Step 1. be attractive
Step 2. be on the extra-thin side, grow out your hair + highlights, whiten your teeth, get subtle Botox and drop your age to 29
Step 3. smile a lot and be cheerful

This will get you 90% of single men. To get a traditional man, go to a wealthy church and look for a man who is a decade older than you.

Asking at mid thirties how to marry a rich guy (and having the young family and comfortable, baggage free lifestyle she presumably wants) is like a person asking at mid thirties how to get yourself into Harvard.

Anonymous wrote:I do not make good money due to poor decision making regarding my college major and subsequent work in the non-profit sector. I am not particularly ambitious or talented at climbing the corporate ladder so I always knew I wanted to marry a rich guy so I can have a better quality of life. The problem is, I can’t seem to attract well-to-do men. All my boyfriends have been the free-spirited, artistically inclined. One was trained as an engineer but preferred to work as a fitness instructor and the other had a graduate degree in liberal arts but was starting his own business.

I know what I want. I want someone ambitious and no nonsense who wants a comfortable upper middle class life. I want to be his wife and raise our kids while happily working a less stressful job or working on my passion projects.

What do I bring to the table?

I’m reasonably pretty, nice and a good home maker. I also love children and sex. I am in my mid thirties.

Please help!

With your negative realities and because you seem very average, the maximum you can get is someone who works as a fitness instructor. Sorry, but the UMC lifestyle is not for you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I met a woman at my club whose kid was in the same Big 3 as mine, different grade. She bragged about being a SAHM and landing a rich guy. It wasn't too long before she mentioned that he was still married when they started dating. Her child was about 5 at the time and his kids were young adults. She had the audacity to tell me he spends too much time with his older kids. I can't really look at her the same anymore. I can't believe some people are so brazen. Don't do this! She is about 20 years younger than the rich guy. She is very pretty (Russian blonde, who plays a smashing game of tennis).

Is she actually Russian? Bagging the married man may have been the whole point to stay in the us.

Yup.

And of course she is good at tennis, probably little else!

And what is OP good at? She brings little to the table and a "rich" guy can probably sniff out her gold digging ways immediately. Most rich guys I know didn't marry useless blobs who just want to raise kids to save them from the boring and unproductive lives they have condemned themselves too. What's in it for him?

OP also seems...joyless. A sad sack. Who wants to be stuck with that?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I met a woman at my club whose kid was in the same Big 3 as mine, different grade. She bragged about being a SAHM and landing a rich guy. It wasn't too long before she mentioned that he was still married when they started dating. Her child was about 5 at the time and his kids were young adults. She had the audacity to tell me he spends too much time with his older kids. I can't really look at her the same anymore. I can't believe some people are so brazen. Don't do this! She is about 20 years younger than the rich guy. She is very pretty (Russian blonde, who plays a smashing game of tennis).

Is she actually Russian? Bagging the married man may have been the whole point to stay in the us.

I don't know her immigration status, so this could be true. I actually liked her before she told me this. She was quiet and sweet, but her lack of a moral compass was an instant friendship killer. I'm educated and privileged. I married my equal.

I don't want or need friends like her. It's sad that women do that sort of thing to each other. Men don't behave like this.

Anonymous wrote:There are nice, traditionally-minded men out there who seek out nice, reasonably attractive women who want to be homemakers, problem is those men do not stay single and childfree into their mid-thirties. Successful mid-thirties guys who want to be married are already married; if they aren't married it's because they're having their fun ruling the dating market and have their pick of women (and probably dating younger than OP).

Some of them are, in NYC. Also some of them get divorced after a bad first marriage.

There are nice, traditionally-minded men out there who seek out nice, reasonably attractive women who want to be homemakers, problem is those men do not stay single and childfree into their mid-thirties. Successful mid-thirties guys who want to be married are already married; if they aren't married it's because they're having their fun ruling the dating market and have their pick of women (and probably dating younger than OP).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Steal him from someone else.

If you don't mind the ethical issues, this could be an option. You could probably find a late thirties/early 40s rich man in an unhappy marriage who you might be able to snag if you "accidentally" get pregnant. You would likely not want to target a "player" but a geeky engineer type who didn't date much before his marriage. I know someone who pulled off something similar- she didn't get pregnant but went from being the OW to the DW.

Tried this, failed. He was a good guy who would not leave his kids. He was mid 50s. Ended badly for me.

The key, according to this extremely dreadful woman I know, is to find one who doesn't have kids but wants them, and is married to a woman who can't/won't have them (or keeps postponing them). It worked well for her because it also provided reasons to marry quickly after his divorce (so they could have a kid soon) which means no real time for him to stop and think about whether this is a good idea after the ink dries on his divorce.

Her DH is kind of an oblivious idiot (obviously) and they are deeply mediocre parents, but he's rich and they get tons of family support so I guess it works out okay.

I honestly feel terrible for people who think and behave this way. I married a man I fell in love with because we cared about each other and liked our life together. We had a kid when we were ready. We are not wealthy but we are far from poor and have pretty much everything we need. I'd feel weird if I jumped through a bunch of calculated hoops to nab a rich guy to build a slightly nicer facsimile of an actually happy family. But you do you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I met a woman at my club whose kid was in the same Big 3 as mine, different grade. She bragged about being a SAHM and landing a rich guy. It wasn't too long before she mentioned that he was still married when they started dating. Her child was about 5 at the time and his kids were young adults. She had the audacity to tell me he spends too much time with his older kids. I can't really look at her the same anymore. I can't believe some people are so brazen. Don't do this! She is about 20 years younger than the rich guy. She is very pretty (Russian blonde, who plays a smashing game of tennis).

Is she actually Russian? Bagging the married man may have been the whole point to stay in the us.

Yup.

And of course she is good at tennis, probably little else!

And what is OP good at? She brings little to the table and a "rich" guy can probably sniff out her gold digging ways immediately. Most rich guys I know didn't marry useless blobs who just want to raise kids to save them from the boring and unproductive lives they have condemned themselves too. What's in it for him?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ok the question is WHERE do you meet these type of guys

Not what the standards are that you should already meet

And the answer is in college. I know that’s not what you want to hear but the place where a nice girl can meet a (potentially) rich guy is college. You get married a few years after graduation and you’re together when he’s building wealth. OP wants to marry the guy after he’s built wealth when he’s more savvy and can have anyone he wants including much younger and hotter women.

+1

I actually agree with this. You want to grow together. In your case, OP - grow money together. Most men know to look out for women like you. Men are not a paycheck. Have some self respect.

Anonymous wrote:I do not make good money due to poor decision making regarding my college major and subsequent work in the non-profit sector. I am not particularly ambitious or talented at climbing the corporate ladder so I always knew I wanted to marry a rich guy so I can have a better quality of life. The problem is, I can’t seem to attract well-to-do men. All my boyfriends have been the free-spirited, artistically inclined. One was trained as an engineer but preferred to work as a fitness instructor and the other had a graduate degree in liberal arts but was starting his own business.

I know what I want. I want someone ambitious and no nonsense who wants a comfortable upper middle class life. I want to be his wife and raise our kids while happily working a less stressful job or working on my passion projects.

What do I bring to the table?

I’m reasonably pretty, nice and a good home maker. I also love children and sex. I am in my mid thirties.

Please help!

OP, you need to gain perspective, like so many on these boards. You think money is everything, and you refuse to think otherwise.

Get a life, and you might just be happy - though I doubt you know how, and that in itself is the saddest part.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I met a woman at my club whose kid was in the same Big 3 as mine, different grade. She bragged about being a SAHM and landing a rich guy. It wasn't too long before she mentioned that he was still married when they started dating. Her child was about 5 at the time and his kids were young adults. She had the audacity to tell me he spends too much time with his older kids. I can't really look at her the same anymore. I can't believe some people are so brazen. Don't do this! She is about 20 years younger than the rich guy. She is very pretty (Russian blonde, who plays a smashing game of tennis).

Is she actually Russian? Bagging the married man may have been the whole point to stay in the us.

Yup.

And of course she is good at tennis, probably little else!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a bunch of single male friends in your age range who are well-off (I'm similar, but happily married). None of them are looking for a low-ambition wife who is just pretty and brings nothing to the table. You say you like sex and having children. Well, just about every woman loves children and most women love sex (at least during the dating phase).

My theory is that these guys would feel the other guys in our group would look down on him if he's just getting a "trophy" wife.

Unfortunately, she isn’t qualified to be a trophy wife at this age. Mid Thirties and only reasonably good looking disqualifies her.

+1000 OP will never attractive man of wealth. She may sleep with a man on the side. Unless you’re willing to sleep with a senior citizen you’re not going to marry a rich man.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guys, OP has a college degree and works at a non-profit! You're acting like she is a squeegee kid or something

This is DC. It’s not “a college degree!”, it’s “only a college degree”

No profit income wants a meal ticket. Rich men are smart at your age, be prepared to sign a prenup you’ll get nothing and he will cheat on you.

Anonymous wrote:I met a woman at my club whose kid was in the same Big 3 as mine, different grade. She bragged about being a SAHM and landing a rich guy. It wasn't too long before she mentioned that he was still married when they started dating. Her child was about 5 at the time and his kids were young adults. She had the audacity to tell me he spends too much time with his older kids. I can't really look at her the same anymore. I can't believe some people are so brazen. Don't do this! She is about 20 years younger than the rich guy. She is very pretty (Russian blonde, who plays a smashing game of tennis).

Is she actually Russian? Bagging the married man may have been the whole point to stay in the us.