. Be cute and fit, consistently pleasant, and focused on meeting the individual man's particular needs.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's one that everyone knows, but no one will admit. Dye your hair blonde. It makes a huge difference. For example, the same actress playing Daenerys in GOT vs her with her actual hair color.

That platinum hair looked completely weird and unnatural on her. Emilia Clarke is a very pretty brunette.

First, I disagree - Emilia Clarke is stumpy with weird body proportions and a swollen looking face. However, I am totally not attracted to blondes. I either white women with dark hair or asian/latin/indian or some mix of these races/ethnicities. Guys that go for blondes are basic

Anonymous wrote:Here's one that everyone knows, but no one will admit. Dye your hair blonde. It makes a huge difference. For example, the same actress playing Daenerys in GOT vs her with her actual hair color.

That platinum hair looked completely weird and unnatural on her. Emilia Clarke is a very pretty brunette.

Anonymous wrote:If you want to attract a man, do not take the advice of women- especially anonymous women on DCUM. Go and observe women who attract men. Then, copy them.
Predicting you will see some common themes:
smiling, clothes that are flattering/feminine and look easy to take off, long hair that is “touchable”, not talking too loud or too much or too negatively, appearing confident, wearing makeup but not looking like a drag queen …
For the most part, guys in real life don’t expect perfection. They expect sex and attention.
You don’t have to be a supermodel. You don’t need cosmetic procedures unless it’s what YOU want. Invest in your hair and your face and dress for your body. Wear a padded bra if you don’t have big boobs. Get your teeth as white as they can be and smile a lot. Act like you are hot - guys will think you are hot.

Ew.

Anonymous wrote:Everyone's going to say stay in shape and don't wear too much makeup.

This... It's not complicated. Don't overthink it.

Anonymous wrote:Shockingly, this thread seems to show that different people have different views about what is attractive! Embrace yourself and you'll find the lid for your pot

Not shockingly at all, every woman in this thread thinks that what men should find attractive is a woman of exactly her age, weight, and appearance.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
It's not shallow because any woman who has stopped caring about her appearance is guaranteed to have much deeper problems than just her uncared-for appearance. And if she doesn't care about her appearance, how much do you think she will care about you?

The fundamental problem with this argument is that someone leaving their natural color is "stopping caring" about her appearance. There is a point where it looks ridiculous for someone to have blond or black hair.

That point is nowhere before the age of 60. But you commonly see it in women who are not even 40 or 50. It does not require much effort to color your hair. They simply stopped caring.

I am one of those women, and no, I didn't stop caring. I just never cared about what you think to begin with.

Great! Enjoy your cats. Tiddles, you don't care what color mommy's hair is, do you sweetums?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If women have any gray hair - keep it colored.

Nothing screams “I do not care how bad I look now - I am just O-L-D!!” than a woman who is letting her gray roots grow in or has that dull, gray dishwater colored hair.

Keeping your grays properly colored (even if it has to be done every ten days or so) shows a man that you care.
It keeps you looking polished and shows that you are not ready yet to let your old age take over you.

However after 65+, you can let your grays show.
Because at that stage of life, everyone and their Mother know that you likely are 💯% gray and that even if you color your mane, your skin will contradict it.

Said no man, ever.

This is written by a woman, as, I suspect, most of these comments.

I doubt it. I'm a man, and I agree with it. Gray hair is how women over 35 say, "I've given up".

I know a guy who told me that he knew it was shallow, but hated that the woman he was dating didn't color her grey hair. She was in late 40s. I said. "yeah, don't ever say that out loud again."

It's not shallow because any woman who has stopped caring about her appearance is guaranteed to have much deeper problems than just her uncared-for appearance. And if she doesn't care about her appearance, how much do you think she will care about you?

Quite the contrary. They're choosing to spend more time on the meaningful things.

Apparently attracting men is not a "meaningful thing" to her.

Anonymous wrote:If you want to attract a man, do not take the advice of women- especially anonymous women on DCUM. Go and observe women who attract men. Then, copy them.
Predicting you will see some common themes:
smiling, clothes that are flattering/feminine and look easy to take off, long hair that is “touchable”, not talking too loud or too much or too negatively, appearing confident, wearing makeup but not looking like a drag queen …
For the most part, guys in real life don’t expect perfection. They expect sex and attention.
You don’t have to be a supermodel. You don’t need cosmetic procedures unless it’s what YOU want. Invest in your hair and your face and dress for your body. Wear a padded bra if you don’t have big boobs. Get your teeth as white as they can be and smile a lot. Act like you are hot - guys will think you are hot.

The problem with this advice is that almost all women on the entire planet attract men. Some more than others, obviously. But putting on an act to get a man is soooo cringey.

I do think you are right about a lot of what you say with most of this. But its not necessary to be like this to attract a man. Like, I talk too loud and sometimes too much. Those are not my husbands’ favorite things about me, but I still attracted many of the kind of guys women on DCUM are always wondering how they can attract and I married a great one (high-earning, fit, funny, good dad, caring, works around the house, etc). One of his favorite qualities about me is my authenticity. I don’t try to be somebody I’m not. I always knew I wasn’t going to be attractive to every man out there.

I think you are also spot on about the “act like you are hot” thing. But you don’t have to copy others to do that.

And I do apologize for taking up space on this thread as a woman but I feel like since I attracted such a great guy I have some insight that could help OP.

I will never understand why people ask this question--if you ask 1000 men you will get at least 700 different answers.

Some men like thin women, some men like thick women. The same can be said for long hair or short hair.

Some men have a "type" and seem to be attracted to the same attributes while others have dated women who are very different from each other.

Most men I know are attracted to confidence and happiness. Being with a mopey, perpetually pissed off person is not fun for anyone of any gender.

Anonymous wrote:Shockingly, this thread seems to show that different people have different views about what is attractive! Embrace yourself and you'll find the lid for your pot

Nah, for most men, it's starts to cluster around a few key things.

A lot of the "variation" you see in this thread are women trying to self-validate. Please.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am 43 and have very short gray hair. I am fit and dress well and no one is going to look at me and say “she gave up”.
Then again, I am also not at all interested in attracting men. I don’t need one.

Then why are you in this thread?

DP. This is what DCUM is about. Opinions from all different kinds of people on all kinds of different topics.

Reponses like yours add nothing to the conversation and just waste space.

No, read the OP. Nobody is asking for her thread-cluttering opinion so she can feel good about herself. Enjoy your hobbies, Susan!