Anonymous
Post 09/04/2020 11:09     Subject: Re:If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Well, for those of us working parents who do not have family and have young kids we do not really have a choice. our choices are quitting our jobs, lose our health insurance, and care for our kids. it is not an easy choice to make between the two.


Nevertheless, it is your responsibility, not your neighbors. This is why you have a child with a committed partner.


NP here, shut it.


The truth hurts, doesn't it?
Anonymous
Post 09/03/2020 17:29     Subject: Re:If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Well, for those of us working parents who do not have family and have young kids we do not really have a choice. our choices are quitting our jobs, lose our health insurance, and care for our kids. it is not an easy choice to make between the two.


Nevertheless, it is your responsibility, not your neighbors. This is why you have a child with a committed partner.


NP here, shut it.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2020 22:48     Subject: Re:If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Anonymous wrote:Well, for those of us working parents who do not have family and have young kids we do not really have a choice. our choices are quitting our jobs, lose our health insurance, and care for our kids. it is not an easy choice to make between the two.


Nevertheless, it is your responsibility, not your neighbors. This is why you have a child with a committed partner.
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2020 09:03     Subject: If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
NYS is Jan 1. And you can test ahead. My sister graduated by 20. In fact she has a masters degree and was a full time teacher at 21. In NY we had folks who graduated college at 19 if they were a Fall baby and skipped a grade
Anonymous
Post 08/30/2020 00:29     Subject: If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'm thinking that if I am speaking to a college student, then I am speaking to an adult who can drink, vote, buy a gun, serve in the military, drive, serve as a nurse, become a lifeguard, fly a plane, get a tattoo, go parachuting, hire an attorney, operate a forklift, buy marijuana, sign over power of attorney, become an organ donor, participate in an orgy, and take a knee during the National Anthem.

In other words, if I want to make a phone call to another adult, I will, and it has nothing to do with you.

Whether they accept my offer is between me and them.


Depends. College kids could be 17, and not legal to do much of that until their birthday in the fall (just graduated). Or they could be 18-20 and legal for most of your list. But frankly, if they live in OP’s home, OP has the right to set boundaries. If they choose to move out, then they get to make choices about exposure for themselves.


I don’t know any college kids who are 17 (few states have dec/Jan cutoffs), but okay.


https://nces.ed.gov/programs/statereform/tab5_3.asp
10 states have set cutoffs between 9/15 and 1/1, so a portion of hs graduates (not accelerated) are 17 when they start college. A number of other states allow for entry before a child’s fifth birthday.

This is why I laugh every tome someone says that a class is always the same age. Several states mandate that a child must start their education sometime between 4 and 6, and at least one says that they must start school by 7.
Anonymous
Post 08/29/2020 19:36     Subject: If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'm thinking that if I am speaking to a college student, then I am speaking to an adult who can drink, vote, buy a gun, serve in the military, drive, serve as a nurse, become a lifeguard, fly a plane, get a tattoo, go parachuting, hire an attorney, operate a forklift, buy marijuana, sign over power of attorney, become an organ donor, participate in an orgy, and take a knee during the National Anthem.

In other words, if I want to make a phone call to another adult, I will, and it has nothing to do with you.

Whether they accept my offer is between me and them.


Depends. College kids could be 17, and not legal to do much of that until their birthday in the fall (just graduated). Or they could be 18-20 and legal for most of your list. But frankly, if they live in OP’s home, OP has the right to set boundaries. If they choose to move out, then they get to make choices about exposure for themselves.


I don’t know any college kids who are 17 (few states have dec/Jan cutoffs), but okay.
Anonymous
Post 08/29/2020 19:36     Subject: Re:If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I love the privilege that lies beneath the logic - we will go to BLM events because those are essential but not work a menial job because that is a risk. My teen is babysitting this Summer because she won’t be able to buy books next semester if she doesn’t. She is not going to BLM events because she is working.


+1. I hate the phrase, but...you seriously need to check your privilege, OP. You're going to BLM events because it makes you feel self-righteous, just like it makes you feel self-righteous to chide others who are desperately trying to keep their jobs and take care of their much-loved children. Another PP who suggested your kids, if they really want to "do good" (and I'm not saying they're as oblivious as you, because they may well not be), would be better off offering free childcare to low-wage workers of color, was spot-on.


I agree with this. I am a 1% er with my own nanny who has finagled an in person spot for my kindergartener. I surely need to check my privilege too. But OP you are totally out of touch. You have no idea how desperate many parents of young children are to hang onto their jobs. They are willing to take the risk. You aren’t which is fine but they do know the score and honestly it isn’t good for them. Many of my colleagues, friends and reports are really struggling to be creative as the school system has left them utterly in the lurch. The ICU nurse I know can’t be home this fall with her second grader. It is hard. Really are your teens getting requests for sitters so the parents can go to the bars? Probably not all perfect but seriously this is a hard situation for many.
I also know people who desperately need elder care. Six months straight of caring for someone with progressing dementia is killing my mother for example (who I cannot help personally because she lives 1500 miles away). Please, I salute you for attending BLM protests but stop stomping on people trying to get by.
Anonymous
Post 08/29/2020 19:34     Subject: If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Anonymous wrote:Note to self when interviewing and hiring young people:

Ask, "What did you during the summer of 2020, the summer of Covid?"


I hope they say “I stayed home and social distanced.”
Anonymous
Post 08/29/2020 19:32     Subject: If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Reminds me of when wife was home when kids were younger and two working Moms started trying to dump kids as play dates for free childcare. I told wife tell them not an issue we can split your salary 50/50. After all only reason you can work is I am watching kid so 50/50. She did not do it but backed off.

I love moms earning 200 an hour throwing a kid 10 bucks an hour and keeping 190
Anonymous
Post 08/29/2020 19:31     Subject: If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Anonymous wrote:My daughters rarely rarely babysit. Folks who hire babysitters treat them like slaves in a plantations and are abusive.

The last time My daughter did it the newly divorced mom came home really late from her first date after her divorce and told my daughter she “got lucky” as reason for being late.



Huh?? Many folks around here pay their babysitters $15/hr, which is absurd to me considering that minimum wage in my hometown is half that amount and the kids there seem to be glad to work!
Anonymous
Post 08/29/2020 19:29     Subject: If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Anonymous wrote:Let me start by saying that I have the utmost sympathy for parents of young children who are trying to work at home this summer when daycare and camp opportunities are limited.

But . . . when you ask my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit do you not realize how risky that could be for your family and for ours? My daughters, who have been much in demand over the years as sitters and who truly love kids (as well as the money they've earned -- thank you), are besieged with requests to babysit this summer. They are turning all of these down because they just don't see it as reasonably safe -- and my husband and I agree completely.

Folks, you may not be aware of this, but like many families with young adults in residence, we are stretching our bubble for essential activities -- most notably BLM demonstrations -- but also other activities, which we deem to be an acceptable for our family, but which we cannot, in good conscience, expose you to. Yet, even when our daughters explain this to parents, they do not seem to get it.

And, conversely, we don't know how observant you and your adorable children are of social-distancing, mask-wearing and other public health guidelines. So, please don't ask us to take on your risk portfolio.

I know I'll probably get flamed for this, but please just think of it as a public service announcement brought to you by Karen. (And, no, that is not my real name.)




How privileged of you. You do realize that there are teens who have to significantly contribute to their college expenses, correct? Politely decline the offer if it’s not needed. Many people are unemployed right now and would love to babysit!
Anonymous
Post 08/29/2020 19:27     Subject: If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
My daughters rarely rarely babysit. Folks who hire babysitters treat them like slaves in a plantations and are abusive.

The last time My daughter did it the newly divorced mom came home really late from her first date after her divorce and told my daughter she “got lucky” as reason for being late.

Anonymous
Post 07/25/2020 20:45     Subject: Re:If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Well, for those of us working parents who do not have family and have young kids we do not really have a choice. our choices are quitting our jobs, lose our health insurance, and care for our kids. it is not an easy choice to make between the two.
Anonymous
Post 07/13/2020 16:58     Subject: If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Anonymous wrote:The simple “ask” shouldn’t be this offensive to you. Geez.


+1. What an obnoxious post. There's no harm in asking, and your kids can be grown ups and say no. Move on OP.
Anonymous
Post 07/12/2020 22:38     Subject: Re:If you're asking my high school and college-aged daughters to babysit, what are you thinking?
Just kindly respond No... Parents need to work and not everyone has the luxury to telecommute. Don't shame other people. These are tough times for everyone.