Anonymous
08/17/2023 23:40
Subject: My Fiance told me yesterday that he wants me to move out
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Nobody has answered the REAL question here. OP has discovered he is a dismissive avoidant. Whatever shall she do?!?
I don't think it has anything to do with being dismissive avoidant... or sounds like he's cheating and met someone else.
She can rationalize it all she wants, but he's been gone for a while and she's just catching on.
Yep. This. OP, I think in your gut you know it's true. Happens to a lot of us.
Anonymous
08/17/2023 23:37
Subject: My Fiance told me yesterday that he wants me to move out
Anonymous wrote:Nobody has answered the REAL question here. OP has discovered he is a dismissive avoidant. Whatever shall she do?!?
I don't think it has anything to do with being dismissive avoidant... or sounds like he's cheating and met someone else.
She can rationalize it all she wants, but he's been gone for a while and she's just catching on.
Anonymous
08/17/2023 22:52
Subject: My Fiance told me yesterday that he wants me to move out
Anonymous wrote:This "Dismissive Avoidant" stuff is a lot of nonsense and doesn't matter either way because this man is done with you and the relationship. The way forward is to move on with your kids and your life.
Attachment is a well established issue your comment is what’s nonsense.
Anonymous
08/17/2023 17:48
Subject: My Fiance told me yesterday that he wants me to move out
OP, try to sell the house quickly. Take the proceeds and rent something in the kids' school district (ask the realtor if they can help you locate a place). Do not look back. Do not engage with this guy.
Just focus on the kids and moving forward.
I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this.
Just focus on the kids and moving forward.
I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this.
Anonymous
08/16/2023 23:00
Subject: My Fiance told me yesterday that he wants me to move out
He is manipulating you. First he tells you to move out and then when you refuse he gives you the silent treatment. Then when you approach him in a very calm way about his failure to pay his share of the bills, he tries the soft approach - crying on your shoulder and saying something that implies he doesn’t want the relationship to end so you’ll feel bad and give in to him.
This guy is a loser. Don’t waste time figuring out why. Consult a real estate attorney about selling the house and how to protect yourself to get your fair share.
This guy is a loser. Don’t waste time figuring out why. Consult a real estate attorney about selling the house and how to protect yourself to get your fair share.
Anonymous
08/15/2023 20:30
Subject: My Fiance told me yesterday that he wants me to move out
Sell the house and don't buy another one with someone until you're married!
Anonymous
08/15/2023 13:40
Subject: My Fiance told me yesterday that he wants me to move out
Why do you need to sell the house OP? Can't you both just continue to live in it as housemates if not romantic partners?
The house is a business deal. If it's a good house and fulfills your needs, why would you go to all the trouble of selling it just because the personal relationship is over?
Keep the same financial relationship and keep track of everything if he drops the ball as that can ultimately be added to your share of the equity.
It's plain silly to sell the house right now.
Time to suck it up and act like an adult. Your whole life doesn't have to fall to pieces just because your ex-boyfriend is emotionally unstable.
You have no guarantee that you would end up in a better living situation if you sold it anyway. You can't afford to anyway if you seriously can't scrape a few hundred together to get your car fixed. GET YOUR CAR FIXED.
The house is a business deal. If it's a good house and fulfills your needs, why would you go to all the trouble of selling it just because the personal relationship is over?
Keep the same financial relationship and keep track of everything if he drops the ball as that can ultimately be added to your share of the equity.
It's plain silly to sell the house right now.
Time to suck it up and act like an adult. Your whole life doesn't have to fall to pieces just because your ex-boyfriend is emotionally unstable.
You have no guarantee that you would end up in a better living situation if you sold it anyway. You can't afford to anyway if you seriously can't scrape a few hundred together to get your car fixed. GET YOUR CAR FIXED.
Anonymous
08/15/2023 05:39
Subject: My Fiance told me yesterday that he wants me to move out
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This sounds fake but you should be paying more when it’s you and your kids and you should be paying more. Sell the house and get your own place.
He has kids too right?
Yes. High school & young adult.
Anonymous
08/14/2023 22:11
Subject: My Fiance told me yesterday that he wants me to move out
Anonymous wrote:Nobody has answered the REAL question here. OP has discovered he is a dismissive avoidant. Whatever shall she do?!?
They should keep sock puppeting their OPs here on DCUM. Waste everyone’s time and sit back laughing!
Anonymous
08/14/2023 21:25
Subject: My Fiance told me yesterday that he wants me to move out
Anonymous wrote:This sounds fake but you should be paying more when it’s you and your kids and you should be paying more. Sell the house and get your own place.
He has kids too right?