Anonymous
11/30/2011 18:06
Subject: adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
This is sort of interesting. We have the opposite problem - we make more than our parents ever did, but we often feel like we are behind our friends buying houses now (we both paid for our own educations, saved and paid cash for our wedding, and are saving for a house down payment). But we talk all the time about how much we will want to give to our kids - will we pay for college or want them to do it on their own, etc. How much giving is helpful vs spoiling, etc.
Anonymous
11/09/2011 10:46
Subject: adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
I'm not in the same situation - not expecting much of an inheritance at all - and I agree 100%.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:my college major advisor and friend (now in his 80s) grew up without a lot of money as a child of the Depression and later married a DuPont (to whom he is still married 60 some yrs. later, a very nice person btw)...
in a conversation years ago, the context of which I won't go into here, he said to me half-joking and half-seriously "... never turn down money ...."
We've had a little help from parents to buy our first house and have mostly done the rest for ourselves (both work) for the past 25 yrs.+ but now that one set of parents is dead and my father is gone, the money working its way towards us and to my brother gives us the freedom to have a cushion for future medical needs or emergencies, and other non-frivolous/ non extravagant things we may want to do (a house addition without taking on debt; retiring at 60-62 instead of 67-70, spend more time volunteering, etc.).
We accept it gratefully and graciously and realize how lucky we are and we don't ratchet up our lifestyle like too many people do.
And there's nothing wrong with that IMO.
Envy is a destructive trait that will not help anyone to be a better or more contented person. I hope the OP can get over it, if it's as much of an issue as it seems to the OP or others who feel the same, some therapy might be in order to help you/them lead more positively-oriented lives.
I'm in the same situation and agree 100% with all of this.
Anonymous
11/09/2011 10:36
Subject: Re:adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
My grandmother used to say, "You always see those who have more, but you never see all those who have less." Give the Max today to your charity of choice and stop the envy cycle.
Anonymous
11/09/2011 10:34
Subject: adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
Anonymous wrote:my college major advisor and friend (now in his 80s) grew up without a lot of money as a child of the Depression and later married a DuPont (to whom he is still married 60 some yrs. later, a very nice person btw)...
in a conversation years ago, the context of which I won't go into here, he said to me half-joking and half-seriously "... never turn down money ...."
We've had a little help from parents to buy our first house and have mostly done the rest for ourselves (both work) for the past 25 yrs.+ but now that one set of parents is dead and my father is gone, the money working its way towards us and to my brother gives us the freedom to have a cushion for future medical needs or emergencies, and other non-frivolous/ non extravagant things we may want to do (a house addition without taking on debt; retiring at 60-62 instead of 67-70, spend more time volunteering, etc.).
We accept it gratefully and graciously and realize how lucky we are and we don't ratchet up our lifestyle like too many people do.
And there's nothing wrong with that IMO.
Envy is a destructive trait that will not help anyone to be a better or more contented person. I hope the OP can get over it, if it's as much of an issue as it seems to the OP or others who feel the same, some therapy might be in order to help you/them lead more positively-oriented lives.
I'm in the same situation and agree 100% with all of this.
Anonymous
11/09/2011 09:13
Subject: adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
my college major advisor and friend (now in his 80s) grew up without a lot of money as a child of the Depression and later married a DuPont (to whom he is still married 60 some yrs. later, a very nice person btw)...
in a conversation years ago, the context of which I won't go into here, he said to me half-joking and half-seriously "... never turn down money ...."
We've had a little help from parents to buy our first house and have mostly done the rest for ourselves (both work) for the past 25 yrs.+ but now that one set of parents is dead and my father is gone, the money working its way towards us and to my brother gives us the freedom to have a cushion for future medical needs or emergencies, and other non-frivolous/ non extravagant things we may want to do (a house addition without taking on debt; retiring at 60-62 instead of 67-70, spend more time volunteering, etc.).
We accept it gratefully and graciously and realize how lucky we are and we don't ratchet up our lifestyle like too many people do.
And there's nothing wrong with that IMO.
Envy is a destructive trait that will not help anyone to be a better or more contented person. I hope the OP can get over it, if it's as much of an issue as it seems to the OP or others who feel the same, some therapy might be in order to help you/them lead more positively-oriented lives.
in a conversation years ago, the context of which I won't go into here, he said to me half-joking and half-seriously "... never turn down money ...."
We've had a little help from parents to buy our first house and have mostly done the rest for ourselves (both work) for the past 25 yrs.+ but now that one set of parents is dead and my father is gone, the money working its way towards us and to my brother gives us the freedom to have a cushion for future medical needs or emergencies, and other non-frivolous/ non extravagant things we may want to do (a house addition without taking on debt; retiring at 60-62 instead of 67-70, spend more time volunteering, etc.).
We accept it gratefully and graciously and realize how lucky we are and we don't ratchet up our lifestyle like too many people do.
And there's nothing wrong with that IMO.
Envy is a destructive trait that will not help anyone to be a better or more contented person. I hope the OP can get over it, if it's as much of an issue as it seems to the OP or others who feel the same, some therapy might be in order to help you/them lead more positively-oriented lives.
Anonymous
11/09/2011 09:08
Subject: adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
As someone who grew up poor but who has made a lot of money, this thread is very curious to me. I don't think that excessive consumption is exactly virtuous.
But I wonder what on earth posters expect of these children? For the most part they either inherited money, or they are due to inherit money and their family's regular gifting is tax-efficient. So now that they have money, should they pretend that it doesn't exist?
I think about this because my children will be in this situation. What is a socially acceptable way for them to use this money? If buying a house is out, then what?
But I wonder what on earth posters expect of these children? For the most part they either inherited money, or they are due to inherit money and their family's regular gifting is tax-efficient. So now that they have money, should they pretend that it doesn't exist?
I think about this because my children will be in this situation. What is a socially acceptable way for them to use this money? If buying a house is out, then what?
Anonymous
11/09/2011 08:35
Subject: Re:adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
Anonymous wrote:
I have not read all the posts here but I did start a thread on trust funds a long time ago. I feel sorry for those living off parents money which is very common in this town. When things don't "add up" there is always family money involved!!!!!!!!!
And, so what? This affects you how?
Anonymous
11/09/2011 08:11
Subject: Re:adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
I have not read all the posts here but I did start a thread on trust funds a long time ago. I feel sorry for those living off parents money which is very common in this town. When things don't "add up" there is always family money involved!!!!!!!!!
Anonymous
11/08/2011 16:17
Subject: Re:adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
15:02, are you reading the same website I'm reading? Nobody in the real estate forum who is answering the "house for $750,000" thread seems to think that OP is bragging. So is it only bragging when mentioned in Off Topic and when it's not the main point of the post?
The profane posters ought to take a gander at the "we are looking for a $3 million house" thread in that forum.
The profane posters ought to take a gander at the "we are looking for a $3 million house" thread in that forum.
Anonymous
11/08/2011 16:01
Subject: adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
15:15 - don't bother. Especially if you are self made. People have no concept of that here, they are still attached to their mothers teet. They should be ashamed of themselves, as grown adults. Being a responsible, well adjusted adult means NOT having champagne taste on a beer budget.
Anonymous
11/08/2011 15:15
Subject: Re:adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
You all are out of your minds. Our house at $750,000 is firmly in the middle in our neighborhood. Two houses have sold for over $1.5 million in the past 18 months. My only point was that people who live off their parents' money would annoy me if I didn't MYOB. If I were bragging, I'd tell you about our net worth or how one of us could afford to SAH, etc., etc. but I didn't. Sheesh.
Anonymous
11/08/2011 15:02
Subject: Re:adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why do you care? My kids live in a $750,000 house that both of their parents worked their asses off to provide. To me, that's the bomb, not worrying about how other people are financially supported. MYOB and you'll be much happier.
You can take the person out of the trailer park but not the trailer park out of the person.
Was this to me or the person who replied to this with profanity?
YOU, as in you're from the trailer park boasting about your given 750k house.
P.S.
FUCK U
You totally misunderstand me. Hard work and financial success make me seem defensive? (?)
BRAGGING about it does.
You can't see that?
You're oozing with insecurity.
ROFL that's not bragging.
My kids live in a $750,000 house that both of their parents worked their asses off to provide. To me, that's the bomb,
really?
While $750K isn't a mansion, it's enough put people off. Don't you think that if Bragging PP posts this on an anonymous forum, she's also walking around with a pole up her ass? (Maybe she needs the pole to keep her ass up, as it's been working "hard enough" lately.)
Anonymous
11/08/2011 14:54
Subject: Re:adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why do you care? My kids live in a $750,000 house that both of their parents worked their asses off to provide. To me, that's the bomb, not worrying about how other people are financially supported. MYOB and you'll be much happier.
You can take the person out of the trailer park but not the trailer park out of the person.
Was this to me or the person who replied to this with profanity?
YOU, as in you're from the trailer park boasting about your given 750k house.
P.S.
FUCK U
You totally misunderstand me. Hard work and financial success make me seem defensive? (?)
BRAGGING about it does.
You can't see that?
You're oozing with insecurity.
ROFL that's not bragging.
Anonymous
11/08/2011 14:51
Subject: adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
DCUM - Class all the way!
Anonymous
11/08/2011 14:49
Subject: Re:adults who live off their parents' money secretly annoy me (and i don't understand them)
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why do you care? My kids live in a $750,000 house that both of their parents worked their asses off to provide. To me, that's the bomb, not worrying about how other people are financially supported. MYOB and you'll be much happier.
You can take the person out of the trailer park but not the trailer park out of the person.
Was this to me or the person who replied to this with profanity?
YOU, as in you're from the trailer park boasting about your given 750k house.
P.S.
FUCK U
You totally misunderstand me. Hard work and financial success make me seem defensive? (?)
BRAGGING about it does.
You can't see that?
You're oozing with insecurity.