Anonymous wrote:Nothing about them per se. I think of my cousin who struggled with infertility for almost 10 years. Or another friend who has now lost 4, one being stillborn.

I hope a childless couple is childless by choice.

+1

My dear friend has been trying for a baby for 8 years. They’re very happily married, and in their mid thirties.

Nothing about them per se. I think of my cousin who struggled with infertility for almost 10 years. Or another friend who has now lost 4, one being stillborn.

I hope a childless couple is childless by choice.

Nothing

I think they are either infertile, like my dh and I or they know their talents lie elsewhere. Not everyone can afford to adopt, not everyone thinks they would be a good parent.

I think they must be bored of eating at "great!" restaurants to fill their time.

What do I think? Well, given how many screwed up kids there are I think people should be applauded for not having children.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly? I think wow, they are very different than me. I always knew I wanted to have kids and I cannot imagine not getting to have this amazing experience, much less not even wanting it. BUT: that thy are very different than me is just fine, the world is made up of all different kinds of people. If they're happy, I'm happy for them

TBH the people that baffle me the most are people who are into their 30s and still "aren't sure" whether they want them or not. That is much harder for me to comprehend

This. People who know they don't want kids shouldn't have kids. Good for them for determining their own path to happiness. I really wanted kids and I love mine very much, but it's still hard work. I can't imagine being a parent if you didn't really want it.

However, I also know single people in their 30's and even 40's who are still "debating" whether they want to have kids. They party hard and have very dysfunctional relationships and can't commit - lots of self destructive behaviors. I judge them for whining that they want marriage and maybe kids one day while behaving in the opposite way. I don't judge them for not having kids though, as I don't think they should. I would respect them more if they just figured out what they want and went for it without whining.

+2 to all of this

+4. I honestly do not understand the people who are in their mid 30s and still "undecided."

Just a guess, but I imagine they probably don’t want them, but feel a lot of societal and familial pressure to have them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly? I think wow, they are very different than me. I always knew I wanted to have kids and I cannot imagine not getting to have this amazing experience, much less not even wanting it. BUT: that thy are very different than me is just fine, the world is made up of all different kinds of people. If they're happy, I'm happy for them

TBH the people that baffle me the most are people who are into their 30s and still "aren't sure" whether they want them or not. That is much harder for me to comprehend

This. People who know they don't want kids shouldn't have kids. Good for them for determining their own path to happiness. I really wanted kids and I love mine very much, but it's still hard work. I can't imagine being a parent if you didn't really want it.

However, I also know single people in their 30's and even 40's who are still "debating" whether they want to have kids. They party hard and have very dysfunctional relationships and can't commit - lots of self destructive behaviors. I judge them for whining that they want marriage and maybe kids one day while behaving in the opposite way. I don't judge them for not having kids though, as I don't think they should. I would respect them more if they just figured out what they want and went for it without whining.

+2 to all of this

+4. I honestly do not understand the people who are in their mid 30s and still "undecided."

Anonymous wrote:I feel jealous, because I know what I’m missing!

Then I feel bad for them, because I know what they’re missing.

Pros and cons.

Yes!! Exactly this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly? I think wow, they are very different than me. I always knew I wanted to have kids and I cannot imagine not getting to have this amazing experience, much less not even wanting it. BUT: that thy are very different than me is just fine, the world is made up of all different kinds of people. If they're happy, I'm happy for them

TBH the people that baffle me the most are people who are into their 30s and still "aren't sure" whether they want them or not. That is much harder for me to comprehend

This. People who know they don't want kids shouldn't have kids. Good for them for determining their own path to happiness. I really wanted kids and I love mine very much, but it's still hard work. I can't imagine being a parent if you didn't really want it.

However, I also know single people in their 30's and even 40's who are still "debating" whether they want to have kids. They party hard and have very dysfunctional relationships and can't commit - lots of self destructive behaviors. I judge them for whining that they want marriage and maybe kids one day while behaving in the opposite way. I don't judge them for not having kids though, as I don't think they should. I would respect them more if they just figured out what they want and went for it without whining.

+2 to all of this

+3. Have a lot of friends who fall into this category. Sadly, also have friends who do want kids and haven't managed to have them.

I can respect most people's choices. However, if you don't have kids, don't tell me all about how to raise mine based on your experience with your niece/nephew/neighbor etc. I have one friend, whom I love, but she has this annoying habit. Always telling me how her nieces are so perfect because her sister really knows how to raise them right. When the girls were 15 months she bragged about how they were amazing eaters because of how their parents never fed them baby food. I smiled and said "well, let's see what happens when they're 2" (I had a 2 and 4 year old at the time). She got really angry with me! Fast forward a couple years and she is baffled that the amazing eaters are now picky.

Anonymous wrote:Not something I think about.

Then why did you respond????

Another example:

Question: How do those of you with silver shoes tie your laces?

Dumb Poster Answer: I don't have silver shoes.

The question is not for you!!!

Not something I think about.

Anonymous wrote:I'm jealous. I think they are smarter than I. Having kids is tough.

+1

Anonymous wrote:I feel jealous, because I know what I’m missing!

Then I feel bad for them, because I know what they’re missing.

Pros and cons.

Exactly. Just the same way that there are both pros and cons to having multiple siblings vs. an only, there are good & bad aspects of most decisions in life.

I feel jealous, because I know what I’m missing!

Then I feel bad for them, because I know what they’re missing.

Pros and cons.