Anonymous wrote:OP is envious of the queen B because she wants to be the queen B but can't hack it.

Try not being a B.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:haha +1 to the Unitarian Church (All Souls) and truly none of these women there

Where to NOT spend time: hanging out with lawyers, anyone who does PR, lobbyists or Hill types

Yes to nonprofits, making friends with former Peace Corps volunteers. Don't laugh, but I began to love living in DC when I escaped the Hill bubble I was in and made friends with a bunch of RPCVs. Career Feds, think tankers (but they have other obnoxious tendencies) or anyone in a mission-driven career are also all over DC in droves.

Oh no. NO to nonprofits. This woman is all over the big national nonprofits based in DC. She’s often the #1,2 or 3 there. She can afford this because her amiable beta husband makes a ton if money due to his college athlete network

Anonymous wrote:People don't think about you nearly as much as you seem to think they do, OP. What an odd, unrelatable post. What on EARTH are you prattling on about?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ah, yes, the competitive DC sanctimommy. Always first to kiss an ass if there are social points involved, will humblebrag you to death, and frequently "helpful" in ways that are nothing but condescending twattery.

How to avoid: Go somewhere volunteers are expected to perform a meaningful service, not just show off. The PTA is obviously out (PTAs are known mommymartyr showcases). Try sorting clothes at A Wider Circle or serving food at SOME (So Others Might Eat). Don't go anywhere the volunteers are there to specifically help those in leadership/power positions (again, think of the PTA and whose asses are getting kissed). Avoid anywhere that's a photo op, or somewhere volunteers get recognition beyond a simple "thank you".

But honestly? In this area, they're hard to avoid. Your best bet is to learn to ignore, but reserve an ice-cold burn or cut for when they pipe off. Understand that they're going to talk about you anyway and be willing to weaponize it. Calling them out just calls in their flying monkeys. You have to 'bless your heart' them, excessively, in public, in a way that points out what fake-ass nonsense they are full of. Do it right, and they'll start kissing YOUR ass, just to shut you up.

I don't know how to avoid them but I know how to get them to avoid me. I am on the autistic spectrum and spent the first five years of my son's life living abroad in the developing world with him, so I pulled into Vienna Va. with a little kid dressed in thrifted clothes who had never had a private swimming lesson, joined a competitive chess team, participated in mommy and me kiddie gymnastics etc. I proceeded to put my foot in my mouth at every possible opportunity. The first was when I admitted I had literally never heard of Virginia Tech, I confused special education and gifted classes, when someone was humble bragging about the special travel soccer team their kid was on, I was so clueless that I thought "He's playing on the Nationals" meant the kid was like nationally ranked or something. There's nothing quite like reacting in the wrong way and reacting in such a bizarre way that they literally have no response I highly recommend it.

Yes, this is basically my route, i.e., being the "hopeless case" is an excellent way to ward off the Type A "force of nature"! I have a non-glamorous busy job, but am a bit of a mess otherwise--and being 90% oblivious comes naturally to me. I'm not worth fighting, nor worth befriending/patronizing, but there are enough overlapping social and professional circles that everyone remains civil. I am happy to chat about Virginia Tech, or swim lanes, or their PTA plans... and then move on with everyone happy. Or not. Who knows?