Anonymous
Post 05/13/2015 14:00     Subject: Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
This is an interesting discussion, but it's not unique to SWS is it? The old SAHPs vs. the WOHPs dynamic. The thing that I've always found unique about SWS is that I don't think many people actually feel like the "marginalized" PP does.

I'm not sure I'd qualify as a SAH parent at SWS, since I have a very flexible work schedule, and I think most of the "SAHP"s that we're speaking of are not strictly SAH, (do you envision they're simply cleaning and baking cookies when they aren't at the school?) Most of the parents I know at the school work in some form or fashion: as freelance writers, web developers, teachers, rental property managers, supporting their spouses in small businesses, etc. In fact, I'm hard-pressed to think of a single parent that I'm close to that doesn't bring in income for their families in one form or fashion.

However, because of our flexible schedules, I and many other parents, do seem to be the same crowd on many field trips and may seem tighter or "popular" if you will (but how ridiculous a term and one that would never have crossed my mind to use when speaking of adult relationships) and I just feel like this is all a matter of perspective rather than an actual "us/them" dynamic that's occurring. In fact, I'm pretty sure the elected LSAT member are, and have always been, some of the busiest people at the school.

As someone who can give more of my time and energy to the school than some other parents, I just want to say that I don't begrudge anyone for not being able to do the same. It's hard, parenting in this city, we're all busy, busy, busy, but SWS does a great job of making their school and this community feel like a priority. I think it should be a priority. Perhaps that's Reggio, and people should know that on the front end, but it's never been hidden, and if you can't be there and you don't feel dialed in, it isn't "cliquishness" that's making you feel that way. It's probably just life in 2015.

I promise if you reach out to me for a play-date, or a chat to commiserate in the million different ways we're screwing this whole parenting thing up, or you need some extra help with something because you're slammed at work, I'm happy to help and I'm happy for the opportunity to support you. Always have been.
Anonymous
Post 05/13/2015 12:36     Subject: Re:Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:As a SWS parent who works outside the home I have to admit that I rely a lot on the stay at home parents - to tell me what is going on in the classroom and at the school more broadly, to send me pictures of field trips, to generally help me feel connected. There have certainly been times when I've felt a pang of something (guilt, jealousy, I don't know) that I can't volunteer on the same level. But talking to other friends who work, they have the same pangs occasionally.


Another SWS WOHM, and I agree with this. The super-involved SAH parents (not just moms, but mostly) do all seem to know each other better and hang out together. But they are perfectly friendly if you sidle up next to them on the playground or at meetings or whatever. To the SWS PP who feels left out: I strongly encourage reaching out, if befriending other parents is important to you. Go to the auction, to some of the game nights or whatever, hang out after pickup on the playground. Chat with the parents who you think of as "cliqueish." Or, even better, with the other parents you see who also don't seem to know everyone!

SWS does seem to have an extraordinarily high ratio of SAH or very part-time-employed parents. I just looked at my daughter's class list and, yes, 11 out of the 22 kids in her class have a SAH parent. (It's lower for my older kid's class.) That certainly affects the feeling of the school and probably makes working moms feel less comfortable. But our kids' school is made a better place by all the hours volunteered by those SAH parents so I try to remind myself to feel grateful rather than jealous or left out.


I think this PP has it exactly right. SWS has been like this for a long time. I was an SWS WOHM when it was still housed in the Cluster and only PK4 and PK5. I had the same pangs, and shook my head a bit at the surprisingly high percentage of SAH parents. But just as the PP mentioned, I made the effort to reach into that SAHM clique, whose service to the school I also appreciated. Lo and behold, years later, with kids scattered to many schools my closest mommy friends are my SWS compatriots, SAH and WOH, as well as a couple of the SWS teachers.
Anonymous
Post 05/13/2015 09:36     Subject: Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
Anonymous wrote:This is new this year correct? Because I know it hasn't worked that way in the past. When we got into a higher ranked school we got calls of Waitlists by schools ranked lower well into the summer. You get the boot off the WL if it's your initial lottery match, but once the WLs left central I though they were all worked individually by the various schools? Happy to hear if that's the way it's being managed now, much more equitable.


Yes this is new. What isn't clear to me at least is how long the My School DC office will keep waitlist management going. From their website/FAQs it seems clear the central mgmt will continue until school starts (and perhaps count day) but not sure what happens into the winter.
Anonymous
Post 05/13/2015 09:32     Subject: Re:Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
Anonymous wrote:As a SWS parent who works outside the home I have to admit that I rely a lot on the stay at home parents - to tell me what is going on in the classroom and at the school more broadly, to send me pictures of field trips, to generally help me feel connected. There have certainly been times when I've felt a pang of something (guilt, jealousy, I don't know) that I can't volunteer on the same level. But talking to other friends who work, they have the same pangs occasionally.


Another SWS WOHM, and I agree with this. The super-involved SAH parents (not just moms, but mostly) do all seem to know each other better and hang out together. But they are perfectly friendly if you sidle up next to them on the playground or at meetings or whatever. To the SWS PP who feels left out: I strongly encourage reaching out, if befriending other parents is important to you. Go to the auction, to some of the game nights or whatever, hang out after pickup on the playground. Chat with the parents who you think of as "cliqueish." Or, even better, with the other parents you see who also don't seem to know everyone!

SWS does seem to have an extraordinarily high ratio of SAH or very part-time-employed parents. I just looked at my daughter's class list and, yes, 11 out of the 22 kids in her class have a SAH parent. (It's lower for my older kid's class.) That certainly affects the feeling of the school and probably makes working moms feel less comfortable. But our kids' school is made a better place by all the hours volunteered by those SAH parents so I try to remind myself to feel grateful rather than jealous or left out.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2015 21:51     Subject: Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
Anonymous wrote:On the cliques: But the principal is somewhat unusual in that he delegates practically all decisions to his staff or, more likely, the LSAT (an elected group of popular parents). So if you have an issue with something happening in your child's classroom, you can email the principal about it but he probably will delegate it to the LSAT.

I haven't found this to be true about the principal (that he delegates classroom concerns to the LSAT), but SWS began as a teacher led program. Teachers still have far more input on the direction of the school then at least the other 3 schools I've been with different kids.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2015 21:39     Subject: Re:Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
As a SWS parent who works outside the home I have to admit that I rely a lot on the stay at home parents - to tell me what is going on in the classroom and at the school more broadly, to send me pictures of field trips, to generally help me feel connected. There have certainly been times when I've felt a pang of something (guilt, jealousy, I don't know) that I can't volunteer on the same level. But talking to other friends who work, they have the same pangs occasionally.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2015 18:41     Subject: Re:Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
Well...several posters were begging for details. I'm impressed it took this long for stories to emerge.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2015 18:37     Subject: Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
Classy pp. SWS has been able to stay away from this type of mud-slinging here and you should be proud you broke the seal. I'll call on my fellow SWS parents to not even justify this with a retort. Except - if PP thinks 50% of the moms are SAH she's obviosuly had a lot of talks with all of them as this is no where near a realistic number.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2015 17:02     Subject: Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
On the cliques: We are at SWS and I feel like I am back in middle or high school with the cliques. Normally, I would not worry too much about the parental stuff, because I have a full-time job, other friends outside SWS, and really it is all about the kids and what they are learning. But the principal is somewhat unusual in that he delegates practically all decisions to his staff or, more likely, the LSAT (an elected group of popular parents). So if you have an issue with something happening in your child's classroom, you can email the principal about it but he probably will delegate it to the LSAT. If you are not in the popular crowd, instead of having your issue addressed, you will be placated and marginalized by the LSAT, and made to feel it was inappropriate for you to "rock the boat." It is a rather uncomfortable feeling.

Also, especially with the younger kids, the parental cliques do trickle down to the kids because only certain kids get invited to playdates, etc.

SWS has a high percentage of stay-at-home moms (I have heard 50%), which I think contributes to this phenomenon. They have more time to dedicate to the school, make friends with the principal and each other, and feel entitled to call the shots because they "give so much" to the school.

All that said, we will stay so long as SWS remains our best option, all things balanced. The good thing is that, with a couple exceptions, the staff are overall excellent so normally there are not too many issues.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2015 16:20     Subject: Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
This is new this year correct? Because I know it hasn't worked that way in the past. When we got into a higher ranked school we got calls of Waitlists by schools ranked lower well into the summer. You get the boot off the WL if it's your initial lottery match, but once the WLs left central I though they were all worked individually by the various schools? Happy to hear if that's the way it's being managed now, much more equitable.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2015 15:08     Subject: Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
Anonymous wrote:That's how it SHOULD work, but don't the individual schools manage the wait lists still? So, how would SWS know the #4 WL student enrolled at a school his parents ranked off of higher if he got off another wait list? IS there central management of some sort?


It is centrally managed and the principals don't really have that kind of control. The schools may make the call to waitlisted families but they don't have any control over managing the list.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2015 14:54     Subject: Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
That's how it SHOULD work, but don't the individual schools manage the wait lists still? So, how would SWS know the #4 WL student enrolled at a school his parents ranked off of higher if he got off another wait list? IS there central management of some sort?
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2015 14:09     Subject: Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Our WL numbers moved from 110 to 108 for PK3. This may mean that two spots were offered off of the list...good luck for those with good numbers!


no -- it just means that two people ahead of you enrolled somewhere (not necessarily SWS) and are no longer on the list


Hence the "may mean"


Our waitlist number is in the 40s and has only improved by 1. So odds are good that at least one of those two spots PP moved was just someone who enrolled elsewhere.


Forgive my ignorance - I thought you remain on waitlists even if you enroll elsewhere. Is this not the case?


not if you gain a space at a school ranked higher. Some on this board may find this hard to believe, but even as a devoted SWS parent I recognize that others do prioritize other schools besides SWS
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2015 13:53     Subject: Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Our WL numbers moved from 110 to 108 for PK3. This may mean that two spots were offered off of the list...good luck for those with good numbers!


no -- it just means that two people ahead of you enrolled somewhere (not necessarily SWS) and are no longer on the list


Hence the "may mean"


Our waitlist number is in the 40s and has only improved by 1. So odds are good that at least one of those two spots PP moved was just someone who enrolled elsewhere.


Forgive my ignorance - I thought you remain on waitlists even if you enroll elsewhere. Is this not the case?
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2015 12:22     Subject: Re:Is the SWS waitlist moving for Pk3?
Anonymous wrote:Anyone know if the wait list has moved, or expected to move for 1st? Our number hasn't changed but I know its not always current.


I think you'll know by June - each year there are at least a couple of families who move, try something else. If you're at the top odds are good you'll get in.