Sad story, and sad thread. I went to a competitive college and was very unhappy. Never as sad as Madison, but I did transfer and was only slightly happier as I transferred to a more competitive school.

I'm trying to learn from my own experience and NOT pressure my kids to go to a competitive school. I want them to go to a school which offers academics and sports and activities they are interested in, no matter the prestige of the school. I tell them the best school is the best school for them.

OTOH, college is extremely expensive, and I'm going to be looking for merit aid, so I've been pressuring my kids to get the best grades they possibly can and to do well in their respective sports (which they love, so that part isn't difficult for them).

I don't know what will break a child. It's so difficult to send them off to college not knowing how they will react. I don't want them at the same type of schools I went to. I want them to be "above average" and shine, be the big fish in a small pond, if it comes to that, or at least be right in the middle of the pack. I felt like a winner in high school, and a loser in college, not that I was a loser, but the field become so competitive in college. I don't want my kids to feel that way.

Maybe this will help. I don't know. I pray a lot too.

Way to ruin the topic.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:College delays growing up. The party hard way of life is turning too many people into self indulging Peter Pans. When students are having real emotional problems at college they look around at their peers who are stressed out studying or are too drunk and high to walk. College has become a warped world and sets the stage for future self destruction.

By your writing, you sound young and, sadly, cynical. Are you basing your observations on what you see going on with your peers now? Don't base these observations and conclusions on college life solely on the antics of peers who have lost their way with drugs and alcohol. Hopefully, they will have someone who they can reach out to and give them a place to land (as another poster so eloquently stated). Drugs and alcohol do make people self-absorbed (or self-indulgent as you say). Sometimes it's their way of escaping emotional problems and most likely now an addiction.

But that is a path you certainly don't have to take. Right now, it seems like you're angry, disillusioned, and cynical. If you don't have family to talk with then seek out college counseling. Every college campus has someone you can talk with about your perceptions. And don't forget good friends. I promise you those ideas you have can be changed or approached from a different perspective.

Give yourself a chance and best of luck to you. College can be a wonderful place for growth, friendships, and opportunities.

What a classy response. Now, that I re-read, PP does sound young. Thank you for providing another viewpoint. There is more than one way to address a thread where others might benefit.

PP here. I also previously commented how I wondered what it would be like to turn back the hands of time and approach my youth from a different viewpoint. I don't know. There was just something in this person's writing that sounds like they've lost their way and so young. That's my take, and my take only.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:College delays growing up. The party hard way of life is turning too many people into self indulging Peter Pans. When students are having real emotional problems at college they look around at their peers who are stressed out studying or are too drunk and high to walk. College has become a warped world and sets the stage for future self destruction.

By your writing, you sound young and, sadly, cynical. Are you basing your observations on what you see going on with your peers now? Don't base these observations and conclusions on college life solely on the antics of peers who have lost their way with drugs and alcohol. Hopefully, they will have someone who they can reach out to and give them a place to land (as another poster so eloquently stated). Drugs and alcohol do make people self-absorbed (or self-indulgent as you say). Sometimes it's their way of escaping emotional problems and most likely now an addiction.

But that is a path you certainly don't have to take. Right now, it seems like you're angry, disillusioned, and cynical. If you don't have family to talk with then seek out college counseling. Every college campus has someone you can talk with about your perceptions. And don't forget good friends. I promise you those ideas you have can be changed or approached from a different perspective.

Give yourself a chance and best of luck to you. College can be a wonderful place for growth, friendships, and opportunities.

What a classy response. Now, that I re-read, PP does sound young. Thank you for providing another viewpoint. There is more than one way to address a thread where others might benefit.

+1. Thanks, PP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^Not the poster but you've got to be kidding! 15:07 was pretty crass.

I'm 15:07 and I'm a long-time poster here. I'm also really po'd at the new element from Recent Topics or the Troll Bridge.

My post wasn't crass--I didn't curse, I just laid it all out bluntly. In fact, it was better than that troll deserved. Because this new troll is tearing up several threads a day, I actually think more rudeness wouldn't have been out of place. But I held back.

Yes, I'm completely annoyed with this new poster, and it shows. She had already destroyed the thread anyway.

I responded just above before I read this post. I agree with you. I think that poster must be the one who says something out of line and then whenever she's called on it, she barges in with profanities or other nonsense to act like she's a different poster, defending her own bad post. We really had a good and supportive thing going here. . . .

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:College delays growing up. The party hard way of life is turning too many people into self indulging Peter Pans. When students are having real emotional problems at college they look around at their peers who are stressed out studying or are too drunk and high to walk. College has become a warped world and sets the stage for future self destruction.

By your writing, you sound young and, sadly, cynical. Are you basing your observations on what you see going on with your peers now? Don't base these observations and conclusions on college life solely on the antics of peers who have lost their way with drugs and alcohol. Hopefully, they will have someone who they can reach out to and give them a place to land (as another poster so eloquently stated). Drugs and alcohol do make people self-absorbed (or self-indulgent as you say). Sometimes it's their way of escaping emotional problems and most likely now an addiction.

But that is a path you certainly don't have to take. Right now, it seems like you're angry, disillusioned, and cynical. If you don't have family to talk with then seek out college counseling. Every college campus has someone you can talk with about your perceptions. And don't forget good friends. I promise you those ideas you have can be changed or approached from a different perspective.

Give yourself a chance and best of luck to you. College can be a wonderful place for growth, friendships, and opportunities.

What a classy response. Now, that I re-read, PP does sound young. Thank you for providing another viewpoint. There is more than one way to address a thread where others might benefit.

I really wish we could isolate the poster criticizing 15:07. I'm certain s/he's swooped in here and on other current college threads and shoots oddly inappropriate daggers. S/he may or may not be the poster who throws out the "you suck/dick" but almost just as bad. Her posts attack a completely innocent post or attack a post that's actually pointing out an offensive post (probably because it's hers and she's just sock puppeting). Whatever, s/he's really wrecking things here. And the you suck/dick poster has to go as well. Hopefully it's only one miserable soul.

Anonymous wrote:College delays growing up. The party hard way of life is turning too many people into self indulging Peter Pans. When students are having real emotional problems at college they look around at their peers who are stressed out studying or are too drunk and high to walk. College has become a warped world and sets the stage for future self destruction.

By your writing, you sound young and, sadly, cynical. Are you basing your observations on what you see going on with your peers now? Don't base these observations and conclusions on college life solely on the antics of peers who have lost their way with drugs and alcohol. Hopefully, they will have someone who they can reach out to and give them a place to land (as another poster so eloquently stated). Drugs and alcohol do make people self-absorbed (or self-indulgent as you say). Sometimes it's their way of escaping emotional problems and most likely now an addiction.

But that is a path you certainly don't have to take. Right now, it seems like you're angry, disillusioned, and cynical. If you don't have family to talk with then seek out college counseling. Every college campus has someone you can talk with about your perceptions. And don't forget good friends. I promise you those ideas you have can be changed or approached from a different perspective.

Give yourself a chance and best of luck to you. College can be a wonderful place for growth, friendships, and opportunities.

Anonymous wrote:^^Not the poster but you've got to be kidding! 15:07 was pretty crass.

I'm 15:07 and I'm a long-time poster here. I'm also really po'd at the new element from Recent Topics or the Troll Bridge.

My post wasn't crass--I didn't curse, I just laid it all out bluntly. In fact, it was better than that troll deserved. Because this new troll is tearing up several threads a day, I actually think more rudeness wouldn't have been out of place. But I held back.

Yes, I'm completely annoyed with this new poster, and it shows. She had already destroyed the thread anyway.