Anonymous wrote:Ok, have we diagnosed the issue in this area as selfish people who insist on having it all as our biggest reason why folks aren't having kids?

Anonymous wrote:Why are you here, PP? Just curious.

Anonymous wrote:Why are you here, PP? Just curious.

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Anonymous wrote:Why the fuck did you people buy a home with a mortgage near $4500/month?

That's your first problem.

Because we can.

Yeah, but you didn't HAVE to. Then you bitch about cost of living.

I haven't bitched about the cost of living at all. I've said that children are expensive and would consume a lot of our extra income. I prefer a certain lifestyle over children. I'm not willing to live a bare bones existence in order to have them. The same goes for many of our friends. This is all in response to the question originally posed asking why people aren't having kids.

Ok, fine. But don't BLAME cost of living for why you aren't having kids when you know that your lifestyle is large and you just aren't willing to give it up.

If you don't want kids, don't have kids. I really would rather someone who is selfish this way doesn't.

But, again, spare me. Most people don't have mortgages that large unless they have bought too much house. Most people here start small in a condo or a TH. That's not really bare bones living-it's budgeting and living within their means.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why the fuck did you people buy a home with a mortgage near $4500/month?

That's your first problem.

Because we can.

Yeah, but you didn't HAVE to. Then you bitch about cost of living.

I haven't bitched about the cost of living at all. I've said that children are expensive and would consume a lot of our extra income. I prefer a certain lifestyle over children. I'm not willing to live a bare bones existence in order to have them. The same goes for many of our friends. This is all in response to the question originally posed asking why people aren't having kids.

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Anonymous wrote:Again, the posters above with large HHI are are not too poor. Their priorities are not aligned with kids. Whatever. Do what you want. But stop with the "we can't afford it" crap - it just isn't true.

Daycare plus very basic child needs (diapers, formula) runs at least 25k a year. Do you really think most 30 year olds have an extra 25k laying around?

There are plenty of 30-year-olds in the DC area who have children. I haven't asked them all whether or not they have an extra $25,000 lying around, but the possibilities are 1. yes, they do, or 2. no, they don't, but are somehow managing anyway.

Now, you might not want to manage the way they're managing. And that would be perfectly ok!

But it is absurd to say, "I can't afford to have a child", when there are a lot of people who earn a lot less than you and have a child.

I am 30 and know maybe 3 people who had a child at age 30 in this area. One had incredible financial support from family (bought them a house) and the other had to move from the city to the burbs into a family-owned condo. The third couple got pregnant on accident and the child had severe needs. They had to move way out into MD and the wife had to quit her job. They are barely getting by.

People means people. Not people in the DCUM demographic. People. All people.

We are talking about people in this area. It is expensive. Who cares what people in BFE do?

NP. This sums up your attitude perfectly. No, you're not going to be able to have kids AND live in Logan Circle, shop at Intermix, brunch at Le Diplomate every Sunday and head up to NYC one weekend a month

I wonder why you are so bothered that some people don't want children?

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Again, the posters above with large HHI are are not too poor. Their priorities are not aligned with kids. Whatever. Do what you want. But stop with the "we can't afford it" crap - it just isn't true.

Daycare plus very basic child needs (diapers, formula) runs at least 25k a year. Do you really think most 30 year olds have an extra 25k laying around?

There are plenty of 30-year-olds in the DC area who have children. I haven't asked them all whether or not they have an extra $25,000 lying around, but the possibilities are 1. yes, they do, or 2. no, they don't, but are somehow managing anyway.

Now, you might not want to manage the way they're managing. And that would be perfectly ok!

But it is absurd to say, "I can't afford to have a child", when there are a lot of people who earn a lot less than you and have a child.

I am 30 and know maybe 3 people who had a child at age 30 in this area. One had incredible financial support from family (bought them a house) and the other had to move from the city to the burbs into a family-owned condo. The third couple got pregnant on accident and the child had severe needs. They had to move way out into MD and the wife had to quit her job. They are barely getting by.

Sadly this has been my experience too. Or they're living in a studio and the wife doesn't work. They were married, but baby was an oops baby.

Public preschool would be a boon.

And I know plenty of couples at 30-something who have houses in Arlington or Tysons or Burke who work, have happy babies at daycare or with family, are doing fine. Are those places BFE?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why the fuck did you people buy a home with a mortgage near $4500/month?

That's your first problem.

Because we can.

Yeah, but you didn't HAVE to. Then you bitch about cost of living.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, the posters above with large HHI are are not too poor. Their priorities are not aligned with kids. Whatever. Do what you want. But stop with the "we can't afford it" crap - it just isn't true.

Daycare plus very basic child needs (diapers, formula) runs at least 25k a year. Do you really think most 30 year olds have an extra 25k laying around?

There are plenty of 30-year-olds in the DC area who have children. I haven't asked them all whether or not they have an extra $25,000 lying around, but the possibilities are 1. yes, they do, or 2. no, they don't, but are somehow managing anyway.

Now, you might not want to manage the way they're managing. And that would be perfectly ok!

But it is absurd to say, "I can't afford to have a child", when there are a lot of people who earn a lot less than you and have a child.

I am 30 and know maybe 3 people who had a child at age 30 in this area. One had incredible financial support from family (bought them a house) and the other had to move from the city to the burbs into a family-owned condo. The third couple got pregnant on accident and the child had severe needs. They had to move way out into MD and the wife had to quit her job. They are barely getting by.

Sadly this has been my experience too. Or they're living in a studio and the wife doesn't work. They were married, but baby was an oops baby.

Public preschool would be a boon.

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, the posters above with large HHI are are not too poor. Their priorities are not aligned with kids. Whatever. Do what you want. But stop with the "we can't afford it" crap - it just isn't true.

Daycare plus very basic child needs (diapers, formula) runs at least 25k a year. Do you really think most 30 year olds have an extra 25k laying around?

There are plenty of 30-year-olds in the DC area who have children. I haven't asked them all whether or not they have an extra $25,000 lying around, but the possibilities are 1. yes, they do, or 2. no, they don't, but are somehow managing anyway.

Now, you might not want to manage the way they're managing. And that would be perfectly ok!

But it is absurd to say, "I can't afford to have a child", when there are a lot of people who earn a lot less than you and have a child.

I am 30 and know maybe 3 people who had a child at age 30 in this area. One had incredible financial support from family (bought them a house) and the other had to move from the city to the burbs into a family-owned condo. The third couple got pregnant on accident and the child had severe needs. They had to move way out into MD and the wife had to quit her job. They are barely getting by.

People means people. Not people in the DCUM demographic. People. All people.

We are talking about people in this area. It is expensive. Who cares what people in BFE do?

NP. This sums up your attitude perfectly. No, you're not going to be able to have kids AND live in Logan Circle, shop at Intermix, brunch at Le Diplomate every Sunday and head up to NYC one weekend a month

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why the fuck did you people buy a home with a mortgage near $4500/month?

That's your first problem.

Because we can.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, the posters above with large HHI are are not too poor. Their priorities are not aligned with kids. Whatever. Do what you want. But stop with the "we can't afford it" crap - it just isn't true.

Daycare plus very basic child needs (diapers, formula) runs at least 25k a year. Do you really think most 30 year olds have an extra 25k laying around?

There are plenty of 30-year-olds in the DC area who have children. I haven't asked them all whether or not they have an extra $25,000 lying around, but the possibilities are 1. yes, they do, or 2. no, they don't, but are somehow managing anyway.

Now, you might not want to manage the way they're managing. And that would be perfectly ok!

But it is absurd to say, "I can't afford to have a child", when there are a lot of people who earn a lot less than you and have a child.

I am 30 and know maybe 3 people who had a child at age 30 in this area. One had incredible financial support from family (bought them a house) and the other had to move from the city to the burbs into a family-owned condo. The third couple got pregnant on accident and the child had severe needs. They had to move way out into MD and the wife had to quit her job. They are barely getting by.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you consider bfe? Anything outside city lines?

Yes, people move to cheaper burbs, they cut some savings priorities to afford daycare, they use cheaper daycare forms, they flex hours, etc. etc.

We had our first when we made $90k combined. We were able to pay a mortgage on a small TH in the burbs, save and send our child to an in home daycare.

This was less than 10 years ago, btw. So, spare me.

That lifestyle sounds terrible. Not everyone had the biological urge to have a child at all costs.