Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the difference between falling in love and limerence?

For DCUM it's the new buzzword, used to convince themselves they can save their marriage, AP is evil and just tricked spouse and spouse could never truly have feelings for AP.

Sorry, Sweetie. It’s not love. He’s not leaving his wife for you.

I'm not having an affair. But just think about what you are saying here, you want to spend the rest o your life with a man who is a cheater, who has zero regard for your emotional or physical safety... You aren't the winner here, sweetie.

My spouse isn’t having an affair. There are plenty of delusional women in limerence.

There is a single woman on this forum that has been in an 8-9 year affair with a married man that keeps saying he loves her so much and is going to leave the wife. It’s been a decade of her life. She could have found someone to commit 100% love to her and only her, had babies, a family, etc. instead she’s wasted her youth. I think there is mental illness involved with these types of things. I mean don’t you want to spend Xmas Eve/Xmas together even? How is that love? It sounds incredibly lonely and very low self-esteem. No single guy ever?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the difference between falling in love and limerence?

For DCUM it's the new buzzword, used to convince themselves they can save their marriage, AP is evil and just tricked spouse and spouse could never truly have feelings for AP.

Sorry, Sweetie. It’s not love. He’s not leaving his wife for you.

I'm not having an affair. But just think about what you are saying here, you want to spend the rest o your life with a man who is a cheater, who has zero regard for your emotional or physical safety... You aren't the winner here, sweetie.

My spouse isn’t having an affair. There are plenty of delusional women in limerence.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the difference between falling in love and limerence?

For DCUM it's the new buzzword, used to convince themselves they can save their marriage, AP is evil and just tricked spouse and spouse could never truly have feelings for AP.

Sorry, Sweetie. It’s not love. He’s not leaving his wife for you.

I'm not having an affair. But just think about what you are saying here, you want to spend the rest o your life with a man who is a cheater, who has zero regard for your emotional or physical safety... You aren't the winner here, sweetie.

My spouse isn’t having an affair. There are plenty of delusional women in limerence.

There is a single woman on this forum that has been in an 8-9 year affair with a married man that keeps saying he loves her so much and is going to leave the wife. It’s been a decade of her life. She could have found someone to commit 100% love to her and only her, had babies, a family, etc. instead she’s wasted her youth. I think there is mental illness involved with these types of things. I mean don’t you want to spend Xmas Eve/Xmas together even? How is that love? It sounds incredibly lonely and very low self-esteem. No single guy ever?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell me about how you started an affair because your spouse was driving you nuts using big words you always had to look up.

Lol!
OP, why didn’t you explain it using a word or phrase that you knew people would understand? Are you showing off or what’s the story there?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the difference between falling in love and limerence?

For DCUM it's the new buzzword, used to convince themselves they can save their marriage, AP is evil and just tricked spouse and spouse could never truly have feelings for AP.

Sorry, Sweetie. It’s not love. He’s not leaving his wife for you.

I'm not having an affair. But just think about what you are saying here, you want to spend the rest o your life with a man who is a cheater, who has zero regard for your emotional or physical safety... You aren't the winner here, sweetie.

My spouse isn’t having an affair. There are plenty of delusional women in limerence.

Anonymous wrote:Tell me about how you started an affair because your spouse was driving you nuts using big words you always had to look up.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the difference between falling in love and limerence?

For DCUM it's the new buzzword, used to convince themselves they can save their marriage, AP is evil and just tricked spouse and spouse could never truly have feelings for AP.

Sorry, Sweetie. It’s not love. He’s not leaving his wife for you.

I'm not having an affair. But just think about what you are saying here, you want to spend the rest o your life with a man who is a cheater, who has zero regard for your emotional or physical safety... You aren't the winner here, sweetie.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the difference between falling in love and limerence?

For DCUM it's the new buzzword, used to convince themselves they can save their marriage, AP is evil and just tricked spouse and spouse could never truly have feelings for AP.

Sorry, Sweetie. It’s not love. He’s not leaving his wife for you.

Anonymous wrote:Generally speaking, I'd say "falling in love" is when you are already in a romantic relationship with the person and it gets stronger, whereas "limerence" is when you're not in a romantic relationship, but you want to be, and you develop an unhealthy obsession with that idea.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:a “limerant affair” is just an affair. “limerance” is falling in love. I feel like people are creating these notions to distract from the fact that their spouse is having an affair. calling it “limerance” doesn’t make in any more or less real.

Not every affair is about love though. For a lot if men, particularly the ones that didn’t know the person IRL and just bang on a lunch break once a month, it is just sex. Period. They will say whatever the person wants to hear. If they aren’t bringing them out in public and trying to see them at all costs, it’s neither a limerent affair, certainly not love.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:a “limerant affair” is just an affair. “limerance” is falling in love. I feel like people are creating these notions to distract from the fact that their spouse is having an affair. calling it “limerance” doesn’t make in any more or less real.

Not every affair is about love though. For a lot if men, particularly the ones that didn’t know the person IRL and just bang on a lunch break once a month, it is just sex. Period. They will say whatever the person wants to hear. If they aren’t bringing them out in public and trying to see them at all costs, it’s neither a limerent affair, certainly not love.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the difference between falling in love and limerence?

For DCUM it's the new buzzword, used to convince themselves they can save their marriage, AP is evil and just tricked spouse and spouse could never truly have feelings for AP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the difference between falling in love and limerence?

Not an expert, but having watched two men burn their lives to the ground over affair partners, the difference to me is whether a person retains any sense of balance or perspective.

I've fallen in love, but I still had a family, friends, work, hobbies and other elements of my life/personality. I wouldn't have traded those things for my partner, and certainly not all within six months. It's truly more like an addiction than it is a normal relationship. Everything becomes about the next "fix" (date/sex/interaction) and nothing else in their lives feels important enough to save.

This is pretty spot-on IMO.

Anonymous wrote:What is the difference between falling in love and limerence?