Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 09:42     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Shabby rich. It’s a category. Also a WASP thing. The black and Hispanic kids in our kids schools are much better groomed and their clothes are immaculate, pressed and fit well. We are in between. I am a somewhat grungy dresser.


Because WASPs know they don't need to dress up to get ahead. My inlaws are the WASPy shabby type that are covered in horse hay and dog hair (from very expensive animals that they show) but everyone in town knows them for generations and their names and mannerisms indicate genteel Southerners. On the other hand, minorities need to dress better to be taken seriously.


Hispanic people who can are some of the most appearance obsessed people on earth. That is true and not a negative or positive comment. See Miami. I live in a major Hispanic populated area, and clothes, houses, grooming standards (and often fitness standards) are way high for MC and up.

It’s not an insecurity thing. Like wasps can get away with it. Beauty is just rooted in culture.



I'm from a heavily Persian part of Los Angeles. It may be the most appearance-obsessed part of the country.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 09:37     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Shabby rich. It’s a category. Also a WASP thing. The black and Hispanic kids in our kids schools are much better groomed and their clothes are immaculate, pressed and fit well. We are in between. I am a somewhat grungy dresser.


Because WASPs know they don't need to dress up to get ahead. My inlaws are the WASPy shabby type that are covered in horse hay and dog hair (from very expensive animals that they show) but everyone in town knows them for generations and their names and mannerisms indicate genteel Southerners. On the other hand, minorities need to dress better to be taken seriously.


Hispanic people who can are some of the most appearance obsessed people on earth. That is true and not a negative or positive comment. See Miami. I live in a major Hispanic populated area, and clothes, houses, grooming standards (and often fitness standards) are way high for MC and up.

It’s not an insecurity thing. Like wasps can get away with it. Beauty is just rooted in culture.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 09:12     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
Anonymous wrote:Shabby rich. It’s a category. Also a WASP thing. The black and Hispanic kids in our kids schools are much better groomed and their clothes are immaculate, pressed and fit well. We are in between. I am a somewhat grungy dresser.


Because WASPs know they don't need to dress up to get ahead. My inlaws are the WASPy shabby type that are covered in horse hay and dog hair (from very expensive animals that they show) but everyone in town knows them for generations and their names and mannerisms indicate genteel Southerners. On the other hand, minorities need to dress better to be taken seriously.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 09:07     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
I’m good on the clothes.

Braiding or styling always leads to dd getting mad, fighting with me, angry at me. Minor tugs to her feel like ripping her hair out.

But what should I do about dd’s hair? /s /s /s

She’ll grow out of this by age 10.

Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 09:04     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
Shabby rich. It’s a category. Also a WASP thing. The black and Hispanic kids in our kids schools are much better groomed and their clothes are immaculate, pressed and fit well. We are in between. I am a somewhat grungy dresser.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 09:00     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
Some of you are awful. Please don't call small kids "trashy." I remember there was one thread where some lady (one of the people who buys used HA and Boden) called kids in character clothing "trailer trash." That is pretty awful...if anything is trashy, it's that poster's behavior.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 08:54     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
OP--admit it. You just want to feel better than your sister. You are jealous that she "has plenty of money" and she has girls (I bet you are one of those gender-disappointed moms who cried when the ultrasound told you your second would be a boy).
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 08:51     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s not about money.

Try keeping a 2.5 year old in perfect expensive clothing when they are on the playground, in dirt, mud, painting, getting sweaty, eating. I’d rather them just be a kid and play them worry about keeping a shirt starched. And hair...everyday is a battle to brush or get it nice.

I buy target play clothes because it’s cheap, convenient, looks ok, and if it gets destroyed, grown out of, lost in a bottomless cubby it doesn’t matter.

Just let the kids play. When they are older want want to wear nicer stuff, we will get nicer stuff and they will need to be more careful.


Yeah, I don’t buy it. I have two very active kids who start out the day being clean, brushed and put together and encourage them to get as dirty and sweaty as they want. But they start the morning looking like someone loves them.

BTW, more expensive clothing like Hanna Andersen lasts longer and releases stains better than cheap clothes which saves money in the long run. And even filthy, they look better.


Hanna Andersen clothes really do not last longer than Target clothes. I bought their pjs a few times and they got holes after a couple washes.


They used to be better. I bought some old HA sleepers on eBay and they were really thick and well made. I think the quality has declined as they became more popular. The ones in the stores today are nothing like the old ones I found.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 08:37     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s not about money.

Try keeping a 2.5 year old in perfect expensive clothing when they are on the playground, in dirt, mud, painting, getting sweaty, eating. I’d rather them just be a kid and play them worry about keeping a shirt starched. And hair...everyday is a battle to brush or get it nice.

I buy target play clothes because it’s cheap, convenient, looks ok, and if it gets destroyed, grown out of, lost in a bottomless cubby it doesn’t matter.

Just let the kids play. When they are older want want to wear nicer stuff, we will get nicer stuff and they will need to be more careful.


Yeah, I don’t buy it. I have two very active kids who start out the day being clean, brushed and put together and encourage them to get as dirty and sweaty as they want. But they start the morning looking like someone loves them.

BTW, more expensive clothing like Hanna Andersen lasts longer and releases stains better than cheap clothes which saves money in the long run. And even filthy, they look better.


Hanna Andersen clothes really do not last longer than Target clothes. I bought their pjs a few times and they got holes after a couple washes.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 08:30     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
Anonymous wrote:This applies to people are wealthy/UMC, and who wanted children.

I don’t understand people who don’t care about their child’s appearance. Long, tangled hair, worn out and old clothing, etc.

I cared for my two nieces this week. My sister and her husband have plenty of money, yet all of the girls clothes were second hand, polyester, thread bare, faded. I’m fine with buying second hand (reuse reduce!) and not spending your money on a child’s wardrobe, but Target clothes aren’t expensive...?

I feel bad for the girls. What will they wear to school?

Their parents clothes are always tattered and poor quality, so clothing is definitely not something they care about.

I have two boys who rarely look put together, but their clothes are decent quality. Not, ripping at the seams.


In other words, if you had been lucky enough to get two girls or even one, you would have spent a fortune and lots of time making sure they were dressed to the nines.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 08:12     Subject: Re:Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The parents are too self-involved and “busy” to care what their kids look like.


Or maybe they care about things other then appearances!


I have 2 kids who had a lot of sensory issues as toddlers. Lots of screaming and tantrums as they got dressed, would only wear certain fabrics and went bonkers over seams and zippers etc. The worst part of having to dress my kids in their limitedv wardrobes of worn soft fabrics was you judgy bitches. I wanted to dress my daughter in beautiful outfits with braids or pigtails but her special needs prevented that. It hurts that you just think I am lazy and selfish.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 08:01     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My kid gets tons of hand-me-down clothes that are in decent condition, and every day she comes home from school with paint, markers, glitter glue, slime, what-have-you on them (she’s in preschool). Some of the stains come out easily, some don’t. And she is still growing fast so clothes don’t last, so I see no point in spending $ on new clothes - Target or Bowden - given the situation. One time she wore a nice dress to school and the slime they played with stained and nothing could get it out. $30 down the drain. No thanks. Plus it’s a fight anyway with her wanting to pick out what she wants. And don’t even get me started on her hair, which half the time I give up on combing out because she has ear-splitting screams like a banshee. It’s exhausting. She is regularly bathed, brushes her teeth, and clothes are regularly washed. At some point peer pressure will get her more focused on combed hair and put together clothes. For now, sorry if relatives or strangers don’t think she’s dressed “good enough.” Oh well.



You have school clothing and home clothing. If a shirt got stained at school, they wear that to school.


So I should dress up my kid when she’s hanging around the house? Why? FTR, I do hold back some nicer clothes for when we have events to go to and for those times she is dressed nicely, hair combed regardless of complaints.


You have school clothing that are fine to get paint, slime, marker on and other clothing for every day.


Paint slime and marker should be every day experiences for your child. If they are just school experiences then you are doing your kid far more harm than Harry Potter hair or Target shirts.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 07:55     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
Judge much? There's a name for people like you, it's snob.

Who cares what other people are wearing! As long as it's seasonally appropriate (then again, my DH and sons wear shorts year round, even when its 17 degrees). Kids play and get dirty. And I never sent my kids to school or out to play in their best clothing. It's going to get trashed anyway. As far as HA or whatever is the brand de jour, when they're young, they grow out of it so fast, why bother? Believe me, it'll be soon enough when they're teens and wanting certain brand names to fit in. There is absolutely no need to encourage such snobbery at a young age.

Get over yourself!
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 07:16     Subject: Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
I don't understand why you all are spending so much time looking at what other kids are wearing. I honestly couldn't tell you what color shirt my kids' friends were wearing yesterday, let alone what brand.
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2019 23:43     Subject: Re:Parents who don’t care about their child’s appearance
OP, you are much better than your sister! That was the point of making this post, right?