Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:70% of kids dropout of sports by the age of 13.


There’s an interesting article that describes why -

“ parents invest significant time and money in their kids to train with teams and buy their uniforms. They expect “results." They drive them all over to year-round sports, sometimes more than one during the same season. Oftentimes, perhaps unintentionally, they drive them out of sports entirely.

For a lot of kids, it comes down to the fact that sports become less fun and more about the concept of what success is from more of an adult’s eyes than a child’s eyes,” Moffatt says. "Kids want to stay active, play and have fun with their friends, and winning and losing is something that they care less about.”

About 70 % of kids drop out of organized sports by age 13 and the so-called “professionalization of youth sports” can’t be understated as a significant factor why, according to a new report released Monday by the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).


“In addition, the pressure to succeed at a young age, as well as the perception that this is the most efficacious route to future athletic success, further leads to high volumes of training and loss of enjoyment in sport, both of which can contribute to widespread burnout and attrition among youth athletes.”


https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2024/01/22/70-of-kids-drop-out-of-youth-sports-by-13-new-aap-study-reveals-why/72310189007/

Every time I read these articles I just think to myself: are the authors totally hallucinating and do they not know what high school is like these days? The reason the kids quit at that age is because we make it so difficult to make the high school sports teams at that age and then they choose do other extracurriculars at school if they can’t make the team.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:70% of kids dropout of sports by the age of 13.


There’s an interesting article that describes why -

“ parents invest significant time and money in their kids to train with teams and buy their uniforms. They expect “results." They drive them all over to year-round sports, sometimes more than one during the same season. Oftentimes, perhaps unintentionally, they drive them out of sports entirely.

For a lot of kids, it comes down to the fact that sports become less fun and more about the concept of what success is from more of an adult’s eyes than a child’s eyes,” Moffatt says. "Kids want to stay active, play and have fun with their friends, and winning and losing is something that they care less about.”

About 70 % of kids drop out of organized sports by age 13 and the so-called “professionalization of youth sports” can’t be understated as a significant factor why, according to a new report released Monday by the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).


“In addition, the pressure to succeed at a young age, as well as the perception that this is the most efficacious route to future athletic success, further leads to high volumes of training and loss of enjoyment in sport, both of which can contribute to widespread burnout and attrition among youth athletes.”


https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2024/01/22/70-of-kids-drop-out-of-youth-sports-by-13-new-aap-study-reveals-why/72310189007/

I’ve coached rec and had kids in rec and travel and I don’t think that kids stay or drop out of the sport has much to do with the parents. I’ve seen real jerk parents with kids who love those sports and stay with it and kids with great supportive parents drop out. In my experience the reasons that kids leave or stay is

1. Whether or not the kid likes the activity itself.
2. Does the kid have friends/ get along with their teammates
3. Does that sport have cachet with their social group

I think as parents and coaches we overestimate how much we affect the desires of the kids. My personal example is that my son had a great summer swim season a couple years ago. Beating kids who were year-round, swimmers. He just wanted to be on lacrosse team with his friends, even though he basically spent the whole summer sitting on the bench because he wasn’t really fast enough to make a starting spot. We made him finish out the swim season but he never was on swim team again. But 4 years later he’s still playing lacrosse. He just wanted to be with his friends and gain status in his group.

As the guy footing the bills, it’s frustrating to see my son trade. What was likely a pretty good swim career for a mediocre lacrosse career. But what are you gonna do?

+1

Same experience here with both of my kids. They want to play the sports their friends do, and care more about the social prestige/popularity of the sport. Each is now focusing on a sport that they aren’t really even physically suited for TBH- rather than the sports they are better at and work with their body types. It is annoying but really what can you do?

My kid is the same way. I feel like he is giving up on tennis just because his friends don’t play. He is built much better for it and he has been playing for so long and has such an amazing serve and swing. No one at his middle school cares about tennis so he is losing interest.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:70% of kids dropout of sports by the age of 13.


There’s an interesting article that describes why -

“ parents invest significant time and money in their kids to train with teams and buy their uniforms. They expect “results." They drive them all over to year-round sports, sometimes more than one during the same season. Oftentimes, perhaps unintentionally, they drive them out of sports entirely.

For a lot of kids, it comes down to the fact that sports become less fun and more about the concept of what success is from more of an adult’s eyes than a child’s eyes,” Moffatt says. "Kids want to stay active, play and have fun with their friends, and winning and losing is something that they care less about.”

About 70 % of kids drop out of organized sports by age 13 and the so-called “professionalization of youth sports” can’t be understated as a significant factor why, according to a new report released Monday by the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).


“In addition, the pressure to succeed at a young age, as well as the perception that this is the most efficacious route to future athletic success, further leads to high volumes of training and loss of enjoyment in sport, both of which can contribute to widespread burnout and attrition among youth athletes.”


https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2024/01/22/70-of-kids-drop-out-of-youth-sports-by-13-new-aap-study-reveals-why/72310189007/

I’ve coached rec and had kids in rec and travel and I don’t think that kids stay or drop out of the sport has much to do with the parents. I’ve seen real jerk parents with kids who love those sports and stay with it and kids with great supportive parents drop out. In my experience the reasons that kids leave or stay is

1. Whether or not the kid likes the activity itself.
2. Does the kid have friends/ get along with their teammates
3. Does that sport have cachet with their social group

I think as parents and coaches we overestimate how much we affect the desires of the kids. My personal example is that my son had a great summer swim season a couple years ago. Beating kids who were year-round, swimmers. He just wanted to be on lacrosse team with his friends, even though he basically spent the whole summer sitting on the bench because he wasn’t really fast enough to make a starting spot. We made him finish out the swim season but he never was on swim team again. But 4 years later he’s still playing lacrosse. He just wanted to be with his friends and gain status in his group.

As the guy footing the bills, it’s frustrating to see my son trade. What was likely a pretty good swim career for a mediocre lacrosse career. But what are you gonna do?

+1

Same experience here with both of my kids. They want to play the sports their friends do, and care more about the social prestige/popularity of the sport. Each is now focusing on a sport that they aren’t really even physically suited for TBH- rather than the sports they are better at and work with their body types. It is annoying but really what can you do?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:70% of kids dropout of sports by the age of 13.


There’s an interesting article that describes why -

“ parents invest significant time and money in their kids to train with teams and buy their uniforms. They expect “results." They drive them all over to year-round sports, sometimes more than one during the same season. Oftentimes, perhaps unintentionally, they drive them out of sports entirely.

For a lot of kids, it comes down to the fact that sports become less fun and more about the concept of what success is from more of an adult’s eyes than a child’s eyes,” Moffatt says. "Kids want to stay active, play and have fun with their friends, and winning and losing is something that they care less about.”

About 70 % of kids drop out of organized sports by age 13 and the so-called “professionalization of youth sports” can’t be understated as a significant factor why, according to a new report released Monday by the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).


“In addition, the pressure to succeed at a young age, as well as the perception that this is the most efficacious route to future athletic success, further leads to high volumes of training and loss of enjoyment in sport, both of which can contribute to widespread burnout and attrition among youth athletes.”


https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2024/01/22/70-of-kids-drop-out-of-youth-sports-by-13-new-aap-study-reveals-why/72310189007/

I’ve coached rec and had kids in rec and travel and I don’t think that kids stay or drop out of the sport has much to do with the parents. I’ve seen real jerk parents with kids who love those sports and stay with it and kids with great supportive parents drop out. In my experience the reasons that kids leave or stay is

1. Whether or not the kid likes the activity itself.
2. Does the kid have friends/ get along with their teammates
3. Does that sport have cachet with their social group

I think as parents and coaches we overestimate how much we affect the desires of the kids. My personal example is that my son had a great summer swim season a couple years ago. Beating kids who were year-round, swimmers. He just wanted to be on lacrosse team with his friends, even though he basically spent the whole summer sitting on the bench because he wasn’t really fast enough to make a starting spot. We made him finish out the swim season but he never was on swim team again. But 4 years later he’s still playing lacrosse. He just wanted to be with his friends and gain status in his group.

As the guy footing the bills, it’s frustrating to see my son trade. What was likely a pretty good swim career for a mediocre lacrosse career. But what are you gonna do?

+1

Same experience here with both of my kids. They want to play the sports their friends do, and care more about the social prestige/popularity of the sport. Each is now focusing on a sport that they aren’t really even physically suited for TBH- rather than the sports they are better at and work with their body types. It is annoying but really what can you do?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:70% of kids dropout of sports by the age of 13.


There’s an interesting article that describes why -

“ parents invest significant time and money in their kids to train with teams and buy their uniforms. They expect “results." They drive them all over to year-round sports, sometimes more than one during the same season. Oftentimes, perhaps unintentionally, they drive them out of sports entirely.

For a lot of kids, it comes down to the fact that sports become less fun and more about the concept of what success is from more of an adult’s eyes than a child’s eyes,” Moffatt says. "Kids want to stay active, play and have fun with their friends, and winning and losing is something that they care less about.”

About 70 % of kids drop out of organized sports by age 13 and the so-called “professionalization of youth sports” can’t be understated as a significant factor why, according to a new report released Monday by the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).


“In addition, the pressure to succeed at a young age, as well as the perception that this is the most efficacious route to future athletic success, further leads to high volumes of training and loss of enjoyment in sport, both of which can contribute to widespread burnout and attrition among youth athletes.”


https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2024/01/22/70-of-kids-drop-out-of-youth-sports-by-13-new-aap-study-reveals-why/72310189007/

I’ve coached rec and had kids in rec and travel and I don’t think that kids stay or drop out of the sport has much to do with the parents. I’ve seen real jerk parents with kids who love those sports and stay with it and kids with great supportive parents drop out. In my experience the reasons that kids leave or stay is

1. Whether or not the kid likes the activity itself.
2. Does the kid have friends/ get along with their teammates
3. Does that sport have cachet with their social group

I think as parents and coaches we overestimate how much we affect the desires of the kids. My personal example is that my son had a great summer swim season a couple years ago. Beating kids who were year-round, swimmers. He just wanted to be on lacrosse team with his friends, even though he basically spent the whole summer sitting on the bench because he wasn’t really fast enough to make a starting spot. We made him finish out the swim season but he never was on swim team again. But 4 years later he’s still playing lacrosse. He just wanted to be with his friends and gain status in his group.

As the guy footing the bills, it’s frustrating to see my son trade. What was likely a pretty good swim career for a mediocre lacrosse career. But what are you gonna do?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:70% of kids dropout of sports by the age of 13.


There’s an interesting article that describes why -

“ parents invest significant time and money in their kids to train with teams and buy their uniforms. They expect “results." They drive them all over to year-round sports, sometimes more than one during the same season. Oftentimes, perhaps unintentionally, they drive them out of sports entirely.

For a lot of kids, it comes down to the fact that sports become less fun and more about the concept of what success is from more of an adult’s eyes than a child’s eyes,” Moffatt says. "Kids want to stay active, play and have fun with their friends, and winning and losing is something that they care less about.”

About 70 % of kids drop out of organized sports by age 13 and the so-called “professionalization of youth sports” can’t be understated as a significant factor why, according to a new report released Monday by the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).


“In addition, the pressure to succeed at a young age, as well as the perception that this is the most efficacious route to future athletic success, further leads to high volumes of training and loss of enjoyment in sport, both of which can contribute to widespread burnout and attrition among youth athletes.”


https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2024/01/22/70-of-kids-drop-out-of-youth-sports-by-13-new-aap-study-reveals-why/72310189007/

I’ve coached rec and had kids in rec and travel and I don’t think that kids stay or drop out of the sport has much to do with the parents. I’ve seen real jerk parents with kids who love those sports and stay with it and kids with great supportive parents drop out. In my experience the reasons that kids leave or stay is

1. Whether or not the kid likes the activity itself.
2. Does the kid have friends/ get along with their teammates
3. Does that sport have cachet with their social group

I think as parents and coaches we overestimate how much we affect the desires of the kids. My personal example is that my son had a great summer swim season a couple years ago. Beating kids who were year-round, swimmers. He just wanted to be on lacrosse team with his friends, even though he basically spent the whole summer sitting on the bench because he wasn’t really fast enough to make a starting spot. We made him finish out the swim season but he never was on swim team again. But 4 years later he’s still playing lacrosse. He just wanted to be with his friends and gain status in his group.

As the guy footing the bills, it’s frustrating to see my son trade. What was likely a pretty good swim career for a mediocre lacrosse career. But what are you gonna do?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:70% of kids dropout of sports by the age of 13.


There’s an interesting article that describes why -

“ parents invest significant time and money in their kids to train with teams and buy their uniforms. They expect “results." They drive them all over to year-round sports, sometimes more than one during the same season. Oftentimes, perhaps unintentionally, they drive them out of sports entirely.

For a lot of kids, it comes down to the fact that sports become less fun and more about the concept of what success is from more of an adult’s eyes than a child’s eyes,” Moffatt says. "Kids want to stay active, play and have fun with their friends, and winning and losing is something that they care less about.”

About 70 % of kids drop out of organized sports by age 13 and the so-called “professionalization of youth sports” can’t be understated as a significant factor why, according to a new report released Monday by the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).


“In addition, the pressure to succeed at a young age, as well as the perception that this is the most efficacious route to future athletic success, further leads to high volumes of training and loss of enjoyment in sport, both of which can contribute to widespread burnout and attrition among youth athletes.”


https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2024/01/22/70-of-kids-drop-out-of-youth-sports-by-13-new-aap-study-reveals-why/72310189007/

Every time I read these articles I just think to myself: are the authors totally hallucinating and do they not know what high school is like these days? The reason the kids quit at that age is because we make it so difficult to make the high school sports teams at that age and then they choose do other extracurriculars at school if they can’t make the team.

Anonymous wrote:Kids are dropping out at a time that they should start being serious. Instead too much too soon leads to failure too many times.

Elementary school should be casual play, learning the basics, play with friends or family.

Anonymous wrote:70% of kids dropout of sports by the age of 13.


There’s an interesting article that describes why -

“ parents invest significant time and money in their kids to train with teams and buy their uniforms. They expect “results." They drive them all over to year-round sports, sometimes more than one during the same season. Oftentimes, perhaps unintentionally, they drive them out of sports entirely.

For a lot of kids, it comes down to the fact that sports become less fun and more about the concept of what success is from more of an adult’s eyes than a child’s eyes,” Moffatt says. "Kids want to stay active, play and have fun with their friends, and winning and losing is something that they care less about.”

About 70 % of kids drop out of organized sports by age 13 and the so-called “professionalization of youth sports” can’t be understated as a significant factor why, according to a new report released Monday by the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).


“In addition, the pressure to succeed at a young age, as well as the perception that this is the most efficacious route to future athletic success, further leads to high volumes of training and loss of enjoyment in sport, both of which can contribute to widespread burnout and attrition among youth athletes.”


https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2024/01/22/70-of-kids-drop-out-of-youth-sports-by-13-new-aap-study-reveals-why/72310189007/

Anonymous wrote:70% of kids dropout of sports by the age of 13.


There’s an interesting article that describes why -

“ parents invest significant time and money in their kids to train with teams and buy their uniforms. They expect “results." They drive them all over to year-round sports, sometimes more than one during the same season. Oftentimes, perhaps unintentionally, they drive them out of sports entirely.

For a lot of kids, it comes down to the fact that sports become less fun and more about the concept of what success is from more of an adult’s eyes than a child’s eyes,” Moffatt says. "Kids want to stay active, play and have fun with their friends, and winning and losing is something that they care less about.”

About 70 % of kids drop out of organized sports by age 13 and the so-called “professionalization of youth sports” can’t be understated as a significant factor why, according to a new report released Monday by the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).


“In addition, the pressure to succeed at a young age, as well as the perception that this is the most efficacious route to future athletic success, further leads to high volumes of training and loss of enjoyment in sport, both of which can contribute to widespread burnout and attrition among youth athletes.”


https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2024/01/22/70-of-kids-drop-out-of-youth-sports-by-13-new-aap-study-reveals-why/72310189007/

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. As a rec parent, my goal with DD is just for her to learn some basics of the game and get some exercise. I would rather she be focused on academics, not athletics. Signed- Nerd who outearns all the jocks from my high school.

Nobody wants to be a nasty troll like you.

Uh no, there are a great many comments in this thread that are nasty and insulting to Rec families.

I'm a rec-only parent and didn't feel insulted by this thread.

I'm a former rec parent who had to quit because the girls softball coach screams at the girls "What the EFF is wrong with you?" When they make mistakes and he's allowed to coach even though we complained. I don't want to be part of that organization and I don't care if the people at the heart of it who refuse to clean house feel "insulted".

Sheesh. I hope this isn't the softball league I volunteer with.

It's hard to be a rec league because you're stuck with only the volunteers you get/people whose arm you can twist (like the poster upthread who was an "assistant" coach and ended up taking over the team). That means a jerk who steps up may get to coach even though everyone in the organization knows he's a jerk. Cleaning house isn't as easy as you might think. I can think of like 3 coaches off the top of my head our league would love to get rid of - nothing as terrible as your story but lots of little things - and it's just not been possible.

So the other families will leave. I would be shocked if our softball league had enough teams this year. Between foul mouthed dad and aggressive mean parents it was a toxic environment and people don't want to play it in anymore. The parents sucked the fun right out of it.

I’ve had three kids in various rec leagues over the years and NEVER had this experience. We have moved on to club/travel but have nothing but great memories of our years in those sports. Caring coaches, kind parents.

Don’t give up - this could very well have just been one bad season and not a reflection of the rec program in your area or even the rec softball program, generally.

We've been in a lot of rec orgs. This was just one of them, but we will not play in this one anymore. My kids are aging out of rec anyway. But it's sad about softball. Now my daughter just won't play anymore b/c she was just there for the social reasons and to be with friends. But, I offered this up as a reason people don't play rec and seek out clubs or travel. It's not that they are hyper competitive or want to overtrain their kids, sometimes (not always) it's because the rec offering is really lacking in a lot of areas: coaching, development, and a healthy environment.

This makes sense, but realistically if one parent - as someone who is willing to put in work in a rec organization but is only one person - want to fix it how would they? One person can't make parents volunteer. One person can't make coaches be good (a coach clinic might help a bit, but how much can you do?). One person can't make people be nice. Setting a culture takes at a minimum an entire in-group of people, right?

And you are talking simultaneously about aggresive mean parents and your DD being with friends - were the friends parented by better parents? I understand there's a tipping point, but doesn't basically every league have a bad parent or two or ten?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. As a rec parent, my goal with DD is just for her to learn some basics of the game and get some exercise. I would rather she be focused on academics, not athletics. Signed- Nerd who outearns all the jocks from my high school.

Nobody wants to be a nasty troll like you.

Uh no, there are a great many comments in this thread that are nasty and insulting to Rec families.

I'm a rec-only parent and didn't feel insulted by this thread.

I'm a former rec parent who had to quit because the girls softball coach screams at the girls "What the EFF is wrong with you?" When they make mistakes and he's allowed to coach even though we complained. I don't want to be part of that organization and I don't care if the people at the heart of it who refuse to clean house feel "insulted".

Sheesh. I hope this isn't the softball league I volunteer with.

It's hard to be a rec league because you're stuck with only the volunteers you get/people whose arm you can twist (like the poster upthread who was an "assistant" coach and ended up taking over the team). That means a jerk who steps up may get to coach even though everyone in the organization knows he's a jerk. Cleaning house isn't as easy as you might think. I can think of like 3 coaches off the top of my head our league would love to get rid of - nothing as terrible as your story but lots of little things - and it's just not been possible.

So the other families will leave. I would be shocked if our softball league had enough teams this year. Between foul mouthed dad and aggressive mean parents it was a toxic environment and people don't want to play it in anymore. The parents sucked the fun right out of it.

I’ve had three kids in various rec leagues over the years and NEVER had this experience. We have moved on to club/travel but have nothing but great memories of our years in those sports. Caring coaches, kind parents.

Don’t give up - this could very well have just been one bad season and not a reflection of the rec program in your area or even the rec softball program, generally.

We've been in a lot of rec orgs. This was just one of them, but we will not play in this one anymore. My kids are aging out of rec anyway. But it's sad about softball. Now my daughter just won't play anymore b/c she was just there for the social reasons and to be with friends. But, I offered this up as a reason people don't play rec and seek out clubs or travel. It's not that they are hyper competitive or want to overtrain their kids, sometimes (not always) it's because the rec offering is really lacking in a lot of areas: coaching, development, and a healthy environment.