Anonymous wrote:I haven't read this entirely but I wouldn't say this is 'super common amongst girls'.

My daughter and her freshman roommate did not do this. Nor did any of her friends at the colleges they went to.

Don't buy into what people say is a 'norm'.

If your DD is interested, give her a budget.

Same. After move in I asked DC if they’d like a rug for the center of the room and she was somehow embarrassed. This is not all college girls. There’s frequently a roommate who’s more organized, with more storage boxes and accessories, and that’s the one still in the dorm 5 hours after the rest of the floor managed to vacate.

Anonymous wrote:Sorry not buying this whole thing and perhaps a fake post. Kids today find/meet on facebook groups and then decide if they want to live together. It is not like the old days when you get a letter in snail mail with a phone number and even then I coordinated. [/b]Also the for kids who do not want to go that route the school has extensive surveys to help with comparability. [b]No longer the goth kid forced to
love with sorority type.

Not all schools. One kid found their own roommate. Second kid went random. There was no matching by the school involved. It truly was totally random.

The issue is not what op’s dd is willing to spend on decoration, she can spend nothing. It’s op’s open hostility towards the new roommate who only asked for a conversation, a conversation which is totally appropriate when one is sharing a room with a stranger.

Anonymous wrote:Sorry not buying this whole thing and perhaps a fake post. Kids today find/meet on facebook groups and then decide if they want to live together. It is not like the old days when you get a letter in snail mail with a phone number and even then I coordinated. Also the for kids who do not want to go that route the school has extensive surveys to help with comparability. No longer the goth kid forced to
love with sorority type.

Many schools still do random assignments

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t read the full thread. Just came on to say we did this 30 years ago. I neither roommate or I came from wealthy families.

And 30 years ago I showed up on campus on day 1 and met my roommate. I brought my stuff and she brought hers. We never tried to coordinate. We were not friends and after the first year didn't see each other again.

I haven't read this entirely but I wouldn't say this is 'super common amongst girls'.

My daughter and her freshman roommate did not do this. Nor did any of her friends at the colleges they went to.

Don't buy into what people say is a 'norm'.

If your DD is interested, give her a budget.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pretty common for girls and honestly... how much could this cost? Cheap headboard, some posters, some knick knacks from target...

My neighbor said she spent over $1000 decorating her DD's dorm room last year. That's a lot of money IMO.

Stop providing examples that are way out of the norm.
DP

I don't think they are. I'm looking at photos of dorm rooms at the college my son will start this fall. They rarely show boy's rooms and the girl's rooms are full of decoration (rugs, lamps, photo collages, strings of lights, fancy bed sets with tons of pillows, lots of storage under the lofted beds, bedside tables, organizers in the closets for shoes/clothes, bean bag chairs, etc. That could easily run $1000.

I didn’t read the full thread. Just came on to say we did this 30 years ago. I neither roommate or I came from wealthy families.

Sorry not buying this whole thing and perhaps a fake post. Kids today find/meet on facebook groups and then decide if they want to live together. It is not like the old days when you get a letter in snail mail with a phone number and even then I coordinated. Also the for kids who do not want to go that route the school has extensive surveys to help with comparability. No longer the goth kid forced to
love with sorority type.

Anonymous wrote:meaning I agree that the girl is not a control freak

I would have felt control freak vibes if my roommate had done this before I went to off college — but that was before social media. My first roommate was tough to live with, so I changed roommates for the second semester. Good thing I hadn’t wasted any effort or money on coordinating with a stranger before I knew if I could actually live with her.

Pro-tip for parents with kids who are going to want to decorate (many of them do because of social media), tell them to ask for $$ for winter holidays/birthdays/graduation during senior year of hs and tell them this is the $ they get to spend on decorating.

I think both my kids spent in the $500-$600 range. This # is fairly easy to get to if you are talking a refrigerator, new bedding set, foam topper, bed risers, under bed storage, new rug, fairy lights, lamp, fan, pillows. When folks are talking $1000 plus they likely are adding in matching headboards and window treatments (yes, this can be a thing).

meaning I agree that the girl is not a control freak

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh. Giving control freak vibes, privately. To your DD, try to be enrhusiastic and see this as an opportunity for both self expression and get to know roomate better before school starts.

This is not control freak vibes. Super common with girls. You’re reading too much into it and just looking for problems.

I actually feel for the other girl. She is trying to be enthusiastic and you are not okay with this? I can’t tell if this is you or your kid. I definitely worked with my roommate to make things nice and this was thirty years back. My dad is a carpenter and he made things for our room. Our room was beautiful and it wasn’t expensive. My roommate was wealthy fyi but I was not and it worked.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pretty common for girls and honestly... how much could this cost? Cheap headboard, some posters, some knick knacks from target...

My neighbor said she spent over $1000 decorating her DD's dorm room last year. That's a lot of money IMO.

And we spent a couple hundred (maybe $400-500) for each of my girls. Including fridge, microwave, storage and decor.

It doesn't have to be expensive. We could have done it even cheaper but I was ok with them spending that.

BTW neither had a headboard-they didn't want one.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pretty common for girls and honestly... how much could this cost? Cheap headboard, some posters, some knick knacks from target...

My neighbor said she spent over $1000 decorating her DD's dorm room last year. That's a lot of money IMO.

Stop providing examples that are way out of the norm.
DP