Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is a sad confirmation of Heard’s op-Ed, and proof that we have a long way to go as a society when it comes to addressing domestic abuse.

Agree, we DO have a long way to go when it comes to addressing domestic abuse. Amber Heard is still the abuser here.

Anonymous wrote:This thread is a sad confirmation of Heard’s op-Ed, and proof that we have a long way to go as a society when it comes to addressing domestic abuse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who have not been in an abusive situation really don’t understand how it works. When I was with my emotionally abusive boyfriend, I felt crazy. I lost my temper all the time, screamed, yelled, etc. That was not my personality before or since. But I felt so powerless and undermined by his constant gaslighting that I started to lose my grip on reality. So when I heard testimony from AH that she pushed Depp or screamed at him, that was familiar to me. She was much younger than him and she was living on the hellscape alternative reality that is life with an abuser. The texts Depp sent about her were absolutely chilling in their misogyny, and it’s the language of abuse that I immediately recognized. I couldn’t even listen to any more after that. The fact that he has so manipulated the public is extremely depressing to me. He is a substance abuser, yes, and also an abuser.

I am very sorry this happened to you but it isn’t what happened to Amber Heard. You can try to make it but it just isn’t the case. Much of her stories are fabricated so that people like you say “that’s exactly me” but I think we can all twist things around to tell the narrative we want. Watch the trial, not just snippets of it, try to remove your own experience and you’ll see it isn’t black or white.

Anonymous wrote:People who have not been in an abusive situation really don’t understand how it works. When I was with my emotionally abusive boyfriend, I felt crazy. I lost my temper all the time, screamed, yelled, etc. That was not my personality before or since. But I felt so powerless and undermined by his constant gaslighting that I started to lose my grip on reality. So when I heard testimony from AH that she pushed Depp or screamed at him, that was familiar to me. She was much younger than him and she was living on the hellscape alternative reality that is life with an abuser. The texts Depp sent about her were absolutely chilling in their misogyny, and it’s the language of abuse that I immediately recognized. I couldn’t even listen to any more after that. The fact that he has so manipulated the public is extremely depressing to me. He is a substance abuser, yes, and also an abuser.

Anonymous wrote:People who have not been in an abusive situation really don’t understand how it works. When I was with my emotionally abusive boyfriend, I felt crazy. I lost my temper all the time, screamed, yelled, etc. That was not my personality before or since. But I felt so powerless and undermined by his constant gaslighting that I started to lose my grip on reality. So when I heard testimony from AH that she pushed Depp or screamed at him, that was familiar to me. She was much younger than him and she was living on the hellscape alternative reality that is life with an abuser. The texts Depp sent about her were absolutely chilling in their misogyny, and it’s the language of abuse that I immediately recognized. I couldn’t even listen to any more after that. The fact that he has so manipulated the public is extremely depressing to me. He is a substance abuser, yes, and also an abuser.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who have not been in an abusive situation really don’t understand how it works. When I was with my emotionally abusive boyfriend, I felt crazy. I lost my temper all the time, screamed, yelled, etc. That was not my personality before or since. But I felt so powerless and undermined by his constant gaslighting that I started to lose my grip on reality. So when I heard testimony from AH that she pushed Depp or screamed at him, that was familiar to me. She was much younger than him and she was living on the hellscape alternative reality that is life with an abuser. The texts Depp sent about her were absolutely chilling in their misogyny, and it’s the language of abuse that I immediately recognized. I couldn’t even listen to any more after that. The fact that he has so manipulated the public is extremely depressing to me. He is a substance abuser, yes, and also an abuser.

OR it could be that Amber was the abuser and it brought out the worst in JD. Women can also inflict horrific emotional and verbal abuse. JD has had years of relationships with multiple other women and not one has said a peep about him being an abuser - quite the opposite in fact. I'm sorry this happened to you. I can imagine how triggering listening to or engaging with this trial would be.

Anonymous wrote:People who have not been in an abusive situation really don’t understand how it works. When I was with my emotionally abusive boyfriend, I felt crazy. I lost my temper all the time, screamed, yelled, etc. That was not my personality before or since. But I felt so powerless and undermined by his constant gaslighting that I started to lose my grip on reality. So when I heard testimony from AH that she pushed Depp or screamed at him, that was familiar to me. She was much younger than him and she was living on the hellscape alternative reality that is life with an abuser. The texts Depp sent about her were absolutely chilling in their misogyny, and it’s the language of abuse that I immediately recognized. I couldn’t even listen to any more after that. The fact that he has so manipulated the public is extremely depressing to me. He is a substance abuser, yes, and also an abuser.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One of the jurors admitted that they thought they both abused each other.

Ok fine, no one said she was perfect. However, if he abused her, then she did not defame him by saying she was a victim of domestic abuse. How do people not get this?

Perhaps, but did she not also accuse Depp of raping her with a bottle in the op-Ed? I don’t think anyone has said they believe that allegation, which was also apart of the civil suit.

his name is not even in the Op Ed and there are no details... the headline, which was written by WAPO, says "sexual violence" but there are no
details

Sure and if that’s what she/her lawyers had argued, that would be relevant. But she got up in the witness stand and told the jury about the sexual violence she allegedly experienced at the hands of Depp, right? I think on the face of it, she should have won but what she got up and said in court lost her the case.

Exactly! She actually said "that's why I wrote the oped about him".

So was she lying when she said the Op-Ed wasn’t about Depp or was she lying when she said it was about him?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Those of you who can’t understand that there can be grey areas and nuance (like how AH can be nuts and manipulative but also a victim of domestic violence) are a serious problem in our country.

This. The jury (and the public) viewed this as a “pick a side” situation. It’s not.

Heard write an op-ed alleging that Depp has abused her. While she obviously has her own issues, it’s fairly apparent from the evidence that he was, at a minimum, verbally and emotionally abusive. I also personally find the evidence that he was physically abusive at times believable (for instance I believe he threw his phone at her, especially since this was corroborated by another person). But even if you think she exaggerated or faked injuries, there is a lot of evidence that he definitely yelled, went on drunk rampages, belittled her in public (the incident on the plane was corroborated by multiple witnesses AND Depp’s own texts!). That’s DV. That’s partner abuse. She did not lie in her op-ed. She did not defame him. Whatever you think of her personally, she’s entitled to speak publicly about abuse, which she obviously experienced. Depp is also entitled to speak about the things she did and tell people this situation was complicated, which it was.

What makes me angry is that by making this a referendum on Heard’s personality and worthiness as a victim, this trial and verdict have reinforced the idea for DV survivors that speaking up and speaking out opens them to character assassination. It will silence victims, and it will help perpetuate abuse. No person is perfect and victims of abuse OFTEN have mental health issues and other problems that may make them less likeable. I have worked directly with rape and DV survivors for years and a significant part of my training focuses on how challenging people who have been this can be. I have worked with a lot of survivors who I found draining, who had abrupt and seemingly manipulative emotional displays. People who have lived for years with abusers, especially those with substance issues, HAVE to be manipulative— they must learn to manage their partner’s behavior to protect themselves. It is a survival technique.

Depp was abusive. Full stop. Therefore Heard’s op-Ed was truthful. That should have been the end of the case. Everything else was pure character assassination. Heard doesn’t need to be innocent or likable in order to be right here.

His side was able to prove republishing of the sexual violence title of that op-ed which was the worst allegation and one no one believed. She was always going to lose on count one. I get you think Depp should be sacrificed for the greater good of “Believe all women no matter what”. The fact that you can’t see an issue with this is disturbing. This case is about two Hollywood actors. That’s ALL it should be about.

Did she even write the title? I thought WaPo did. I don’t see how she can be held accountable for that.

She re-tweeted it. That’s what mattered. People really shouldn’t be opining on this case if they didn’t follow the trial. I watched all of it. AH was not credible. Credibility is key in jury trials.

You watched all of it? Do you not have a job or children or something else to fill your days? She retweeted the op-Ed with the title written by the Post. Was it possible to retweet it without the title? She still didn’t write the title.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Those of you who can’t understand that there can be grey areas and nuance (like how AH can be nuts and manipulative but also a victim of domestic violence) are a serious problem in our country.

This. The jury (and the public) viewed this as a “pick a side” situation. It’s not.

Heard write an op-ed alleging that Depp has abused her. While she obviously has her own issues, it’s fairly apparent from the evidence that he was, at a minimum, verbally and emotionally abusive. I also personally find the evidence that he was physically abusive at times believable (for instance I believe he threw his phone at her, especially since this was corroborated by another person). But even if you think she exaggerated or faked injuries, there is a lot of evidence that he definitely yelled, went on drunk rampages, belittled her in public (the incident on the plane was corroborated by multiple witnesses AND Depp’s own texts!). That’s DV. That’s partner abuse. She did not lie in her op-ed. She did not defame him. Whatever you think of her personally, she’s entitled to speak publicly about abuse, which she obviously experienced. Depp is also entitled to speak about the things she did and tell people this situation was complicated, which it was.

What makes me angry is that by making this a referendum on Heard’s personality and worthiness as a victim, this trial and verdict have reinforced the idea for DV survivors that speaking up and speaking out opens them to character assassination. It will silence victims, and it will help perpetuate abuse. No person is perfect and victims of abuse OFTEN have mental health issues and other problems that may make them less likeable. I have worked directly with rape and DV survivors for years and a significant part of my training focuses on how challenging people who have been this can be. I have worked with a lot of survivors who I found draining, who had abrupt and seemingly manipulative emotional displays. People who have lived for years with abusers, especially those with substance issues, HAVE to be manipulative— they must learn to manage their partner’s behavior to protect themselves. It is a survival technique.

Depp was abusive. Full stop. Therefore Heard’s op-Ed was truthful. That should have been the end of the case. Everything else was pure character assassination. Heard doesn’t need to be innocent or likable in order to be right here.

His side was able to prove republishing of the sexual violence title of that op-ed which was the worst allegation and one no one believed. She was always going to lose on count one. I get you think Depp should be sacrificed for the greater good of “Believe all women no matter what”. The fact that you can’t see an issue with this is disturbing. This case is about two Hollywood actors. That’s ALL it should be about.

Did she even write the title? I thought WaPo did. I don’t see how she can be held accountable for that.

She re-tweeted it. That’s what mattered. People really shouldn’t be opining on this case if they didn’t follow the trial. I watched all of it. AH was not credible. Credibility is key in jury trials.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One of the jurors admitted that they thought they both abused each other.

Ok fine, no one said she was perfect. However, if he abused her, then she did not defame him by saying she was a victim of domestic abuse. How do people not get this?

Perhaps, but did she not also accuse Depp of raping her with a bottle in the op-Ed? I don’t think anyone has said they believe that allegation, which was also apart of the civil suit.

his name is not even in the Op Ed and there are no details... the headline, which was written by WAPO, says "sexual violence" but there are no
details

Sure and if that’s what she/her lawyers had argued, that would be relevant. But she got up in the witness stand and told the jury about the sexual violence she allegedly experienced at the hands of Depp, right? I think on the face of it, she should have won but what she got up and said in court lost her the case.

Exactly! She actually said "that's why I wrote the oped about him".

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Those of you who can’t understand that there can be grey areas and nuance (like how AH can be nuts and manipulative but also a victim of domestic violence) are a serious problem in our country.

This. The jury (and the public) viewed this as a “pick a side” situation. It’s not.

Heard write an op-ed alleging that Depp has abused her. While she obviously has her own issues, it’s fairly apparent from the evidence that he was, at a minimum, verbally and emotionally abusive. I also personally find the evidence that he was physically abusive at times believable (for instance I believe he threw his phone at her, especially since this was corroborated by another person). But even if you think she exaggerated or faked injuries, there is a lot of evidence that he definitely yelled, went on drunk rampages, belittled her in public (the incident on the plane was corroborated by multiple witnesses AND Depp’s own texts!). That’s DV. That’s partner abuse. She did not lie in her op-ed. She did not defame him. Whatever you think of her personally, she’s entitled to speak publicly about abuse, which she obviously experienced. Depp is also entitled to speak about the things she did and tell people this situation was complicated, which it was.

What makes me angry is that by making this a referendum on Heard’s personality and worthiness as a victim, this trial and verdict have reinforced the idea for DV survivors that speaking up and speaking out opens them to character assassination. It will silence victims, and it will help perpetuate abuse. No person is perfect and victims of abuse OFTEN have mental health issues and other problems that may make them less likeable. I have worked directly with rape and DV survivors for years and a significant part of my training focuses on how challenging people who have been this can be. I have worked with a lot of survivors who I found draining, who had abrupt and seemingly manipulative emotional displays. People who have lived for years with abusers, especially those with substance issues, HAVE to be manipulative— they must learn to manage their partner’s behavior to protect themselves. It is a survival technique.

Depp was abusive. Full stop. Therefore Heard’s op-Ed was truthful. That should have been the end of the case. Everything else was pure character assassination. Heard doesn’t need to be innocent or likable in order to be right here.

His side was able to prove republishing of the sexual violence title of that op-ed which was the worst allegation and one no one believed. She was always going to lose on count one. I get you think Depp should be sacrificed for the greater good of “Believe all women no matter what”. The fact that you can’t see an issue with this is disturbing. This case is about two Hollywood actors. That’s ALL it should be about.

Did she even write the title? I thought WaPo did. I don’t see how she can be held accountable for that.

She re-tweeted it. That’s what mattered. People really shouldn’t be opining on this case if they didn’t follow the trial. I watched all of it. AH was not credible. Credibility is key in jury trials.

You watched all of it? Do you not have a job or children or something else to fill your days? She retweeted the op-Ed with the title written by the Post. Was it possible to retweet it without the title? She still didn’t write the title.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Those of you who can’t understand that there can be grey areas and nuance (like how AH can be nuts and manipulative but also a victim of domestic violence) are a serious problem in our country.

This. The jury (and the public) viewed this as a “pick a side” situation. It’s not.

Heard write an op-ed alleging that Depp has abused her. While she obviously has her own issues, it’s fairly apparent from the evidence that he was, at a minimum, verbally and emotionally abusive. I also personally find the evidence that he was physically abusive at times believable (for instance I believe he threw his phone at her, especially since this was corroborated by another person). But even if you think she exaggerated or faked injuries, there is a lot of evidence that he definitely yelled, went on drunk rampages, belittled her in public (the incident on the plane was corroborated by multiple witnesses AND Depp’s own texts!). That’s DV. That’s partner abuse. She did not lie in her op-ed. She did not defame him. Whatever you think of her personally, she’s entitled to speak publicly about abuse, which she obviously experienced. Depp is also entitled to speak about the things she did and tell people this situation was complicated, which it was.

What makes me angry is that by making this a referendum on Heard’s personality and worthiness as a victim, this trial and verdict have reinforced the idea for DV survivors that speaking up and speaking out opens them to character assassination. It will silence victims, and it will help perpetuate abuse. No person is perfect and victims of abuse OFTEN have mental health issues and other problems that may make them less likeable. I have worked directly with rape and DV survivors for years and a significant part of my training focuses on how challenging people who have been this can be. I have worked with a lot of survivors who I found draining, who had abrupt and seemingly manipulative emotional displays. People who have lived for years with abusers, especially those with substance issues, HAVE to be manipulative— they must learn to manage their partner’s behavior to protect themselves. It is a survival technique.

Depp was abusive. Full stop. Therefore Heard’s op-Ed was truthful. That should have been the end of the case. Everything else was pure character assassination. Heard doesn’t need to be innocent or likable in order to be right here.

His side was able to prove republishing of the sexual violence title of that op-ed which was the worst allegation and one no one believed. She was always going to lose on count one. I get you think Depp should be sacrificed for the greater good of “Believe all women no matter what”. The fact that you can’t see an issue with this is disturbing. This case is about two Hollywood actors. That’s ALL it should be about.

Did she even write the title? I thought WaPo did. I don’t see how she can be held accountable for that.

She re-tweeted it. That’s what mattered. People really shouldn’t be opining on this case if they didn’t follow the trial. I watched all of it. AH was not credible. Credibility is key in jury trials.