Anonymous
12/31/2023 11:37
Subject: Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I once had a date with a divorced woman who was 38 and man she was DTF right there and then after the first date. I donât sleep with any date until a month into the relationship. So we had our first date, everything was going well, she had a few drinks( I donât drink) and we were just talking and I told her I am not into hooking up right away and her response was super DTF lol. She said âI guess I shaved for nothing tonightâ and giggled. Yeah I knew she wasnât for me. Not all men are DTF.
Yeah, I would say that it is very situational. You'd have to be very sure that you aren't hooking up with "crazy".
The other aspect of this is STDs. How do you assess that within the first date or two?
Even in my 20s, I would never initially sleep with a woman unless I used a condom. Not just STDs, but really did not want to pay 18 years of child support.
During college our frat had a "rawdogging randoms" thing. It was mostly a joke but some guys took the meme seriously. We all got the clap at some point, mostly because we were banging the same sluts that took turns on us. Few of my bros actually knocked up some girls. It was fun but also really stupid.
So disgusting đ¤Ž
Anonymous
12/31/2023 11:15
Subject: Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I once had a date with a divorced woman who was 38 and man she was DTF right there and then after the first date. I donât sleep with any date until a month into the relationship. So we had our first date, everything was going well, she had a few drinks( I donât drink) and we were just talking and I told her I am not into hooking up right away and her response was super DTF lol. She said âI guess I shaved for nothing tonightâ and giggled. Yeah I knew she wasnât for me. Not all men are DTF.
Yeah, I would say that it is very situational. You'd have to be very sure that you aren't hooking up with "crazy".
The other aspect of this is STDs. How do you assess that within the first date or two?
Even in my 20s, I would never initially sleep with a woman unless I used a condom. Not just STDs, but really did not want to pay 18 years of child support.
During college our frat had a "rawdogging randoms" thing. It was mostly a joke but some guys took the meme seriously. We all got the clap at some point, mostly because we were banging the same sluts that took turns on us. Few of my bros actually knocked up some girls. It was fun but also really stupid.
Anonymous
12/31/2023 11:07
Subject: Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I once had a date with a divorced woman who was 38 and man she was DTF right there and then after the first date. I donât sleep with any date until a month into the relationship. So we had our first date, everything was going well, she had a few drinks( I donât drink) and we were just talking and I told her I am not into hooking up right away and her response was super DTF lol. She said âI guess I shaved for nothing tonightâ and giggled. Yeah I knew she wasnât for me. Not all men are DTF.
Yeah, I would say that it is very situational. You'd have to be very sure that you aren't hooking up with "crazy".
The other aspect of this is STDs. How do you assess that within the first date or two?
Even in my 20s, I would never initially sleep with a woman unless I used a condom. Not just STDs, but really did not want to pay 18 years of child support.
All men are nowadays offering oral to women very first few dates, and heâs unprotected during it. Condoms also donât protect entirely against skin to skin STDs like herpes
Anonymous
12/31/2023 09:34
Subject: Why dating became so hard đ
OP, dating has always been difficult. It's a numbers game. Don't you remember in college the fumbling around and trying to pick up on the other person's feelings? Plus keeping your expectations realistic? To some degree, we are still that same individual wrapped in an older person.
Anonymous
12/31/2023 09:12
Subject: Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I once had a date with a divorced woman who was 38 and man she was DTF right there and then after the first date. I donât sleep with any date until a month into the relationship. So we had our first date, everything was going well, she had a few drinks( I donât drink) and we were just talking and I told her I am not into hooking up right away and her response was super DTF lol. She said âI guess I shaved for nothing tonightâ and giggled. Yeah I knew she wasnât for me. Not all men are DTF.
Yeah, I would say that it is very situational. You'd have to be very sure that you aren't hooking up with "crazy".
The other aspect of this is STDs. How do you assess that within the first date or two?
Even in my 20s, I would never initially sleep with a woman unless I used a condom. Not just STDs, but really did not want to pay 18 years of child support.
Anonymous
12/30/2023 23:29
Subject: Re:Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If i like a man and see him at least 3 times, I try to create a comfortable setting to have a make-out session (without sex but certainly with me undressing to nice lingerie). It's important for me to see if he's turning me on, and other way around, before continue seeing each other. Why waste everyone's time?
Sex is usually a month in, usually 6-7 dates and after I verified he's single, doesn't have criminal history, know where he works, and after I visited his home (again ,to verify he lives alone and is transparent).
Not sure how a woman can even have sex safely with anyone on date 1-2
Iâm sorry but if you strip down to nice lingerie the expectation will be very high that sex is in the offing. You can certainly âjust say noâ but he will be surprised. Iâm all for a heavy kissing session and maybe some groping but Iâm not stripping down to my undies as part of it. I save that for the main event.
I would want to see a man stripped down to briefs before I decide on sex. Sometimes I invite dates for a gym workout with swimming together for that specific purpose. Seeing him in trunks either stimulates or eliminates my desire.
Just swap dick pics with him and skip the gym. That way you donât need to even meet him.
Thanks for the joke. Itâs not about his dick for me (as long as itâs not micro). Itâs about his whole body and personality - how playful, sharp, sexy he is in some situations like a joint workout. His body may not necessarily be perfect but I would still find him sexy like a caveman.
Anonymous
12/30/2023 18:07
Subject: Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:The worst STD's have no outward symptoms. Specifically, Hepatitis B, C, and HIV. HPV also.
Some day the Apple Watch will be able to read all STDs so on the first date you just rub the watches together and see if you are good to go.
Anonymous
12/30/2023 18:04
Subject: Re:Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If i like a man and see him at least 3 times, I try to create a comfortable setting to have a make-out session (without sex but certainly with me undressing to nice lingerie). It's important for me to see if he's turning me on, and other way around, before continue seeing each other. Why waste everyone's time?
Sex is usually a month in, usually 6-7 dates and after I verified he's single, doesn't have criminal history, know where he works, and after I visited his home (again ,to verify he lives alone and is transparent).
Not sure how a woman can even have sex safely with anyone on date 1-2
Iâm sorry but if you strip down to nice lingerie the expectation will be very high that sex is in the offing. You can certainly âjust say noâ but he will be surprised. Iâm all for a heavy kissing session and maybe some groping but Iâm not stripping down to my undies as part of it. I save that for the main event.
I would want to see a man stripped down to briefs before I decide on sex. Sometimes I invite dates for a gym workout with swimming together for that specific purpose. Seeing him in trunks either stimulates or eliminates my desire.
Just swap dick pics with him and skip the gym. That way you donât need to even meet him.
Anonymous
12/30/2023 17:40
Subject: Why dating became so hard đ
The worst STD's have no outward symptoms. Specifically, Hepatitis B, C, and HIV. HPV also.
Anonymous
12/30/2023 17:40
Subject: Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I once had a date with a divorced woman who was 38 and man she was DTF right there and then after the first date. I donât sleep with any date until a month into the relationship. So we had our first date, everything was going well, she had a few drinks( I donât drink) and we were just talking and I told her I am not into hooking up right away and her response was super DTF lol. She said âI guess I shaved for nothing tonightâ and giggled. Yeah I knew she wasnât for me. Not all men are DTF.
Yeah, I would say that it is very situational. You'd have to be very sure that you aren't hooking up with "crazy".
The other aspect of this is STDs. How do you assess that within the first date or two?
Of course there is no way to evaluate for STD. As a woman I tell after couple weeks of seeing each other regularly (2-3 times a week, texts/calls every day, nice combos) that I have my test available. Men who want sex âgetâ this and ask for the list of items I want to see
*nice convos
Anonymous
12/30/2023 17:35
Subject: Why dating became so hard đ
If you don't want to have sex with a guy right away, please don't.
Wait until you are ready.
This is a collective action problem. If more women waited, men would have to be more ok with waiting.
Wait until you are ready.
This is a collective action problem. If more women waited, men would have to be more ok with waiting.
Anonymous
12/30/2023 17:34
Subject: Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I once had a date with a divorced woman who was 38 and man she was DTF right there and then after the first date. I donât sleep with any date until a month into the relationship. So we had our first date, everything was going well, she had a few drinks( I donât drink) and we were just talking and I told her I am not into hooking up right away and her response was super DTF lol. She said âI guess I shaved for nothing tonightâ and giggled. Yeah I knew she wasnât for me. Not all men are DTF.
Yeah, I would say that it is very situational. You'd have to be very sure that you aren't hooking up with "crazy".
The other aspect of this is STDs. How do you assess that within the first date or two?
Of course there is no way to evaluate for STD. As a woman I tell after couple weeks of seeing each other regularly (2-3 times a week, texts/calls every day, nice combos) that I have my test available. Men who want sex âgetâ this and ask for the list of items I want to see
Anonymous
12/30/2023 17:31
Subject: Re:Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If i like a man and see him at least 3 times, I try to create a comfortable setting to have a make-out session (without sex but certainly with me undressing to nice lingerie). It's important for me to see if he's turning me on, and other way around, before continue seeing each other. Why waste everyone's time?
Sex is usually a month in, usually 6-7 dates and after I verified he's single, doesn't have criminal history, know where he works, and after I visited his home (again ,to verify he lives alone and is transparent).
Not sure how a woman can even have sex safely with anyone on date 1-2
Iâm sorry but if you strip down to nice lingerie the expectation will be very high that sex is in the offing. You can certainly âjust say noâ but he will be surprised. Iâm all for a heavy kissing session and maybe some groping but Iâm not stripping down to my undies as part of it. I save that for the main event.
I would want to see a man stripped down to briefs before I decide on sex. Sometimes I invite dates for a gym workout with swimming together for that specific purpose. Seeing him in trunks either stimulates or eliminates my desire.
Anonymous
12/30/2023 17:31
Subject: Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:I once had a date with a divorced woman who was 38 and man she was DTF right there and then after the first date. I donât sleep with any date until a month into the relationship. So we had our first date, everything was going well, she had a few drinks( I donât drink) and we were just talking and I told her I am not into hooking up right away and her response was super DTF lol. She said âI guess I shaved for nothing tonightâ and giggled. Yeah I knew she wasnât for me. Not all men are DTF.
Yeah, I would say that it is very situational. You'd have to be very sure that you aren't hooking up with "crazy".
The other aspect of this is STDs. How do you assess that within the first date or two?
Anonymous
12/30/2023 17:30
Subject: Re:Why dating became so hard đ
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You see the conflicting responses on here.
Some men saying if a woman doesnât have sex within the first few dates, then something is wrong with them. And they lose interest.
Some men saying if a woman does want to have sex right away, then somethingâs wrong with them. And they lose interest.
So the balanced approach seems to be for the woman to show sheâs interested in some ways.
As PP man suggested, I do offer to plan a date 4 or 5, might get tickets for an event etc when Iâm interested in him but undecided yet to which extent.
Not that I have a great deal of post divorce experience but when I reach the point when I have a real physical interest I just invite him over for dinner. Iâm a good cook too so that helps as does being in my own home.