Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two pages in, and I really wonder about OP. Buying a drink for the ex DH is perfectly fine. Beyond that it sounds like she tries to goad him into jealousy and he's onto her games.

If he's narcissistic then surely there are other areas where it is a problem which raises the question for me of why OP focuses on his lack of showing jealousy.

yeah, is she bragging here or complaining? and doesn’t take kindly to any criticism
I too think her dh is playing her, good for him, let her fidget

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two pages in, and I really wonder about OP. Buying a drink for the ex DH is perfectly fine. Beyond that it sounds like she tries to goad him into jealousy and he's onto her games.

If he's narcissistic then surely there are other areas where it is a problem which raises the question for me of why OP focuses on his lack of showing jealousy.

Why do you think that?

Anonymous wrote:Two pages in, and I really wonder about OP. Buying a drink for the ex DH is perfectly fine. Beyond that it sounds like she tries to goad him into jealousy and he's onto her games.

If he's narcissistic then surely there are other areas where it is a problem which raises the question for me of why OP focuses on his lack of showing jealousy.

Anonymous wrote:What IS the obsession American men have with being alpha or beta. Loser mentality.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife dated one of my friends before we got together, and I dated one of her roommates. Both of them were at our wedding and we went to their respective weddings.. What’s the big deal?

You’re way too mature in your thinking to be on this thread.

Anonymous wrote:How many books/movies have been made about this exact phenomenon? The older, complacent husband/boyfriend, who thought his wealth/former physical attractiveness would inoculate him from other men. Who arrogantly refused to think about his wife's perspective or the appeal of other men. And who's wife left him as a result. Since Leo Tolstoy's time, at the bare minimum.

Tale as old as time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't an insecure guy get upset in the above situations? Instead of not caring.

No. A secure man certainly wouldnt want to buy a drink for a man who's been all up in the guts of his wife. LOL. So embarrassing

You must be a woman because you have no idea about male confidence. I’d buy my wife’s former boyfriend a drink. It’s ridiculous to think that somehow shows a lack of confidence.

I'm not. You must be a beta though.

Haha. You’re the beta. A former boyfriend doesn’t bother me. If it bothers you so much who’s the one with the insecurity issue? Confident men don’t let a woman’s past bother them.

Loser alert. you've probably been cheated on multiple times. What a pathetic joke of a person.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I have been with him for a quarter of a century. I can tell you he is very confident. So much so that it pisses me off. He thinks he can do anything. He thinks he is great looking (he is decent but he over inflates his looks). Physically he thinks he is so ao strong. Maybe if you have not dealt with this....you wouldn't understand.

If he was insecure, I would have picked up on it.

When other men talk to me...it's as if he thinks they wouldn't stand a chance because he is so much better

Op, I am like your DH. Tall, attractive (I probably think i am better looking than I am 😃). It doesn't bother me if my wife talks with other men or goes out with them solo. I trust her and I definitely have the "she isn't doing better than me" attitude.

There are a lot of insecure incels on here projecting on your DH and guys like me. We just aren't the jealous type. And it's not necessarily a great trait, I have had many women who I have dated tell me it feels like I don't care if they stay or go. The truth is, of course I love my wife but I would be fine on the dating market if single. That's probably the vibe your DH gives. Some women find it sexy, others feel the need to be possessed. We are not for everyone

Yes, they dont like it because it's not strong male energy, and heterosexual women are attracted to male energy. The complacent "shrug, whatever happens is fine" attitude is very feminine and feminine women are going to be repelled. It's simply not masculine and those who are attracted to masculinity are going to be repelled/annoyed by you because youre not masculine. But you dont seem to care about much in life regardless and seem complacent so whatever... not trying to be mean but it is what it is.

I don't know you and you don't know me, and I am only saying this to help OP and give her some perspective so she can get insight.

Two things I am absolutely confident about: I have slept with way, way more women than you. That doesn't make me better or worse than you or other men but it defeats your idiotic theory of feminine energy. 2) you are the same poster replying to yourself and ruining an interesting thread where women actually want insight as to why their husbands don't seem to get jealous.

It's not a rare trait, and in fact among my friends who are attractive and super successful it's more of the norm. But I guess we are all beta cuck Democrat closet gays or whatever is the latest political insult

Anonymous wrote:Jealousy is the sign of a controlling a$$hole. One of the reasons I divorced my ex was b/c she was extremely jealous. Every woman in my life was a threat to her and mes to extreme levels of paranoia. She once called a co-worker of mine and accused her of f**king me and telling her - she was AA - to find other white men. It was awful.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I know this is a good thing. But we have been married 23 years and I have never seen him be jealous. I'm curious if this is normal? It's bit annoying.

When we bumped into my ex...he bought him a drink.
When a guy hits on me (not recent), he was never jealous or bothered.

Sounds like he's a beta male. Is he physically weak? Could most men beat him in a fight? Is he weak, small, short, shrimpy, or overweight?

Is he mentally/emotionally beta? Does he desperately seek out the approval of other men?

I think that's probably what it is. He knows he'll lose in a fight and he values the approval of other dudes over his woman. Textbook beta

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I know this is a good thing. But we have been married 23 years and I have never seen him be jealous. I'm curious if this is normal? It's bit annoying.

When we bumped into my ex...he bought him a drink.
When a guy hits on me (not recent), he was never jealous or bothered.

Sounds like he's a beta male. Is he physically weak? Could most men beat him in a fight? Is he weak, small, short, shrimpy, or overweight?

Is he mentally/emotionally beta? Does he desperately seek out the approval of other men?

I think that's probably what it is. He knows he'll lose in a fight and he values the approval of other dudes over his woman. Textbook beta

Lol
No. He has worked put his whole life. He has solid muscles and he is 6 ft 3in. He is not wimpy, has a black belt in Aikido. Active, fit.

But we didnt just ask about the physical....

No. He doesn't usually care about appricak from others especially people he barely knows. He is a go getter. I would not call him beta at all. He is driven. I think he is just super confident

I dont know, I'm getting beta vibes tbh. You may be wanting to see him with rose colored glasses since he's your husband. But this is definitely beta behavior. Sorry OP, it just is. I think you want him to be something he's not and never can be

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I have been with him for a quarter of a century. I can tell you he is very confident. So much so that it pisses me off. He thinks he can do anything. He thinks he is great looking (he is decent but he over inflates his looks). Physically he thinks he is so ao strong. Maybe if you have not dealt with this....you wouldn't understand.

If he was insecure, I would have picked up on it.

When other men talk to me...it's as if he thinks they wouldn't stand a chance because he is so much better

Op, I am like your DH. Tall, attractive (I probably think i am better looking than I am 😃). It doesn't bother me if my wife talks with other men or goes out with them solo. I trust her and I definitely have the "she isn't doing better than me" attitude.

There are a lot of insecure incels on here projecting on your DH and guys like me. We just aren't the jealous type. And it's not necessarily a great trait, I have had many women who I have dated tell me it feels like I don't care if they stay or go. The truth is, of course I love my wife but I would be fine on the dating market if single. That's probably the vibe your DH gives. Some women find it sexy, others feel the need to be possessed. We are not for everyone

Yes, they dont like it because it's not strong male energy, and heterosexual women are attracted to male energy. The complacent "shrug, whatever happens is fine" attitude is very feminine and feminine women are going to be repelled. It's simply not masculine and those who are attracted to masculinity are going to be repelled/annoyed by you because youre not masculine. But you dont seem to care about much in life regardless and seem complacent so whatever... not trying to be mean but it is what it is.