Anonymous wrote:I've been the guy in this scenario, and it does not work to say, "don't do X any more."

I truly doubt that throwing her shoes out will be more effective. How about you bargain. "I'll stop chewing with my mouth open/scratching my balls in public if you put your shoes back." Yes, I've been the wife in these situations.

I've been the guy in this scenario, and it does not work to say, "don't do X any more."

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DW likes to take her shoes off when she gets home. The problem is that she leaves them in the middle of the kitchen floor, where I have to step over them all night long, until she puts them on the next morning. We have a shoe rack right by the door into the house, but she does not use it for some reason. Can I just tell her I'll start throwing her shoes in the garbage when she leaves them in the middle of the floor?

Would you all agree that's an appropriate approach?

You could put them somewhere, anywhere, but preferably somewhere she won't easily find them. Then when she says "Honey, did you see my shoes?" You can say "What shoes?" Then when she said "the ones in the kitchen" you can say "Who would leave their shoes in the kitchen? There's a shoe rack for shoes. I bet nobody who puts their shoes in the shoe rack loses their shoes."

After a few times she might catch on. Do I sound like I speak from experience? Because I speak from experience.

That doesn't sound effective, because she'll say, "Why are you being a passive aggressive dickhead?".

And the guy says, "Because you don't respond when I use the adult approach of direct communication."

And then she says, "Because you didn't use the adult approach of direct communication." Neither throwing her shoes out, or putting them on the kitchen table, is direct. How about the guy just says, "Honey, I love you dearly, but I'm getting tired of moving your shoes from the floor to the shoe rack."

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
I'm OK with the $350,000 posters. But I'm sick of self-proclaimed 1 percenters who are pretending to be in a panic about where to stash their assets and when to realize their income. I don't believe half of them are actually 1 percenters anyway, they're just bitter, middle class Romney supporters.

"Realize their income"? Please, tell us more.


http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_difference_b...lized_income_unrealized_income

If you were a 1 percenter, you'd know this.


I have never heard of someone "realizing their income" as you put it. One can have realized income or unrealized income. I think that is why the PP said " Please tell us more."


Oh puhleaze. You clearly haven't been around financial advisors and other folks much. You guys on the 1% thread are such poseurs.

Winner winner chicken dinner! True that!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't want to hear about how "sad" you feel that it has "come to this" -- nannies and the "help" "raising" "our" children. They are not your children. Do not worry about it. Worry about your own children. And, yes, how you will get back into the job market in ten years.

This. This situation is real. I have a sister who has been a SAHM for 9 years now and is now trying to get back in the work force. She is a lawyer and has not received any callbacks from jobs she has applied to. Her self esteem is now completely shot. I took about 9 months off when my DC was born and she browbeat me about my decision to go back to a job that I enjoy. I love my sister and know she loves me but through many of her comments it is clear she is increasingly jealous of the fact I have a career and she no longer does.

But why is your sister the slightest bit surprised that she doesn't have multiple callbacks after 9 years? WTH do you think I worked for years on very little sleep? DUH.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DW likes to take her shoes off when she gets home. The problem is that she leaves them in the middle of the kitchen floor, where I have to step over them all night long, until she puts them on the next morning. We have a shoe rack right by the door into the house, but she does not use it for some reason. Can I just tell her I'll start throwing her shoes in the garbage when she leaves them in the middle of the floor?

Would you all agree that's an appropriate approach?

You could put them somewhere, anywhere, but preferably somewhere she won't easily find them. Then when she says "Honey, did you see my shoes?" You can say "What shoes?" Then when she said "the ones in the kitchen" you can say "Who would leave their shoes in the kitchen? There's a shoe rack for shoes. I bet nobody who puts their shoes in the shoe rack loses their shoes."

After a few times she might catch on. Do I sound like I speak from experience? Because I speak from experience.

That doesn't sound effective, because she'll say, "Why are you being a passive aggressive dickhead?".

And the guy says, "Because you don't respond when I use the adult approach of direct communication."

Anonymous wrote:
Nope. NP means "new poster," I believe. In any case, I use the term that way and I am new to this thread. But I find your posts pretty recognizable. There are some people (like Chipotle Lady) who are just like that. You appear to be one of them.

So, why didn't you go after the jerk who called OP a b!tch? Instead you went after my "oh puhleaze", which is really tame. If I followed your lead and engaged in DCUM telepathy, I'd have to wonder if you're really a NP at all. If you insist on defending these rude so-called 1 percenters, however, I'll treat you the same way that I treat them.

You may think we're all the same poster, but I assure you, we're not. Lots of people use the phrase "please," including the people you're defending who, in my book, take the cake for gratuitous rudeness.

Here's my personal perspective, though. I've been on DCUM a few years now. I'm really sick of the gratuitous rudeness here. I've also noticed a lot of the gratuitous rudeness and snarkiness seems to come from posters who think, or at least they claim anonymously, they're somehow "elite." They're like 5-year-olds. I've come to realize, watching them and interacting with them myself, that being reasonable gets you nowhere. So now I'm just rude right back to them, and I think "puhleaze" is pretty tame compared to the snark about OP's Derwood house,

You, however, are welcome to ignore all of us.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP here. I'm tired of the "oh please" lady. I've yet to read a post from her that is either insightful or helpful in any other way. She simply seems to thrive on being condescending and mean. She confuses hardness with strength.

Was that your post on never having heard the phrase "realizing income"? One of the posts with the link to the definition was mine, and then "oh puhleaze."

I'm not going to apologize for being rude to those poseurs on the 1% thread. I don't believe half of them are really 1 percenters, and their ignorance on subjects like this just proves it. That whole thread is an excuse for being brutally rude about Obama's win. I'm going to guess the snark aimed at OP about Derwood is from one of the same idiot poseurs.

Also, there seem to be a gazillion posters who use the phrase "oh please."

Nope. NP means "new poster," I believe. In any case, I use the term that way and I am new to this thread. But I find your posts pretty recognizable. There are some people (like Chipotle Lady) who are just like that. You appear to be one of them.

Anonymous wrote:NP here. I'm tired of the "oh please" lady. I've yet to read a post from her that is either insightful or helpful in any other way. She simply seems to thrive on being condescending and mean. She confuses hardness with strength.

Was that your post on never having heard the phrase "realizing income"? One of the posts with the link to the definition was mine, and then "oh puhleaze."

I'm not going to apologize for being rude to those poseurs on the 1% thread. I don't believe half of them are really 1 percenters, and their ignorance on subjects like this just proves it. That whole thread is an excuse for being brutally rude about Obama's win. I'm going to guess the snark aimed at OP about Derwood is from one of the same idiot poseurs.

Also, there seem to be a gazillion posters who use the phrase "oh please."

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason the whining about making 300k+ is annoying is because it's not an actual problem- you make more than 90% of the people in America, and you're still in the top % in this region as well. You're saving money. You're helping your parents. You live in school districts that are good. But somehow, that's a problem? Because... you don't feel rich? You don't drive a Mercedes? It's VERY HARD to sympathize with this, and the way some people write about their situation does not make it any easier.

Yes, but why get worked up? Just ignore them.

OP can't ignore them because OP wants to be them.

I am OP.

I am going to buy a house in this area soon, with cash.

That is all I'm going to say.

Watch out Derwood, here comes Ms. Rich Lady who's all "I'm buying my house cash y'all. That's right - I'm rich, bitch!".

I think OP has the right idea. Paying cash for a house at whatever you can afford beats whining about your huge mortgage on a $800K-plus McMansion, in so, so many ways. The rest of us not having to listen to you whine about how hard it is to pay your mortgage on your $300K income is the least of these advantages.

Sure, there's the mortgage interest deduction, but there's a lot to be said for taking all those interest payments and investing them instead.

NP here. I'm tired of the "oh please" lady. I've yet to read a post from her that is either insightful or helpful in any other way. She simply seems to thrive on being condescending and mean. She confuses hardness with strength.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm OK with the $350,000 posters. But I'm sick of self-proclaimed 1 percenters who are pretending to be in a panic about where to stash their assets and when to realize their income. I don't believe half of them are actually 1 percenters anyway, they're just bitter, middle class Romney supporters.

"Realize their income"? Please, tell us more.

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_difference_between_realized_income_unrealized_income

If you were a 1 percenter, you'd know this.

I have never heard of someone "realizing their income" as you put it. One can have realized income or unrealized income. I think that is why the PP said " Please tell us more."

Oh puhleaze. You clearly haven't been around financial advisors and other folks much. You guys on the 1% thread are such poseurs.

Anonymous wrote:My DW likes to take her shoes off when she gets home. The problem is that she leaves them in the middle of the kitchen floor, where I have to step over them all night long, until she puts them on the next morning. We have a shoe rack right by the door into the house, but she does not use it for some reason. Can I just tell her I'll start throwing her shoes in the garbage when she leaves them in the middle of the floor?

Would you all agree that's an appropriate approach?

Maybe if you bought her Prada shoes for her birthday, she wouldn't be so careless.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason the whining about making 300k+ is annoying is because it's not an actual problem- you make more than 90% of the people in America, and you're still in the top % in this region as well. You're saving money. You're helping your parents. You live in school districts that are good. But somehow, that's a problem? Because... you don't feel rich? You don't drive a Mercedes? It's VERY HARD to sympathize with this, and the way some people write about their situation does not make it any easier.

Yes, but why get worked up? Just ignore them.

OP can't ignore them because OP wants to be them.

I am OP.

I am going to buy a house in this area soon, with cash.

That is all I'm going to say.

Watch out Derwood, here comes Ms. Rich Lady who's all "I'm buying my house cash y'all. That's right - I'm rich, bitch!".

Anonymous wrote:I don't want to hear about how "sad" you feel that it has "come to this" -- nannies and the "help" "raising" "our" children. They are not your children. Do not worry about it. Worry about your own children. And, yes, how you will get back into the job market in ten years.

This. This situation is real. I have a sister who has been a SAHM for 9 years now and is now trying to get back in the work force. She is a lawyer and has not received any callbacks from jobs she has applied to. Her self esteem is now completely shot. I took about 9 months off when my DC was born and she browbeat me about my decision to go back to a job that I enjoy. I love my sister and know she loves me but through many of her comments it is clear she is increasingly jealous of the fact I have a career and she no longer does.