Too much to handle.

So many reasons!
-Couldn’t afford more
-Lack of childcare options
-Both parents work and have to work
-Had difficult pregnancies and 2 C sections

What would have made it happen?
-Easier pregnancies and birth experiences plus the ability to stay home for at least a period of time, maybe a few years.

But I am really happy with two and have no regrets on that front.

We have three but had the third only because our IVF cycle produced a bunch of embryos and it felt somehow wrong to flush them all down the toilet without using at least one. If we had our second naturally, it would have never occurred to me to try for a third.

I guess I am not great at multitasking or keeping long lists in my head because I find managing the lives, activities, clothes, gear, diets, medical appts, schoolwork, emotional development, etc. of two kids to be PLENTY. I honestly don't know how I could do it with more than 2. Mine are teens now and while they no longer need constant watching, there is still a huge mental and emotional load plus chauffeuring, shopping, laundry, etc. and I still don't feel like I could handle a third tween/teen. I am in the midst of well-visits and ortho, plus school supply, clothes and sneaker shopping, plus everything they need for their respective extra curriculars, plus all the practices are about to start back up. Its plenty.

Anonymous wrote:Because people on DCUM who have three kids always seem so unhappy and stressed out with their lives, as if they had NO IDEA how hard it was going to be. Pass.

You must spend a lot of time on DCUM and not be very good at math. DCUM is a small percentage of DC, the US, and the world. The fact that you would look at comments (not aimed at you specifically) on DCUM for guidance on the number of children is mind boggling.

I was unable to have any kids, I tried for years, was here for the infertility forums and stuck around.

We could either adopt or retire eventually, but not both.

Anonymous wrote:Because once my second child finally started sleeping through the night, I had absolutely zero desire to start all over with getting up every few hours again. And by that time, our oldest kid was big enough to start enjoying things that can be really hard for infants, like camping and spending the afternoon out of the house and going to amusement parks. It was just better for all of us to leave the infant stage and move on to the next phase of life.

+1. The 2 I have were keeping me up all night, and there was no way I could add a third into the mix.

Anonymous wrote:I'm the middle of 3 from a dysfunctional family. I would never do that to anyone.

This. I blame the size of my family of origin for ny dysfunction so I thought if I had two things would be better but then I realized that mental illness is heritable and generational dysfunction is something that I have to break though therapy and self awareness. Hope it's not too late!

I got a mother diagnosed with dementia instead. She’s now my third.

I need my "me" time and I would need to be more present with three which even with a nanny was not what I wanted.

Our marriage was strained and I thought three would break it. But then we got divorced anyway.

My husband isn't present that much and I'm
The breadwinner. If I had married someone more stable we would have had three.

We wanted three but started late and between fertility issues and money we couldn't make it work.

I'm the middle of 3 from a dysfunctional family. I would never do that to anyone.

Because I have interests outside of parenting. I enjoy traveling, dining out, sports, reading books, hiking, skiing etc.

I don’t think hanging out with kids is FUN. Love my kids, but they make it more difficult for me to enjoy my life and relax.

Adding another kid would make it even more difficult to enjoy my life and hobbies.

Families with three or more kids are in full on kid mode for years and rarely have much of a life outside of parenting unless they have $$$$$$ and want to outsource significantly. In that case, why have kids?