Anonymous
Post 10/21/2020 20:39     Subject: Why Why WHY is the burden always on the mother?!
Anonymous wrote:The immigrant type "nanny" is really a housekeeper who makes sure the kids are still alive at the end of the day. Not the educated nanny.

I'm shocked at all these leftie moms on here who say "rah rah" for RBG but then take advantage of vulnerable women.


Wait.
The OP is an immigrant, and her nanny told her to take out the trash and unload the dishwasher before she left for the day. Her husband usually does it, but he was gone for the weekend.

Anyway, I stand firm that the OP is too nice. She is not taking advantage of others and is, in fact, being taken advantage of herself. She needs to hold some of the people in her life to a higher standard and not let them dump all over her.
Anonymous
Post 10/21/2020 20:20     Subject: Why Why WHY is the burden always on the mother?!
The immigrant type "nanny" is really a housekeeper who makes sure the kids are still alive at the end of the day. Not the educated nanny.

I'm shocked at all these leftie moms on here who say "rah rah" for RBG but then take advantage of vulnerable women.
Anonymous
Post 10/21/2020 13:10     Subject: Why Why WHY is the burden always on the mother?!
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I used to work as a nanny. For my first 2years after college while saving for grad school. I lived at home to save money.

I never did housekeeping for the family. I had a degree in psychology. I am there to raise the kids the mom didn't want to do herself.

I would have walked out if they asked me to do THEIR family chores. And they knew it.


+1. Former nanny here who has been paid very well. I was never expected to do anything beyond scope of taking care of the child and child related cleaning. I’m not a housekeeper or a house manager. I do not do the parents laundry, take out the trash, or clean their house. I have on many occasions did sweeping/vacuuming and emptied the dishwasher, but nothing beyond that. Too many parents want a nanny and housekeeper in one and then wonder why their nannies quit. Most nanny employers do not pay well enough or give enough respect for a nanny to be cleaning their underwear. Those responsibilities have nothing to do with a nanny.


Come on. Thus isn’t about washing dirty underwear.
The OP’s nanny told the OP to unload the dishwasher before she went to work. That’s not typical.
Anonymous
Post 10/21/2020 08:10     Subject: Why Why WHY is the burden always on the mother?!
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I used to work as a nanny. For my first 2years after college while saving for grad school. I lived at home to save money.

I never did housekeeping for the family. I had a degree in psychology. I am there to raise the kids the mom didn't want to do herself.

I would have walked out if they asked me to do THEIR family chores. And they knew it.


+1. Former nanny here who has been paid very well. I was never expected to do anything beyond scope of taking care of the child and child related cleaning. I’m not a housekeeper or a house manager. I do not do the parents laundry, take out the trash, or clean their house. I have on many occasions did sweeping/vacuuming and emptied the dishwasher, but nothing beyond that. Too many parents want a nanny and housekeeper in one and then wonder why their nannies quit. Most nanny employers do not pay well enough or give enough respect for a nanny to be cleaning their underwear. Those responsibilities have nothing to do with a nanny.


I know plenty of people whose nannies do housework or tasks separate from the care of the child. However, this is outlined in their employment contract and the pay is adjusted accordingly. You are right that these tasks are outside the scope of a nanny position, but also every employer can set the terms of the job as she sees fit. The key is to be up front about expectations from the very beginning - and be willing to pay.
Anonymous
Post 10/20/2020 23:49     Subject: Why Why WHY is the burden always on the mother?!
Anonymous wrote:I used to work as a nanny. For my first 2years after college while saving for grad school. I lived at home to save money.

I never did housekeeping for the family. I had a degree in psychology. I am there to raise the kids the mom didn't want to do herself.

I would have walked out if they asked me to do THEIR family chores. And they knew it.


+1. Former nanny here who has been paid very well. I was never expected to do anything beyond scope of taking care of the child and child related cleaning. I’m not a housekeeper or a house manager. I do not do the parents laundry, take out the trash, or clean their house. I have on many occasions did sweeping/vacuuming and emptied the dishwasher, but nothing beyond that. Too many parents want a nanny and housekeeper in one and then wonder why their nannies quit. Most nanny employers do not pay well enough or give enough respect for a nanny to be cleaning their underwear. Those responsibilities have nothing to do with a nanny.
Anonymous
Post 10/20/2020 21:41     Subject: Why Why WHY is the burden always on the mother?!
I used to work as a nanny. For my first 2years after college while saving for grad school. I lived at home to save money.

I never did housekeeping for the family. I had a degree in psychology. I am there to raise the kids the mom didn't want to do herself.

I would have walked out if they asked me to do THEIR family chores. And they knew it.