Around here, mortgage alone can easily be over $3000/month and daycare or preschool for just one child can be upwards of $1200/month. I'm a single mom making less than $90K (plus $15K/year in child support) and my fixed expenses are about $4,400/month. If I dropped the internet (which I need for teleworking), directv (which is my entertainment 6 nights a week) and the data plan on my iphone, I'd save almost $200/month, but that's a drop in the bucket considering my $2700 mortgage (+insurance+taxes) and $1400/month preschool.

FP here.

What did I say that gave you the idea of owing "large numbers of favors" to others? We got a few things from 2 friends. I asked if they wanted it back. What else am I expected to do? We're friends an that's what friends do. We give rides o each other, we have dinner together, we go to wolf trap for concerts, we throw parties, we talk when we need a shoulder and we pass stuff along when we don't need it anymore. Do you keep tabs on such things? Ew! I'm glad we're not friends, then.

(I'm laughing inside now thinking of that episode of The Office where Dwight and Andy follow each other around returning favors LOL)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if Frugal Poster is annoying the hell out of her friends/family ... "You done with that? DD could really use ***"

I also wonder what she does to reciprocate the favor.

I think you're envious.

Of what? Spending my entire day making watermelon rind jello and finding ways to save money? Asking around for various hand-me-downs?

I also think it's a legitimate question to ask what Frugal poster does to reciprocate the large numbers of favors that seem to be done for her.

For every Frugal Poster, someone, somewhere had to buy that stuff new. Yet another wrinkle in the Paradox of Thrift.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure I'll get flamed right and left for this, but our "bare bones" budget is over 10,000 a month. That includes the usual stuff (mortgage, insurance, food, utilities - no car or student loan debt anymore) plus costs for a property we can't sell and the money we give to our parents to keep them from having to live in a box in their old age. If we had to let something go, we could stop paying for the underwater property but we believe in living up to our obligations and instead are living very frugally in order to pay down that debt as quickly as possible. We'll be clear of it in 3 years. I live for that day...

I don't think there's anything flameworthy in this post - but I do think you're overstating your bare bones budget. Specifically with respect to your underwater property. If you're overpaying and "living very frugally in order to pay down that debt as quickly as possible," that payment is more than required to meet your obligations, and more than your bare bones payment.

Note: I am absolutely not criticizing your chouces - what you are doing is both smart and praiseworthy.

Well, that depends on how you look at it. True, we could legally pay less on a monthly basis. But, we are obligated to the total debt, not just the monthly payment. That we could get away with paying less on a monthly basis without being thrown in jail (or whatever) doesn't change the fact that we still owe the total. Plus, every month that large amount sits there, it gains compound interest and makes it harder and harder to pay back and we end up paying more and more to borrow the principal. So, I don't consider it truly optional to not pay as much as we can. Just because the bank won't repossess or throw us in jail because we paid only the minimum doesn't mean the consequences aren't very, very serious and very immediate. Every month when I see that interest statement it becomes clear that paying the minimum is not a choice. It's just a question of choosing which terrible consequence you face.

Anonymous wrote:Good for you, Frugal Poster. I've never lived a bare bones budget and have no intention of doing so. Half of what we spend is discretionary, and I'm fine with that. Different strokes.

Frugal poster here. ITA. We chose to travel.

Good for you, Frugal Poster. I've never lived a bare bones budget and have no intention of doing so. Half of what we spend is discretionary, and I'm fine with that. Different strokes.

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure I'll get flamed right and left for this, but our "bare bones" budget is over 10,000 a month. That includes the usual stuff (mortgage, insurance, food, utilities - no car or student loan debt anymore) plus costs for a property we can't sell and the money we give to our parents to keep them from having to live in a box in their old age. If we had to let something go, we could stop paying for the underwater property but we believe in living up to our obligations and instead are living very frugally in order to pay down that debt as quickly as possible. We'll be clear of it in 3 years. I live for that day...

I don't think there's anything flameworthy in this post - but I do think you're overstating your bare bones budget. Specifically with respect to your underwater property. If you're overpaying and "living very frugally in order to pay down that debt as quickly as possible," that payment is more than required to meet your obligations, and more than your bare bones payment.

Note: I am absolutely not criticizing your chouces - what you are doing is both smart and praiseworthy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if Frugal Poster is annoying the hell out of her friends/family ... "You done with that? DD could really use ***"

I also wonder what she does to reciprocate the favor.

I think you're envious.

Of what? Spending my entire day making watermelon rind jello and finding ways to save money? Asking around for various hand-me-downs?

I also think it's a legitimate question to ask what Frugal poster does to reciprocate the large numbers of favors that seem to be done for her.

For every Frugal Poster, someone, somewhere had to buy that stuff new. Yet another wrinkle in the Paradox of Thrift.

I'm sure I'll get flamed right and left for this, but our "bare bones" budget is over 10,000 a month. That includes the usual stuff (mortgage, insurance, food, utilities - no car or student loan debt anymore) plus costs for a property we can't sell and the money we give to our parents to keep them from having to live in a box in their old age. If we had to let something go, we could stop paying for the underwater property but we believe in living up to our obligations and instead are living very frugally in order to pay down that debt as quickly as possible. We'll be clear of it in 3 years. I live for that day...

Well my point about getting stuff for my baby from my mom isn't that we are better than people who buy baby stuff or that people who buy baby clothes are spendthrifts, but that baby stuff may be absolutely necessary in some budgets, but it can be a want in other budgets.

WTH are you talking about???
Why in the world you got that impression? People asked me to share how we do it and I shared. Some
of you jumped on me trying to find faults on the math, holes on my budget and mocking our choices and I'm the self righteous one? This gotta be a joke!

And to the curious PP, when we get hand me downs I usually ask if the person wants it back or not. If they do I return it washed/cleaned if not I either pass it to someone in need or donate to my charity of choice at the moment. I thought this is what everybody does, no?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not the Frugal Poster, but I consider anything I buy for my one-year-old DD to be in the want category rather than the need category. Between hand me downs and grammies we have more stuff than we can deal with. If we were struggling and needed to cut back, I would actively seek out hand me downs and be more specific with our moms about what we need.

You're lucky to have really supportive grammies and a lot of friends willing to share their hand me downs!

Not the case with us. My parents are overseas, DH's parents are in Philly and are really cheap. And we're new to the area, so we have to completely fend for ourselves.

I consider stuff for my daughter to be in the 'need' category, because if I don't buy it, she'd have to do without. And a kid does need at least some basic toys, not to mention clothing..

This pretty much captures what's most annoying to me about the frugal poster spending $40 week on groceries. Instead of acknowledging and being grateful for the many, many subsidies in her life, she thinks it makes her more virtuous than the rest of us.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if Frugal Poster is annoying the hell out of her friends/family ... "You done with that? DD could really use ***"

I also wonder what she does to reciprocate the favor.

I'm sure she passes out plenty watermelon rind jello.

Hm... you too!

If you ever came to my home you (or your kids) probably ate it and didn't even notice.

Wait until you learn that the bread is enriched with egg shells. 8)

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if Frugal Poster is annoying the hell out of her friends/family ... "You done with that? DD could really use ***"

I also wonder what she does to reciprocate the favor.

I think you're envious.

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if Frugal Poster is annoying the hell out of her friends/family ... "You done with that? DD could really use ***"

I also wonder what she does to reciprocate the favor.

I'm sure she passes out plenty watermelon rind jello.

I wonder if Frugal Poster is annoying the hell out of her friends/family ... "You done with that? DD could really use ***"

I also wonder what she does to reciprocate the favor.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:BARE bones (i.e. things that HAVE to paid even if one of us losses our job):

Rent: $1405
Utilities $160
Health/Life Insurance: $400
Car/Renter's Insurance: $150
Food: $400
Baby (Formula/Diapers): $150
Daycare: $900Car Payment$ 400K
Gas $100
Dog: $50
Credit Card: $100
Student Loans: $150
Cell Phones: $150Toiletries: $75

So, about $4600 bare bones. BUT, when you factor in all the "extras" (401K, savings, phone/cable/internet, gas, toys, clothes, eating out, Target outings, BINGO our actual spend is closer to $6000. We are a family of 4 (2 adults, one infant, one dog).

Curious as to why these couldn't be cut of one of you loses a job.

If the person who lost the job is hoping to go back to work, you have to keep daycare or you lose your spot and who knows when you'd get back in!