Spy on them/hire a spy

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you hear yourselves? Polygraphs? GPS on cars? Y’all must be crazy probably why he cheated. SMH

So you're protecting a narcissist who is selfish dishonest and a pathological liar?

The term "narcissist" gets way, way overused. I understand your desire to throw around a pejorative and you sound like you're channeling from your own personal experience, but just because someone cheats doesn't mean they're a "narcissist".

Narcissists are most likely to cheat and lie without remorse so yes most cheaters are actually narcissist. They need that constant attention but don't give as much as they take.

My husband of almost 20 years had an emotional affair a few years back. We were going through a time in our marriage where we were not available to each other, I was immersed in training for my career. We were both in therapy after, I also was before and during. The first year was the hardest, very much like ptsd, gut wrenching, soul crushing, truly the deepest pain i ever knew. Deep Betrayal. His witnessing this and his own deep shame and wish to save the marriage propelled him to therapy and he is not a therapy kind of guy. He did enough work, I did too, and now we are closer and better. I understand and love him more deeply, in all his flaws and human ness and he loves me more deeply as well. We are now truly ride or die, together to the end and we both know it in our bones. You can get through it. You can be stronger. It will take work, healing and time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you hear yourselves? Polygraphs? GPS on cars? Y’all must be crazy probably why he cheated. SMH

So you're protecting a narcissist who is selfish dishonest and a pathological liar?

The term "narcissist" gets way, way overused. I understand your desire to throw around a pejorative and you sound like you're channeling from your own personal experience, but just because someone cheats doesn't mean they're a "narcissist".

^ how far out are you? How long did it take you to get to this point? That’s quite a history? How are you able to trust?