Let me put this another way: why should it matter what you think about someone else's choices?
What a sense of humor you have! Given all the various opinions on a wide range of DCUM topics (including people's choices in different situations), you're hilarious to ask this question!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Are you saying adoption as a contraceptive method? No worry about a 'surprise' because you can leave it in the hospital?Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I don't believe government forcing women to have babies.
i don't either, but i also wish that we could get to a place in our culture so that women who are accidentally pregnant are encouraged to have the baby and place it for adoption. it seems to me that now there is more stigma attached to carrying a child to term than having an abortion (seriously, there are women on here who talk proudly about how many abortions they have had). there are women who are cavalier about pregnancy and i find that sickening. I realize this is my world view and I'm not trying to impose it on anyone else.
Can we not just increase womens rights, so surprise pregnancies actually mean that the man is on the hook for child support, and that the mother gets paid maternity leave, and can get child care subsidies and wic if she needs?
Baby scoop era is over and you cannot treat women like that anymore
Maybe, and i know i won't articulate this well, but i sometimes think that women have dug a pretty deep hole regarding holding men responsible by making abortion a women's only issue and decision. if the putative father doesn't have a right to a say in whether the woman has an abortion, how can we then say he HAS to be responsible if she decides to go on with the pregnancy. i promise i'm not being glib -- i really do wrestle with this issue because i think fathers SHOULD be required to be responsible.
as to the leaving babies in the hospital, i'm not advocating that women MUST continue with a pregnancy and place the baby for adoption, but rather that more of the 3/4 of the 1.3 million women i 2008 who had abortions in whole or in part because having a child would interfere with life, for example, would opt to continue with the pregnancy and place the child for adoption. that we could get over the notion that an unexpected pregnancy is a death sentence and a life ender and that more women would become accident surrogates, in an odd way, rather than choose abortion. may sound backwards and heinous, but that's how i feel.
Absurd. The men do get a choice. They choose whether to have sex, whether to use birth control. They may not have the identical choices that women do or as many choices, but they get a choice. It's ot like "Gattica" - I'm not vaccuuming your keyboard too obtain your dna. You choose whether or not to leave it in a place that causes babies. Might as well complain that it's unfair the earth is round or only women can breastfeed. Or maybewomen should complain that it's really not fair that men get the same parental rights as women, after all the woman does alk the work to create the life. But that's just the way it is. It's not fair, to either gender grankly. It's biology.
Additionally it is not in the greater interest of society to allow males to opt out of responsibility for children they have sired, wanted or not.
Frankly I think the status quo on this issue is right and reasonable.
Same for women. They should be responsible for their choice to have unprotected sex and not use abortion as a means of birth control--which many women do (not referring to children conceived by rape or incest and not referring to situations in which the mother's or baby's life is endangered, etc)
Having an abortion IS being responsible for their choice to have sex.
Actually, for many women, it's a "convenient" way out of a situation that came about because they irresponsibly had sex without protection.
So? Seriously, let's assume what you're saying is true. Let's say I had sex, and in the heat of the moment, didn't use a condom (or I forgot that antibiotics would cancel out my oral contraceptives, or whatever). And now I'm pregnant -- oops! But I don't want to be, because I'm single and not exactly rolling in cash and frankly am not ready to have a kid. As time machines have not yet been invented, I don't have the option of going back in time and telling myself not to have sex (and, you know what? In this scenario, the sex was awesome and I don't regret it). So, I go to the doctor and get an abortion, which is costly and uncomfortable, because I'm not up for 9 months of pregnancy, labor and delivery. I have now officially Taken Responsibility For My Actions. Yay, me! I have absolutely zero problems with this scenario.
Pretty much a callous, flip way of sharing your feelings about aborting your offspring. As you've described the scenario, it's not a big deal emotionally and could happen again. I happen to think that both men AND women should be making more responsible decisions ahead of time instead of viewing abortion as a convenience. Again, I'm not referring to the kinds of situations (rape, incest, health of mother/baby, etc) where far more is involved than mere convenience.
Yup, could happen again. And actually, I agree with you -- I think the scenario I described above is an example of someone behaving irresponsibly (but only to the extent that she wasn't on birth control). But here's the thing: (1) I don't see why having an abortion is seen as avoiding responsibility, when it's actually an example of someone evaluating the situation, deciding how best to proceed given the risks and circumstances, and making a proactive decision to fix their mistake, but more importantly (b) I don't think the fact that the person described above isn't behaving as morally as I would want her to, or making the choices I would, is any reason to take away her right to make medical decisions that affect her body. I think people who gorge themselves on fast food and have a heart attack should get treatment at an ER even if they can't pay. I think ambulances should come and assist drunk drivers that get into accidents. I think that my own choices and moral codes are just that: MY CHOICES, not anyone elses, and they certainly shouldn't be the basis for legal prohibition.
Let me put this another way: why should it matter what you think about someone else's choices?[/quote]
What a sense of humor you have! Given all the various opinions on a wide range of DCUM topics (including people's choices in different situations), you're hilarious to ask this question!