Anonymous
Post 03/13/2026 16:21     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:EVERYONE on here would agree -- if we're all being honest -- that it's really lovely to see a well-groomed and well-dressed (and well behaved) random family on a Sunday morning or Sunday afternoon. Why? Why does it make us instinctively smile and give us some sort of dopamine rush to see such effort and appearance in another family?

If that's a perfectly normal reaction to seeing a well-groomed family, then to the contrary can also stoke legitimate feelings of being bothered. It is perfectly natural and reasonable to want to see people put some effort into their appearance in your church.


No, I don't agree with your premise at all. That is not how I react to seeing a family dressed up.


+1
Anonymous
Post 03/13/2026 16:20     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I know I sound both old and old fashioned but I love seeing clean cut families put effort into their appearance. Boys in chinos and a tucked in shirt, dad in a blazer or suit (or at least a collared shirt under a nice sweater), mom and gals in dresses. Everyone's hair styled nicely. It displays such an appreciation and respect for the church and the service. We'll probably never return to that but semi-casual is still nice to see. However, the hooded sweatshirts, baggy fleece pants... untucked shirts... kids wearing t-shirts under a jacket... sporty sneakers... I hate it. Often parents are dressed nice but the kids look like they just rolled out of bed. It's not a wealth thing, it's a caring thing.


Yep. Western civ was nice while it lasted. Now everyone looks like sh!t. Not just church: air travel, public transit, buying groceries.


I was going to write that clothing is the least of western civ's problems right now ... but actually, this idea that other people are scenery in your life, such that you get annoyed when the scenery is not pleasing to you, is pretty central to what's wrong.


No, you miss the point with myopic flair. It's not that other people are mere scenery. It's that we are all interdependent in creating a lovely social fabric. When some people decline to participate, those who still make an effort become understandably annoyed.


Lol. Ok.

You hear that folks? Wear nice clothes to create that "lovely social fabric." Coming to you from 1984's Junior League...
Anonymous
Post 03/13/2026 16:08     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
It bothers me if something like that bothers me.
Anonymous
Post 03/13/2026 15:21     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
Huh. I like to mind my own business.
Anonymous
Post 03/13/2026 15:05     Subject: Re:Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
No. The fact that people even show up to Church is more than enough for me. I do find it bizarre that you're at Church judging people, though.
Anonymous
Post 03/13/2026 15:03     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
Anonymous wrote:Poor people should have their own places of worship and not attend ones for wealthy and well dressed?


False premise here. Even when much (or even most) of the country was poor, they managed to dress appropriately and neatly for church. Look at historical photographs of even the poorest congregations and they will be making an effort.

They did not shuffle to church in slides and pajamas.
Anonymous
Post 03/13/2026 15:00     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
OP should ask herself why it bothers her to see families super underdressed at church. It's not your place to judge.

God does not care what you are wearing, for He sees all of you as you are. The clothes you have on do not matter.
Anonymous
Post 03/12/2026 07:43     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:EVERYONE on here would agree -- if we're all being honest -- that it's really lovely to see a well-groomed and well-dressed (and well behaved) random family on a Sunday morning or Sunday afternoon. Why? Why does it make us instinctively smile and give us some sort of dopamine rush to see such effort and appearance in another family?

If that's a perfectly normal reaction to seeing a well-groomed family, then to the contrary can also stoke legitimate feelings of being bothered. It is perfectly natural and reasonable to want to see people put some effort into their appearance in your church.


No, I don't agree with your premise at all. That is not how I react to seeing a family dressed up.


How do you react?
Anonymous
Post 03/12/2026 07:43     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:EVERYONE on here would agree -- if we're all being honest -- that it's really lovely to see a well-groomed and well-dressed (and well behaved) random family on a Sunday morning or Sunday afternoon. Why? Why does it make us instinctively smile and give us some sort of dopamine rush to see such effort and appearance in another family?

If that's a perfectly normal reaction to seeing a well-groomed family, then to the contrary can also stoke legitimate feelings of being bothered. It is perfectly natural and reasonable to want to see people put some effort into their appearance in your church.


No, I don't agree with your premise at all. That is not how I react to seeing a family dressed up.
Anonymous
Post 03/11/2026 13:23     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
Anonymous wrote:EVERYONE on here would agree -- if we're all being honest -- that it's really lovely to see a well-groomed and well-dressed (and well behaved) random family on a Sunday morning or Sunday afternoon. Why? Why does it make us instinctively smile and give us some sort of dopamine rush to see such effort and appearance in another family?

If that's a perfectly normal reaction to seeing a well-groomed family, then to the contrary can also stoke legitimate feelings of being bothered. It is perfectly natural and reasonable to want to see people put some effort into their appearance in your church.


No, I don't agree with your premise at all. That is not how I react to seeing a family dressed up.
Anonymous
Post 03/11/2026 13:09     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
Anonymous wrote:We have an agreement with teen DCs, if attending Sun AM they dress for the occasion. Sat/Sub evening Mass, jeans and a nice top.


That seems to track with what I see at evening Saturday mass vs. morning Sunday mass. Is this a known, like unwritten rule custom sort of thing or is it an organic thing?
Anonymous
Post 03/11/2026 12:58     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
Well, clergy (of all religions) favors wealthy for sure. Wealthy pay their bills and build their fancy buildings. I don't know about God's intentions but for most apparent reasons, he is kinder to them.
Anonymous
Post 03/11/2026 05:35     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
We have an agreement with teen DCs, if attending Sun AM they dress for the occasion. Sat/Sub evening Mass, jeans and a nice top.
Anonymous
Post 03/11/2026 02:18     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
Anonymous wrote:Poor people should have their own places of worship and not attend ones for wealthy and well dressed?

Do you go to a church that relies heavily on tithes and donations?
Perhaps you could tell that family that they can use some of the money they intended to donate to the church on brand name clothing instead
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2026 22:29     Subject: Does it bother you to see families super underdressed at church?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I know I sound both old and old fashioned but I love seeing clean cut families put effort into their appearance. Boys in chinos and a tucked in shirt, dad in a blazer or suit (or at least a collared shirt under a nice sweater), mom and gals in dresses. Everyone's hair styled nicely. It displays such an appreciation and respect for the church and the service. We'll probably never return to that but semi-casual is still nice to see. However, the hooded sweatshirts, baggy fleece pants... untucked shirts... kids wearing t-shirts under a jacket... sporty sneakers... I hate it. Often parents are dressed nice but the kids look like they just rolled out of bed. It's not a wealth thing, it's a caring thing.


Yep. Western civ was nice while it lasted. Now everyone looks like sh!t. Not just church: air travel, public transit, buying groceries.


I was going to write that clothing is the least of western civ's problems right now ... but actually, this idea that other people are scenery in your life, such that you get annoyed when the scenery is not pleasing to you, is pretty central to what's wrong.


I think it’s more the broken window theory but about people. Perhaps people are more likely to be well behaved and civil when dressed nicely? Is this a factor in the breakdown of behavior in public places? I am not saying it is but it’s a theory.


I think the theory holds.


I agree.