Katherine
Anne
Margaret
Jane

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Jessica
Stephanie
Cierra

Are 17, 15 and 10. Public schools. Oldest two are from your early (young!) marriage. Cierra is the half sister from your second marriage(his first) but you hate that term and it is never used. The girls are sisters, period.

Holy Moses! Abercrombie clothes, body spray, flip flops, lip gloss and tank tops everywhere. You no longer even bother to clean Jessica's room. It's best to keep the door closed. Jessica has been on Homecoming Court once, her freshman year, but that was before she had THE boyfriend, the one who breaks up with her just before major events like her 16 th birthday, Christmas and the night before SATS.

Stephanie is brash, loud and confident. More confident than Jess. She hangs out with a close group of girlfriends and can't be bothered to have a boyfriend. Stephanie and Jessica fight all of the time and don't even talk to each other at school.

Cierra is more reserved than her big sisters and sometimes the age difference seems like an insurmountable chasm. Cierra does her own thing and for the first time, you are immersed in the world of sports...Steph and Jess just dabbled in tee ball and cheer, but lost interest in about 4th grade. Cierra plays lacrosse, soccer and will be going to basketball camp.

You and your DH are both FT with fairly inflexible hours, 9-5 type jobs. You thought you could count on the older two to supervise Cierra, but, yeah, that's not happening, so you are always scrambling.

Actually, Jessica went out with my DS's freshman roommate, and the way I heard it, SHE broke up with him right before his first set of mid-terms. DS called me, "Mom, what do I do? He's crying." Over Christmas vacation, she dumped a huge pile of photos, dried-out corsages, stuffed animals, etc., onto his front lawn. Ever since DS got home from school he's gotten at least one text a day from the roommate agonizing over whether he should get back together with her. DS always resonds the same way: "F*&% no, man. She's a crazy, control freak b*&%."

Phoebe
Phaedra
Thaddeus
Margaux

Anonymous wrote:Dylan
Catherine

Dylan and Catherine both attend the Waldorf School. You love the focus on nature and encouraging curiosity, but you secretly let them watch T.V. Your husband is a runner and has recently begun training for a marathon. You miss waking up with him next to you in bed each morning, but you are enjoying the look and feel of his newly defined abs. You do a fair amount of shopping in consignment and thrift shops even though you can afford to buy things at full cost. You like the thrill of finding something good in under heaps of stained knits and abandoned knitting projects. You have gone through various crafting stages including crocheting, felting, scrapbooking, and jewelry making. You used to belong to a CSA since so many of the other Waldorf families do that, but it just ended up being a major waste of uneaten and wilted vegetables. You would have thrown it into your compost pile, but you keep forgetting to do that. Perhaps you should leave a post it note on the garbage can to remind yourself to put the scraps in the compost pile. You have a post it note on your bathroom mirror to remind yourself to floss your teeth. Sometimes that works. You occasionally shop at the Bethesda Farmer's Market, but then then you end feeling angry because it is just so darn expensive and you wish there was a thrift store for produce. Your husband thinks your various phases of interests are amusing and he generally goes along with them, but he did not support your idea to replace the guest room toliet with a composting toliet. Your in-laws were grateful for his protest. Your children are occasionally embarrassed by your clothing choices, but are primarily focused on their own interests and pursuits like slack-lining and writing poetry.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Edward
Claire
Henry

You are Republican. You live in Potomac. You play tennis. Every day. You will celebrate your upcoming anniversary with a Mediterranean cruise and you will think that Venice is disgusting and dirty. You are respected for your active volunteer work in the community and your generous donations to local charities. Your children go to private schools, just like you and your husband did. You host all of the major holiday celebrations for your family because your house is the biggest and you like to be in control. Your siblings are jealous of your life and you like that. Your children are polite, friendly, but bland. Henry will give you some trouble when he gets older and you will probably have to support him long after college because he will lack any motivation or drive. Edward and Claire will be fine, but distant until they have children and then your relationship with them will deepen. You will love being a grandmother and they will love spending time with you, especially during the holidays when you pull out all of the fancy decorations and delicious treats. Your secretly fantasize about gaining a lot of weight and eating good bread smothered with fancy French butter.

Just this last bit is right but I do LOVE fancy butter.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sam

You're a single mom. Sam is a gentle, kind kid and your ex was an asshole. You were afraid Sam would be like him, so you left. You bought a house in Hyattsville and times were tough but then Sam grew up and didn't need daycare and you moved up at work. You lead a nice, simple life- you and Sam have a quiet dinner and watch National Geographic channel at night before bed. You like when he sleeps in your bed, but worry you'll then become the "single cosleeping mom" so you don't let him. You hope that one day you'll meet someone nice and marry again, but wouldn't be heartbroken if you didn't. You saved up all year and you and Sam are going on a cruise this summer, just the two of you. You can't wait.

This is a pretty darned good description of a friend of mine whose son is named Sam. He grew up into a fine young man; he's going to a top law school in the fall. His mom remarried -- to a colleague -- and they're very happy. She fulfilled a long-time dream of hers by changing careers. When this becomes a Lifetime movie-of-the-week Sela Ward is going to play mom.

Anonymous wrote:Best DCUM thread ever!

OK, I'll give it up:

Sam
Evan
Lily

Hit me with your best shot!

You had Sam and Evan without any difficulty and love them both dearly, but you were determined to have a girl so you put your name in the hat to adopt from China. And then you waited and waited and waited. When you finally got that wonderful referral, Sam was in high school and Evan was in middle school. You had forgotten what it was like to change diapers on very little sleep while also dealing with the bundle of issues that come with international adoptions. Your sweet, Lily, is a fierce and fiery toddler who keeps all of you alternating between adoration and bewilderment. You now juggle soccer tournaments with play groups and therapy sessions. You can't remember the last time you had sex with your husband and you find yourself forgetting important dates and familiar names. You are parenting a very different child at a very different stage of life and it all feels out of whack, but you can't admit that to anyone because you have plastered on a joyful smile while popping in another annoying children's cd. All will eventually settle down and you will sleep again and Lily will lead a fairly happy life and your boys will be proud of their multicultural family and your husband will be relieved to have you hold his hand again.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Rhyann
Kayla
Damon
Lauryn

Go!

Cheesy exurbanites. You park your obnoxious SUV in handicapped spots. You only come in to the city once a year under duress when your relatives visit from Ohio. And then you only walk up and down on the Mall with your big white sneakers and cargo capris.

Totally agree

No, this is just mean. The one where mom worked at the Pizza Hut and married her HS boyfriend was funnier and more interesting. Loved that Kayla is mom's least favorite kid.

Dylan
Catherine

Xavier
Xaden

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Methinks the people on this particular page are full of shit

I bet the majority are on the up and up.

Who cares? We're having fun; if you're not, go have a mojito.

Anonymous wrote:Best DCUM thread ever!

OK, I'll give it up:

Sam
Evan
Lily

Hit me with your best shot!

Gahhh, I want to reserve this, because my client is here. Can I do that?! Will get to it in 2 hours, max.

Anonymous wrote:Jaelynn
Jarrett
Ella

Jaelynn was an oops pregnancy your senior year of high school. You graduated pregnant, had him in the summer, and then did two years of community college. His dad is a loser who peaked in high school. Last you heard he was in jail for meth production. You are from the south, non-urban, and moved here for a job opportunity with the federal government. You met your DH at work, he was the tech guy in the office. Very introverted and you drew him out of his shell. Jarrett and Ella are biracial.

You live in Silver Spring and are so grateful you escaped your no-name town. You love that your DH is an intellectual.

Best DCUM thread ever!

OK, I'll give it up:

Sam
Evan
Lily

Hit me with your best shot!

Your DH is from a family of 12?