Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^and I wouldn’t think anything of them going out at 10pm. It wouldn’t occur to me they would ding dong ditch.

The the PP. I would. What would they possibly be up to at 10 pm outside that isn’t trouble? I wouldn’t allow it. If they want to hang out outside at 10pm, they can stay on the patio and around the yard. Not roam around the neighborhood

OP here. I guess in my mind walking to the park (basically a small little pocket park) half a block a way at 10 pm is not roaming. Again, it is on me for thinking they would just do that and I should have kept a closer watch. I will be honest and say that I tend to approach things like this from a POV of letting kids feel some sense of freedom and fun rather than one of constant suspicion. These kids didn't warrant concern in that way. That is on me, yes. Honestly, I was just glad they were not cooped up in his room gaming. Now I know better.

I'm in my 50s and was, as were all my friends, free range kids. My parents had no idea where I was during the day. Yet, the rule for us and all the kids I hung out with were that we had to be home by dark. In the summer time where I grew up, that was about 9PM. Just why do you think that was? Even in the 'good old days', our parents knew nothing good came of young teens being out after dark. I can't believe your naiveté and poor judgment.

80s kid. We always had to be home when the street lights came on.

This has zero to do with free range parenting.

How did you hunt for nightcrawlers before dark? How did you catch lightning bugs before dark?

Also, not sure it really matters how we grew up—the culture is very different now. There is a perception that the world is unsafe, and there are a lot of guns out there.

Given the time of night, I would also be on the fence about contacting the other parents immediately. But I would absolutely be the ones to tell them right away in the AM. You made a bad decision as a parent and as a caregiver, and you need to acknowledge what happened for the sake of integrity. The other parents’ reactions may be as varied as you see here, but it’s up to you to take the heat for your part in it and not leave that news for their child to deliver.

Kids will get their own consequences from their parents and I imagine you may experience some too.

Did they smoke pot too?

OP, I really can’t believe you thought this was ok.

Even if they just stayed at the park. Parks and playgrounds after dark turn into spots for teens and young adults to smoke, do drugs, even have sex.

My 8th grader and his friends did this. My husband went out and caught them, not the police. We chewed the entire group out.

I also let them know how stupid they are since everybody in our neighborhood has a Ring doorbell and can see who it was.

On a side note, we loved doing this growing up in the 80s. Prank calls too were hilarious (long before caller ID). My brother and his friends also would take our remote and go in the back of homes with sliding glass doors and change the channels when people were watching. They never knew what was going on and why their TV was acting up.

But, police are right, people are on edge, crazy and packing these days.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is so freaking funny. But the comments are NOT it. They were knocking on doors and running away laughing. Big freaking deal. There are 8th graders having sex, drinking, and smoking weed.

We have had it done to us before and I laugh and think of when we did it as kids. If they were smarter, they would get a Fios or Comcast remote control and start changing people's channels when they are watching tv. Take it to the next level. LOL

You must be high yourself 😂

Ha ha ha she's a lunatic

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^and I wouldn’t think anything of them going out at 10pm. It wouldn’t occur to me they would ding dong ditch.

The the PP. I would. What would they possibly be up to at 10 pm outside that isn’t trouble? I wouldn’t allow it. If they want to hang out outside at 10pm, they can stay on the patio and around the yard. Not roam around the neighborhood

OP here. I guess in my mind walking to the park (basically a small little pocket park) half a block a way at 10 pm is not roaming. Again, it is on me for thinking they would just do that and I should have kept a closer watch. I will be honest and say that I tend to approach things like this from a POV of letting kids feel some sense of freedom and fun rather than one of constant suspicion. These kids didn't warrant concern in that way. That is on me, yes. Honestly, I was just glad they were not cooped up in his room gaming. Now I know better.

I'm in my 50s and was, as were all my friends, free range kids. My parents had no idea where I was during the day. Yet, the rule for us and all the kids I hung out with were that we had to be home by dark. In the summer time where I grew up, that was about 9PM. Just why do you think that was? Even in the 'good old days', our parents knew nothing good came of young teens being out after dark. I can't believe your naiveté and poor judgment.

80s kid. We always had to be home when the street lights came on.

This has zero to do with free range parenting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The number of prudes on this post is astonishing.

Yes, good parenting is so prudish.

+1. Sorry but the “boys will be boys” attitude doesn’t fly for my sons. I’m raising them to be respectful of the neighbors, not to bother them at 10 pm at night for no reason other than a laugh.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. I went to bed with no responses and now this.

Op here obviously.

I agree that the cops arriving with them at my house was the best outcome in terms of teaching them a lesson. They also needed to hear from them the danger of what they were doing at 10 pm at night. There are definitely people in this community who would meet this incident by bringing a gun to the door if not worse. Most of the kids were white but one friend is black and yes my heart was in my throat thinking about it. He is the one most concerned about wanting to tell his mom himself. I can imagine.

Yes I knew they went to the park and I was ok with it. These kids are 13. It's safe. It is on me that I underestimated their poor decision-making skills.

I will definitely let the parents know after the kids have a chance to speak to them. If I had called them all and sent them home they would have been more upset at me than their kids at that point. The cops were not mad, they were mainly concerned for the kids' safety. Which is crazy but totally realistic.

No, I am pretty easy going about letting kids be out & about, but 10pm is not safe. If one of the parents was nearby in the car playing on their phone, fine.

This board is so weird. If you go with your kid to drop them off at college, you’re accused of being a helicopter parent, but you’re also a terrible parent if you let teens go out by themselves after dark. They’re going to be driving in two years and on their own in four short years. A group of teens going to a suburban park within walking distance of your house is not inherently unsafe. It does present the possibility that they’ll get in trouble, but, unless you’re going to keep your teens locked in the house until they head off to college (by themselves, according to DCUM) they’ve got to start experiencing some independence somewhere. They’ve learned a lesson, and it’s actually quite good that they did so without permanent consequences. My Mom taught HS, and her view was that there is something wrong with kids who never get into trouble (although I think DC is full of people who never got into trouble as kids). If this is the worst thing they do as teens, you’ll be lucky.

OP can make that call for her own kids, but for her to let the group of kids out that late at night when the parents thought they were at her home for a sleepover isn’t the same thing.

Anonymous wrote:The number of prudes on this post is astonishing.

Yes, good parenting is so prudish.

I get that it’s kids having fun, but growing up I was independent but a house rule was if you get put in jail parents will leave you in there for a couple days to learn a lesson. Same should apply to the police bringing you home, needs to be consequences to learn the lesson. I’m all for independence but you have to teach it and not just let bad behavior slide because that only leads to more poor decision making.

The number of prudes on this post is astonishing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^and I wouldn’t think anything of them going out at 10pm. It wouldn’t occur to me they would ding dong ditch.

The the PP. I would. What would they possibly be up to at 10 pm outside that isn’t trouble? I wouldn’t allow it. If they want to hang out outside at 10pm, they can stay on the patio and around the yard. Not roam around the neighborhood

OP here. I guess in my mind walking to the park (basically a small little pocket park) half a block a way at 10 pm is not roaming. Again, it is on me for thinking they would just do that and I should have kept a closer watch. I will be honest and say that I tend to approach things like this from a POV of letting kids feel some sense of freedom and fun rather than one of constant suspicion. These kids didn't warrant concern in that way. That is on me, yes. Honestly, I was just glad they were not cooped up in his room gaming. Now I know better.

I'm in my 50s and was, as were all my friends, free range kids. My parents had no idea where I was during the day. Yet, the rule for us and all the kids I hung out with were that we had to be home by dark. In the summer time where I grew up, that was about 9PM. Just why do you think that was? Even in the 'good old days', our parents knew nothing good came of young teens being out after dark. I can't believe your naiveté and poor judgment.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. I went to bed with no responses and now this.

Op here obviously.

I agree that the cops arriving with them at my house was the best outcome in terms of teaching them a lesson. They also needed to hear from them the danger of what they were doing at 10 pm at night. There are definitely people in this community who would meet this incident by bringing a gun to the door if not worse. Most of the kids were white but one friend is black and yes my heart was in my throat thinking about it. He is the one most concerned about wanting to tell his mom himself. I can imagine.

Yes I knew they went to the park and I was ok with it. These kids are 13. It's safe. It is on me that I underestimated their poor decision-making skills.

I will definitely let the parents know after the kids have a chance to speak to them. If I had called them all and sent them home they would have been more upset at me than their kids at that point. The cops were not mad, they were mainly concerned for the kids' safety. Which is crazy but totally realistic.

No, I am pretty easy going about letting kids be out & about, but 10pm is not safe. If one of the parents was nearby in the car playing on their phone, fine.

This board is so weird. If you go with your kid to drop them off at college, you’re accused of being a helicopter parent, but you’re also a terrible parent if you let teens go out by themselves after dark. They’re going to be driving in two years and on their own in four short years. A group of teens going to a suburban park within walking distance of your house is not inherently unsafe. It does present the possibility that they’ll get in trouble, but, unless you’re going to keep your teens locked in the house until they head off to college (by themselves, according to DCUM) they’ve got to start experiencing some independence somewhere. They’ve learned a lesson, and it’s actually quite good that they did so without permanent consequences. My Mom taught HS, and her view was that there is something wrong with kids who never get into trouble (although I think DC is full of people who never got into trouble as kids). If this is the worst thing they do as teens, you’ll be lucky.

Anonymous wrote:To all the parents thinking a group of teenagers playing Ding Dong Ditch is a harmless prank, aside from the gun issue do you not realize the behavior escalates?

Earlier this month in my neighborhood, a ding dong ditched escalated his behavior And threw all the garbage from someone’s yard (weeds and what not) onto the front porch.

In a different neighborhood, a group of boys killed a goose.

I have no problem with whoever called the boys for playing ding dong ditch. Scare them straight before their behavior gets worse.

But this isn’t what happened. The boys weren’t vandalizing property, stealing anything, or doing anything illegal. It isn’t a crime to ring a doorbell. Yes this is bad behavior and can scare people or escalate. Yes they shouldn’t do it. The police bringing them home is irrelevant since they weren’t doing illegal activity, there is no charge. It would be the same if the neighbor called OP or walked the boys back to her house. Yes OP was stupid to let them go to “the park” alone at 10, yes they were wrong to be doing that, yes the parents should be told at pickup.
But I don’t think this warrants midnight phone calls and immediate pick ups