Anonymous
Post 03/19/2021 10:27     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Are you new here? They're all 45 year old first time moms.


Seriously, DC is like the GrannyMom capital of the world. And no, the alternative is not having kids at 20. Many, many people have kids in their early 30s before the grannies start going crazy about establishing their financial independence pre-kids.


I was in grad school in my early 30s, then working, traveling, having fun, making $$$. It's wonderful to have kids later in life. I was able to switch to a good paying job with great work - life balance because of the education and experience that I got pre-kids. Honestly, I feel bad for those moms who had kids early on, work in dead end jobs with no flexibility, never got established, cannot afford a nice spa day, gym, derm appointments, vacations, and have to shop at Sams.


shots fired
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2021 23:17     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
It’s much harder to have a live baby at 44 than it is at 38.
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2021 23:14     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
Anonymous wrote:I had my first at 36, almost 37 (surprise pregnancy), and now I'm expecting my second, who will be born when I'm 39 (conceived him on our third cycle trying; I had a chemical pregnancy the cycle before). Uncomplicated pregnancies, so far. The first was harder (much worse symptoms) than the second has been.

I know I'm fortunate to have conceived two healthy babies quickly, but I am far from alone.


When I saw this old thread I wondered if I had posted in it, and here I am.

I'm 43 now, and that baby is 4. Normal pregnancy, big healthy baby. But I am very glad I finished having children when I did because my cycles have been a little weird ever since he was born, and now I have an autoimmune disease that can limit fertility anyway.
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2021 16:36     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
Anonymous wrote:Just do the math that in 20 years you will be putting a kid through college when you may want to retire.


That's what savings and 529s are for, no? For many of us (not all of course), one of the consequences of delaying childbearing is increased financial stability and established careers which allow us to save.
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2021 16:34     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
Anonymous wrote:Anyone on the board have babies between ages of 38-44 or so? I think I might want another baby someday and need some words of encouragement.


Please, please use the search function before starting another one of these interminable threads. There are HUNDREDS of pages on this topic.
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2021 16:33     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
Anonymous wrote:Just do the math that in 20 years you will be putting a kid through college when you may want to retire.


I'm not retiring until they refuse to pay me anymore - non-supervisory GS15 at financial agency, WFH most of the time even pre-covid.
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2021 16:32     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
I had my first at 29 and really wanted a second by 35. That just wasn't in the card due to unrelated reasons. Now I am 36 and think I could be ready to try later this year, but being 37 when delivering is older than I ever planned for. Not sure about it
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2021 16:29     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
The OP's question is a little odd to me as there's a huge difference between 38 and 44 in terms of your chances of getting pregnant and having a child. Lots of people are having kids at 38 without difficulty, less so at 44.
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2021 16:24     Subject: Re:Late 30's/40's pregnancies
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:married at 38, first baby at 39, second at 41. No fertility issues, but #2 was small for gestational age--a tiny baby at birth, but seems to have caught up. No known cause of small size, but perhaps due to environment in womb. Is now a happy, healthy, slightly chubby four year old.

Downsides: we wont be retiring early, i worry about dying before my kids are grown up, worry about being an old grandma who can't help out.


My 75 y/o mom had us in her 40s and she helped a lot with my first. She's super healthy, active, and full of energy. My MIL is 15 years older, overweight, and barely keeping up with the grandkids.


15 years older? That would mean she is 90, you can't expect a 90 year old to be keeping up with anyone.
Anonymous
Post 03/18/2021 16:02     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
Anonymous wrote:Just do the math that in 20 years you will be putting a kid through college when you may want to retire.


yeah, well, i retired once at 25 and hated it. i plan to be working in my 60s regardless of how much money i have, so might as well have a kid now that my life can more easily accommodate it.
Anonymous
Post 03/17/2021 15:30     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
Just do the math that in 20 years you will be putting a kid through college when you may want to retire.
Anonymous
Post 03/17/2021 15:12     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
Kids at 36 and 38, easy pregnancies, easy deliveries, easy recovery. Tossing around the idea of a 3rd now that I'm 40. My mom didn't hit menopause til she was 55.
Anonymous
Post 03/17/2021 14:59     Subject: Re:Late 30's/40's pregnancies
I had my second (unplanned) at 41. My mom had me at 41 and my brother at 43 with no treatments.
Anonymous
Post 03/17/2021 14:20     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
First at 31. Second at 35. Due in two months with third at 41. Pregnancy has been a breeze all three times, but I’m in great shape and workout daily. Waiting to see how hard that sleep deprivation hits this time though. Did IVF for all three with eggs from when I was 30.
Anonymous
Post 03/17/2021 12:31     Subject: Late 30's/40's pregnancies
We mothers will never get ahead if we keep judging each other! Having kids is part choice and part chance. I did IVF at 33 but was in a PACE group with women who were FTMs at 38-40 without IVF and our parenting experiences were more similar than they were different.