Anonymous wrote:How do you know? I gave each of them a debilitating disease which will be made evident in their old age!!

- GOD

I see. What did St. Jude's pediatric patients do that you burdened them with the same?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Society has moved on from old-fashioned religiously-imposed notions of some sort of sanctity of marriage. Handle your own relationship as you see fit but do not force your own sense of “morality” on others. MYOB. You people are such busy bodies, judging others.

AMEN!

Please see post above yours. Lying and cheating is poor character and integrity. It has nothing to do with religion.

If you want a polyamorous lifestyle, be open about it. Do not deceive someone and risk their physical and emotional harm. If you do, you are a scumbag.
AMEN!!

You can't Amen yourself. It doesn't work like that.

Why not? Are you the Amen police??
AMEN!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Society has moved on from old-fashioned religiously-imposed notions of some sort of sanctity of marriage. Handle your own relationship as you see fit but do not force your own sense of “morality” on others. MYOB. You people are such busy bodies, judging others.

AMEN!

Please see post above yours. Lying and cheating is poor character and integrity. It has nothing to do with religion.

If you want a polyamorous lifestyle, be open about it. Do not deceive someone and risk their physical and emotional harm. If you do, you are a scumbag.
AMEN!!

You can't Amen yourself. It doesn't work like that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I recently finished reading Esther Perel's "Mating in Captivity." What a great book. I found the following observation very interesting.

A woman can engage in serial monogamy: get married, get divorced, engage in a few intra-marital sexual liaisons, get married again and we're someho w all fine with that, but a man in a 20 plus year marriage who has a ONS is a cheater!

Whyever not be fine with it? First, no reason to include gender. Both situations can happen to either gender. And the first situation described is completely legit. I don’t think sex is immoral. I don’t think ONS are immoral if you are single. But if you are married and have a ONS without permission, then yes, a problem. I don’t think divorce and remarriage is immoral. So the first situation is completely moral and ethically fine. But the second situation involves lying and cheating. Clearly another beast altogether. Your implying otherwise is simply wrong

(NP) Unlike some, I actually like some of what Perel writes. But this particular quote makes no sense to me at all. I seem nothing morally or socially problematic with the first scenario in any respect (it doesn't even mention children). She seems to think that just the end of a relationship in and of itself (or sex with a different person?) is somehow a wrong. Which might appeal if you are a marriage counselor, but I do not get at all.

How do you know? I gave each of them a debilitating disease which will be made evident in their old age!!

- GOD

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Society has moved on from old-fashioned religiously-imposed notions of some sort of sanctity of marriage. Handle your own relationship as you see fit but do not force your own sense of “morality” on others. MYOB. You people are such busy bodies, judging others.

AMEN!

Please see post above yours. Lying and cheating is poor character and integrity. It has nothing to do with religion.

If you want a polyamorous lifestyle, be open about it. Do not deceive someone and risk their physical and emotional harm. If you do, you are a scumbag.
AMEN!!

Anonymous wrote:Society has moved on from old-fashioned religiously-imposed notions of some sort of sanctity of marriage. Handle your own relationship as you see fit but do not force your own sense of “morality” on others. MYOB. You people are such busy bodies, judging others.

AMEN!

You don’t have to be religious to expect fidelity, trust and honesty when you both commit to monogamy. Basic morality means you shouldn’t lie to someone’s face, gaslight them and expose them to disease and non-monogamy without their consent.

It calls into somebody’s character and integrity when they are a lying, cheat.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I recently finished reading Esther Perel's "Mating in Captivity." What a great book. I found the following observation very interesting.

A woman can engage in serial monogamy: get married, get divorced, engage in a few intra-marital sexual liaisons, get married again and we're someho w all fine with that, but a man in a 20 plus year marriage who has a ONS is a cheater!

Why wouldn’t we be fine with that? One is infidelity. The other is not.

Actually, if we are to take the words of Jesus in Matthew 19:9 into account, the woman (or man) who divorces her/his spouse and marries another also commits adultery. So, in the Christian context, there is no difference.

Not everybody believes the Bible is the word of God. I think most people know it is the word of man. So there is that. Please don’t impose your religious beliefs one everybody else.

Society has moved on from old-fashioned religiously-imposed notions of some sort of sanctity of marriage. Handle your own relationship as you see fit but do not force your own sense of “morality” on others. MYOB. You people are such busy bodies, judging others.

Why do you care, OP? If these two individuals found love with each other, then let it be. It's too bad they couldn't have handled it more honestly, but they wouldn't have ended up together if either one of their needs were being met by their original partners.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I recently finished reading Esther Perel's "Mating in Captivity." What a great book. I found the following observation very interesting.

A woman can engage in serial monogamy: get married, get divorced, engage in a few intra-marital sexual liaisons, get married again and we're someho w all fine with that, but a man in a 20 plus year marriage who has a ONS is a cheater!

Why wouldn’t we be fine with that? One is infidelity. The other is not.

Actually, if we are to take the words of Jesus in Matthew 19:9 into account, the woman (or man) who divorces her/his spouse and marries another also commits adultery. So, in the Christian context, there is no difference.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Is it just a handful of posters who post incessantly about how cheaters are the worse? I don't get it. No one I know in real life harbors such seething resentment.

Yes, I have come to believe there is one open marriage poster on one extreme and one EVIL CHEATING on the other extreme they basically argue with each other. Perhaps they are ex spouses.

And a poster who thinks all fat people deserve to be unloved and celibate

It’s not one poster.

A Gallup poll conducted found that 91% of Americans consider it to be either always or almost always wrong for married people to have sexual relations with someone other than their spouses, and in response to a separate but related question, 89% say that "married men and women having an affair" is morally unacceptable. Unlike many sexual mores in American society, intolerance of infidelity has actually grown over the last two decades

Of course every cheater makes up some reason to justify it for themselves.

I would agree cheating is morally wrong and I have cheated. It's more a matter of degree

Do you believe that those who do things that are morally wrong should have to face some kind of consequence for it? Like some kind of cosmic justice or something (assuming you're not religious).

Yes.

I’m sorry, but that seems delusional at best.

Suffering is not meted out according to desert. Plenty of good people suffer. Plenty of people who do horrific things don’t.

Punishment is something humans developed to enforce social norms. Therefore in places where cheating is socially acceptable or normalized, we won’t see any repercussions. And in every society the wealthy, the elite, and the men are much more likely not to have punishments enforced because the social cost of doing so would be too high. Traditionally only women and people without the option to fight back are sanctioned for this behavior. It’s changing slightly with social media, which places reputational costs on even very powerful individuals, but that’s a mechanism that is fairly inefficient compared to others.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Is it just a handful of posters who post incessantly about how cheaters are the worse? I don't get it. No one I know in real life harbors such seething resentment.

Yes, I have come to believe there is one open marriage poster on one extreme and one EVIL CHEATING on the other extreme they basically argue with each other. Perhaps they are ex spouses.

And a poster who thinks all fat people deserve to be unloved and celibate

It’s not one poster.

A Gallup poll conducted found that 91% of Americans consider it to be either always or almost always wrong for married people to have sexual relations with someone other than their spouses, and in response to a separate but related question, 89% say that "married men and women having an affair" is morally unacceptable. Unlike many sexual mores in American society, intolerance of infidelity has actually grown over the last two decades

Of course every cheater makes up some reason to justify it for themselves.

I would agree cheating is morally wrong and I have cheated. It's more a matter of degree

Do you believe that those who do things that are morally wrong should have to face some kind of consequence for it? Like some kind of cosmic justice or something (assuming you're not religious).

Yes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Is it just a handful of posters who post incessantly about how cheaters are the worse? I don't get it. No one I know in real life harbors such seething resentment.

Yes, I have come to believe there is one open marriage oh poster on one extreme and one EVIL CHEATING on the other extreme they basically argue with each other. Perhaps they are ex spouses.

And a poster who thinks all fat people deserve to be unloved and celibate

It’s not one poster.

A Gallup poll conducted found that 91% of Americans consider it to be either always or almost always wrong for married people to have sexual relations with someone other than their spouses, and in response to a separate but related question, 89% say that "married men and women having an affair" is morally unacceptable. Unlike many sexual mores in American society, intolerance of infidelity has actually grown over the last two decades

Of course every cheater makes up some reason to justify it for themselves.

I would agree cheating is morally wrong and I have cheated. It's more a matter of degree

Matter of degree=Mental Gymnastics

FFS