Anonymous wrote:I am feeling really grateful to be a SAHM right now. Especially since I am now involuntarily homeschooling the kids. DH is grateful too.

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Anonymous wrote:I’m a teacher so I don’t have to work but my soon to be 10 yo usually did some camp. I’m using our current time Tm together to figure out new ways to peacefully coexist at home. My DS is a tough kid in many ways but it’s going ok.

Let him go out. He is 10, he can ride a bike to all ends of the world(within 5 miles) and grow and explore his neighborhood. You know what is sad today? That most 10 year olds can't find their house if they go on a walk 4 streets down.

Oh I do. I actively encourage it. He is often very resistant to the idea. Any gentle ways to encourage more independence? I’m hoping library will reopen for summer. He has walked there with a friend before.

Yes, there are ways to encourage it. Cut off the access to TV and internet, pack him a "picnic" and if social distancing is allowing kids to play with friends, have two bikes? Can he ride a bike? Since I am aware that this in not the 80s, where my parents had no idea where I was and would only get worried by 7pm, and police might pick up your new free range kid.... I suggest a cheap cell phone(let face it, most kids already have them in the DMV by 8!) and download 360 on their phone. That way, you know where he is off to. Invite his friend over for a while day and clear with their parent if this kid is allowed to ride bikes and roam around without supervision. As you said you don't have to work during the summer, bike for you and him. Water, picnic, off to a huge long day away for you both. You will bond, you will have fun, you will let him and you get dirty. You will find sticks and streams. Then, have him do the same with a friend since he already explored that path with you. And don't worry about him, don't nag him, don't call him for lunch, he will live.
Now, this is all given he doesn't have some emotional or physical disability. Sorry if I sound like I am annoying, I don't know your kid, but these are some of the things I did, and now that my kids are older, I wish I gave them more freedom to do these activities. So, take my advice wit ha grain of salt! (We moved so much, my own kids rarely knew their neighborhoods, so maybe this is more something I could go back and change, than really what you can realistically do.)

He is ADHD/ASD, but I'm ok with implementing some of these strategies. Unfortunately, he experiences social rejection often, which makes things tougher. I'll also be in the third trimester of pregnancy by then, so I don't feel like biking, but I've been getting him out with me for walks in the morning (he rides his bike). He's a difficult and oppositional child who rejects many suggestions in a vehement way. However, I had enough of him needling his toddler sister this morning, so I threatened to throw him out of the house and he straightened up.

Ten, toddler and pregnant. Second marriage?

Secondary infertility....I’m just going to assume you weren’t trying to be snide.

Why would you have a third kid when you’re first is so difficult? Two I get for companionship, but do you really want to spread yourselves so thin with three? Some of you are such shit decision makers.

What a rude comment. I don't feel stretched thin with my two, even though one has significant challenges. I'll do just fine with a third.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There WILL be camps and pools and summer sports this summer. Don’t worry.

The coding camp mine was supposed to do just canceled. Girl Scout camp canceled. My daughter's music school sent out an email that they will offer virtual lessons for 25% off the normal fee but there will be no in-person lessons through at least June 30.

Two sports camps my sons always do during the summer canceled.

Our pool may open June 20 but that's not a given. If it does open, it will be first come first served limited capacity.

The gym where my DD teaches gymnastics each summer isn't having summer sessions, just privates. The local rec center where my son is a lifeguard is closed and will follow the VA Governor's order to remain that way until at least June 10 when they will reevaluate things.

I saw on FB that the karate place my one kid used to take lessons at has canceled their summer camp. That's a BIG one in my area because they are a popular summer choice for working parents. The kids don't just don't karate there. They also do arts & crafts, STEM projects, field trips, etc.

If I was a parent of elementary school-aged kids, I'd be freaking out right now to try to line up care and coverage for summertime!

Well mine are 11 and 8 and I'm not freaking out. If camps are cancelled, it's obviously not safe enough to go into the office. My company has no expectations for me to return until it is totally safe and when I'm comfortable. Our team has already decided we will likely not return to the office in 2021 since many of us take metro (it helps that most of us are virtual anyway, I WFH a few times a week before all this).

I think companies that are fighting this WFH thing will have to give leeway if parents don't have camps.

I don’t understand how childcare (or lack thereof) is your company’s responsibility.

Anonymous wrote:Bike, draw, read, watch TV, chores, water the lawn, mow the grass, more biking, drawing, reading, TV, and chores. They could try cooking. And there's this magical, popular thing called the Internets - which is endless!

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Anonymous wrote:I’m a teacher so I don’t have to work but my soon to be 10 yo usually did some camp. I’m using our current time Tm together to figure out new ways to peacefully coexist at home. My DS is a tough kid in many ways but it’s going ok.

Let him go out. He is 10, he can ride a bike to all ends of the world(within 5 miles) and grow and explore his neighborhood. You know what is sad today? That most 10 year olds can't find their house if they go on a walk 4 streets down.

Oh I do. I actively encourage it. He is often very resistant to the idea. Any gentle ways to encourage more independence? I’m hoping library will reopen for summer. He has walked there with a friend before.

Yes, there are ways to encourage it. Cut off the access to TV and internet, pack him a "picnic" and if social distancing is allowing kids to play with friends, have two bikes? Can he ride a bike? Since I am aware that this in not the 80s, where my parents had no idea where I was and would only get worried by 7pm, and police might pick up your new free range kid.... I suggest a cheap cell phone(let face it, most kids already have them in the DMV by 8!) and download 360 on their phone. That way, you know where he is off to. Invite his friend over for a while day and clear with their parent if this kid is allowed to ride bikes and roam around without supervision. As you said you don't have to work during the summer, bike for you and him. Water, picnic, off to a huge long day away for you both. You will bond, you will have fun, you will let him and you get dirty. You will find sticks and streams. Then, have him do the same with a friend since he already explored that path with you. And don't worry about him, don't nag him, don't call him for lunch, he will live.
Now, this is all given he doesn't have some emotional or physical disability. Sorry if I sound like I am annoying, I don't know your kid, but these are some of the things I did, and now that my kids are older, I wish I gave them more freedom to do these activities. So, take my advice wit ha grain of salt! (We moved so much, my own kids rarely knew their neighborhoods, so maybe this is more something I could go back and change, than really what you can realistically do.)

He is ADHD/ASD, but I'm ok with implementing some of these strategies. Unfortunately, he experiences social rejection often, which makes things tougher. I'll also be in the third trimester of pregnancy by then, so I don't feel like biking, but I've been getting him out with me for walks in the morning (he rides his bike). He's a difficult and oppositional child who rejects many suggestions in a vehement way. However, I had enough of him needling his toddler sister this morning, so I threatened to throw him out of the house and he straightened up.

Ten, toddler and pregnant. Second marriage?

Secondary infertility....I’m just going to assume you weren’t trying to be snide.

Why would you have a third kid when you’re first is so difficult? Two I get for companionship, but do you really want to spread yourselves so thin with three? Some of you are such shit decision makers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There WILL be camps and pools and summer sports this summer. Don’t worry.

The coding camp mine was supposed to do just canceled. Girl Scout camp canceled. My daughter's music school sent out an email that they will offer virtual lessons for 25% off the normal fee but there will be no in-person lessons through at least June 30.

Two sports camps my sons always do during the summer canceled.

Our pool may open June 20 but that's not a given. If it does open, it will be first come first served limited capacity.

The gym where my DD teaches gymnastics each summer isn't having summer sessions, just privates. The local rec center where my son is a lifeguard is closed and will follow the VA Governor's order to remain that way until at least June 10 when they will reevaluate things.

I saw on FB that the karate place my one kid used to take lessons at has canceled their summer camp. That's a BIG one in my area because they are a popular summer choice for working parents. The kids don't just don't karate there. They also do arts & crafts, STEM projects, field trips, etc.

If I was a parent of elementary school-aged kids, I'd be freaking out right now to try to line up care and coverage for summertime!

Well mine are 11 and 8 and I'm not freaking out. If camps are cancelled, it's obviously not safe enough to go into the office. My company has no expectations for me to return until it is totally safe and when I'm comfortable. Our team has already decided we will likely not return to the office in 2021 since many of us take metro (it helps that most of us are virtual anyway, I WFH a few times a week before all this).

I think companies that are fighting this WFH thing will have to give leeway if parents don't have camps.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There WILL be camps and pools and summer sports this summer. Don’t worry.

The coding camp mine was supposed to do just canceled. Girl Scout camp canceled. My daughter's music school sent out an email that they will offer virtual lessons for 25% off the normal fee but there will be no in-person lessons through at least June 30.

Two sports camps my sons always do during the summer canceled.

Our pool may open June 20 but that's not a given. If it does open, it will be first come first served limited capacity.

The gym where my DD teaches gymnastics each summer isn't having summer sessions, just privates. The local rec center where my son is a lifeguard is closed and will follow the VA Governor's order to remain that way until at least June 10 when they will reevaluate things.

I saw on FB that the karate place my one kid used to take lessons at has canceled their summer camp. That's a BIG one in my area because they are a popular summer choice for working parents. The kids don't just don't karate there. They also do arts & crafts, STEM projects, field trips, etc.

If I was a parent of elementary school-aged kids, I'd be freaking out right now to try to line up care and coverage for summertime!

Well mine are 11 and 8 and I'm not freaking out. If camps are cancelled, it's obviously not safe enough to go into the office. My company has no expectations for me to return until it is totally safe and when I'm comfortable. Our team has already decided we will likely not return to the office in 2021 since many of us take metro (it helps that most of us are virtual anyway, I WFH a few times a week before all this).

I think companies that are fighting this WFH thing will have to give leeway if parents don't have camps.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There WILL be camps and pools and summer sports this summer. Don’t worry.

The coding camp mine was supposed to do just canceled. Girl Scout camp canceled. My daughter's music school sent out an email that they will offer virtual lessons for 25% off the normal fee but there will be no in-person lessons through at least June 30.

Two sports camps my sons always do during the summer canceled.

Our pool may open June 20 but that's not a given. If it does open, it will be first come first served limited capacity.

The gym where my DD teaches gymnastics each summer isn't having summer sessions, just privates. The local rec center where my son is a lifeguard is closed and will follow the VA Governor's order to remain that way until at least June 10 when they will reevaluate things.

I saw on FB that the karate place my one kid used to take lessons at has canceled their summer camp. That's a BIG one in my area because they are a popular summer choice for working parents. The kids don't just don't karate there. They also do arts & crafts, STEM projects, field trips, etc.

If I was a parent of elementary school-aged kids, I'd be freaking out right now to try to line up care and coverage for summertime!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stay at home, watch TV, read, play in the yard, and play games like we did in the old days... especially if we were poor or middle class.

They will survive, and maybe become more creative.

But the difference was in the old days there was usually a parent home in the house or at least neighborhood kids and some neighbor parents home.
We made mistake of not signing up our rising 7th grader for camp. They complained they were too old and it was boring and to be honest the camps that were going to be best for that age group were either sleep away or very expensive day camps and we couldn't really afford those.
Here is what happened -

Day 1-3 - were ok, lots of calls and texts on first day especially as the day wound down, by day 3 the novelty had definitely worn off
Day 4 - onward lots of complaining before we left in the mornings, calls and texts and more and more days of accompanying us to work

what we discovered - most kids in our neighborhood were either at camp, on vacation or with relatives seriously limiting anyone close by to hang out with, also parents aren't keen to send their similar age child over to a house with no parents around for 10 hours a day and you as a parent don't want that either and we didn't want our kid roaming the neighborhood too far or alone for too long either

our pool changed their policies so kids under 15 couldn't enter the pool without an adult so no pool alone during the day and neighbors who had nannies or babysitters didn't want to burden them on a daily basis so that only panned out a couple of times but was costly for us because we ended up giving some cash to the caregiver to "cover expenses"

loneliness was a big problem, If we managed to work from home, then our kid could get absorbed in a project but when all alone they wouldn't do it

boredom and being stuck inside most of the day meant they wanted to go out and do things once we got home but we were often too tried

We finally bit the bullet and paid for a very expensive area day camp for 2 weeks that had a specific focus, and then begged a friend to let our kid be a nanny help for her nanny for her preschool twins, and then we ended up having to take vacation time for most of August. We were lucky our workplaces were flexible.

That summer was bad but it was a lesson learned for sure.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a teacher so I don’t have to work but my soon to be 10 yo usually did some camp. I’m using our current time Tm together to figure out new ways to peacefully coexist at home. My DS is a tough kid in many ways but it’s going ok.

Let him go out. He is 10, he can ride a bike to all ends of the world(within 5 miles) and grow and explore his neighborhood. You know what is sad today? That most 10 year olds can't find their house if they go on a walk 4 streets down.

Oh I do. I actively encourage it. He is often very resistant to the idea. Any gentle ways to encourage more independence? I’m hoping library will reopen for summer. He has walked there with a friend before.

Yes, there are ways to encourage it. Cut off the access to TV and internet, pack him a "picnic" and if social distancing is allowing kids to play with friends, have two bikes? Can he ride a bike? Since I am aware that this in not the 80s, where my parents had no idea where I was and would only get worried by 7pm, and police might pick up your new free range kid.... I suggest a cheap cell phone(let face it, most kids already have them in the DMV by 8!) and download 360 on their phone. That way, you know where he is off to. Invite his friend over for a while day and clear with their parent if this kid is allowed to ride bikes and roam around without supervision. As you said you don't have to work during the summer, bike for you and him. Water, picnic, off to a huge long day away for you both. You will bond, you will have fun, you will let him and you get dirty. You will find sticks and streams. Then, have him do the same with a friend since he already explored that path with you. And don't worry about him, don't nag him, don't call him for lunch, he will live.
Now, this is all given he doesn't have some emotional or physical disability. Sorry if I sound like I am annoying, I don't know your kid, but these are some of the things I did, and now that my kids are older, I wish I gave them more freedom to do these activities. So, take my advice wit ha grain of salt! (We moved so much, my own kids rarely knew their neighborhoods, so maybe this is more something I could go back and change, than really what you can realistically do.)

He is ADHD/ASD, but I'm ok with implementing some of these strategies. Unfortunately, he experiences social rejection often, which makes things tougher. I'll also be in the third trimester of pregnancy by then, so I don't feel like biking, but I've been getting him out with me for walks in the morning (he rides his bike). He's a difficult and oppositional child who rejects many suggestions in a vehement way. However, I had enough of him needling his toddler sister this morning, so I threatened to throw him out of the house and he straightened up.

Ten, toddler and pregnant. Second marriage?

Secondary infertility....I’m just going to assume you weren’t trying to be snide.

Why would you have a third kid when you’re first is so difficult? Two I get for companionship, but do you really want to spread yourselves so thin with three? Some of you are such shit decision makers.

Anonymous wrote:There WILL be camps and pools and summer sports this summer. Don’t worry.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stay at home, watch TV, read, play in the yard, and play games like we did in the old days... especially if we were poor or middle class.

They will survive, and maybe become more creative.

But the difference was in the old days there was usually a parent home in the house or at least neighborhood kids and some neighbor parents home.
We made mistake of not signing up our rising 7th grader for camp. They complained they were too old and it was boring and to be honest the camps that were going to be best for that age group were either sleep away or very expensive day camps and we couldn't really afford those.
Here is what happened -

Day 1-3 - were ok, lots of calls and texts on first day especially as the day wound down, by day 3 the novelty had definitely worn off
Day 4 - onward lots of complaining before we left in the mornings, calls and texts and more and more days of accompanying us to work

what we discovered - most kids in our neighborhood were either at camp, on vacation or with relatives seriously limiting anyone close by to hang out with, also parents aren't keen to send their similar age child over to a house with no parents around for 10 hours a day and you as a parent don't want that either and we didn't want our kid roaming the neighborhood too far or alone for too long either

our pool changed their policies so kids under 15 couldn't enter the pool without an adult so no pool alone during the day and neighbors who had nannies or babysitters didn't want to burden them on a daily basis so that only panned out a couple of times but was costly for us because we ended up giving some cash to the caregiver to "cover expenses"

loneliness was a big problem, If we managed to work from home, then our kid could get absorbed in a project but when all alone they wouldn't do it

boredom and being stuck inside most of the day meant they wanted to go out and do things once we got home but we were often too tried

We finally bit the bullet and paid for a very expensive area day camp for 2 weeks that had a specific focus, and then begged a friend to let our kid be a nanny help for her nanny for her preschool twins, and then we ended up having to take vacation time for most of August. We were lucky our workplaces were flexible.

That summer was bad but it was a lesson learned for sure.

Your kid is lonely and bored because you have spoon fed him/her entertainment his/her entire life up to this point.